Athene Posted November 7, 2004 Share Posted November 7, 2004 Hi, I'm new to this post writing lark and to be absolutely honest I am in a conundrum on what I should do. I'll try and keep this short and also to give you a brief outline on my situation. I have been in a ldr for about a year and we have always tried to meet up every couple of months to keep the spark alight. The last time he come over to meet me we made the decision of us moving in together next year and to start our lives together as a couple and after my divorce has come through to get married. One thing lead to another and we both decided that having a child would reinforce our reunion. So we took the step of throwing caution to the wind and well...... So here I am a couple months later and two months pregnant. Which I hastened to add that I am absolutely over the moon with. We have been in contact with eachother every day and have spoken on the phone at least once a day (he lives in the US and I live in the UK). Everything was going swimmingly until today when I recieved a IM from what I thought was him. 'He' come online and went straight off which I thought was a tad bit strange. Then 'he' come back on and asked who I was which I thought was very strange and then I thought he was playing a joke. So I said i was his fiancee and only the mother of his unborn baby. To cut a long long story short I found out it was his live in girlfriend I was iming. The shock and realistion hasnt completely hit me yet but I did phone him up earlier and asked him what the hell was going on. He said he was splitting up with his girlfriend and that he wanted me and wanted a life with me. He has now booked up a flight and flying out to see me in the next couple of days to have a very long talk with me. Well at this moment I havent exactly registered what has gone on, all I have got is questions running through my mind. Like why did he have a live in girlfriend and then pursue me. Why did he talk about future plans.....and the big question.....should I dump his arse on the kerb. If anyone has any advice or has been though a similar situation i would so gratefuly appreciate a response. Link to post Share on other sites
katty Posted November 7, 2004 Share Posted November 7, 2004 I feel for you and your story makes mine seem so simple. I to have been in a LDR but it seemed to be working fine for both of us b/c we were both in a crucial point in our careers and both had little time for anything else, We had discussed marriage and also living together but I was hesitant about moving b/c I had just opened my own business (which could be moved no problem) and I have dogs, a year ago he broke up with me for a few weeks said he was confused. OK I accepted that and moved on. He called and we got back together but I held my ground about not moving forward etc. b/c I think that is what freaked him out before. Well finally I was at the point where I was ready to move in with him, after months of convincing me we were meant to be, I finally caved. However I wouldn't agree to move just yet,. well everything was going fine, or so I thought and then he broke up with me again, used the excuse of I wouldn't move, my business, my dogs, I thought maybe he was just scared and would be back like last time so I gave him space, well we assured each other we loved one another etc. and now 2 months later I call him and guess what he tells me he is engaged. Hows that for fast. So anyways just wanted to tell you that I feel your pain and I do hope that you get the answers you so deserve. Sometimes we come across people who can't leave someone w/o having someone to replace them with I don't know why they are this way they just are. Just remember to take very good care of yourself and your baby. Its definitely not a good time to get stressed out over him. Try and eat right and get plenty of rest. I will say an extra prayer for you tonight. Take care Kat Link to post Share on other sites
Author Athene Posted November 7, 2004 Author Share Posted November 7, 2004 Thank you kat, I really hope everything works out for the best for you and your situation. Men are definitely strange creatures I think i should've become a nun as my choice in men is appalling. I have to agree with the replacement theory it seems like it in my case. Take care and keep me upto date with your situation. Athene Link to post Share on other sites
katty Posted November 7, 2004 Share Posted November 7, 2004 Yes please keep me posted on how things are going for you. I would be real curious to see what excuse he has for still having a g/f, I am sure it will somehow be all her fault, just kidding. Please keep posting and remember we are here for you. Link to post Share on other sites
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