The Game

[hayewils]

Your not alone hurts,

Everything you said, i feel and think the very same thing. When my ex left, and while i was trying to correct things, i told her that the attraction only comes very seldom. There was the attraction to her that i had, it was like destiny. I to feel that it wont happen again. Its like a once in a lifetime opportunity. But, i also know today, those feelings were not mutual, she did not love me, accept, or respect me as i did towards her. So at the same time, i have to think that it wasnt the right relationship for me. There were lots of times ive thought about how this marriage should not have happened. I almost broke up with her in 2008, we werent engaged yet but, i saw the person that she is. I always put everything off as my insecurities. Today i see the eggshells i walked on, i always had to be careful what i said to her. I said the wrong thing during our honeymoon candlelight dinner and she got up and left me sitting there alone. I was so embarrased. She came back and apologized but at that moment was when i knew i had to be careful of what i said.

Never again!

I would much rather be alone than to be with someone that i can speak my feelings, everything to her was nothing but drama in her ears.

To hell with that.

There is someone out there for us, may just take a little while to find her, but i promise you this, when we do find the one, shes gonna be perfect and all worth the wait..

[hayewils]

My point tho,

If im still single in a year and a half, so be it.

I am prepared to be single and im fine with that.

Would much rather be single than lied to like i have been for the last 6 years.

Also, if your trying so hard to find that love, you may not find it.

It comes to us when we arent looking.

I too have been on websites but cancelled my membership with them.

Im not gonna try anymore. That special someone will show up eventually.

Even if she is on the other side of the world, God will get her to us..

[2.50 a gallon]

hayewils

 

You get it.

 

When I was younger, knowing I couldn't find the girl of my dreams by setting at home, I used to force myself to go to parties that I wasn't interested in attending, for who knows she might be there. To be honest I did meet lots of women that I later dated. But never THE ONE.

 

From my experience, it usually happened when I least expected it. I call it my winds of love theory. It almost always seemed to happen when I was no longer looking, and was just happily moving down the road of life. Then one day I go around a corner of that road and there she is. And the weird thing is, looking back, it is as if some unknown force, magically brought us together.

 

My Ex-fiancé would be a good example. My nurse friends had conspired for me to meet one of their friends. At first we hit if off, and over time, my family, her family began making wedding plans, just about the time I started to have reservations about having to listen to her coming home every night talking about sick and dieing people.

 

It was heavy on my mind, and can recall when I finally made up my mind to call everything off, as I was driving by a sporting goods store about a half mile from apartment. I can even remember looking over at the store, and thinking, what is wrong with me, why can't I fall in love.

 

That night I let everybody know, there was not going to be a wedding.

 

At that time I was an out door person, and probably had been in that store at least once a week for the past year, buying fishing gear, baseball equipment, clothes etc. A week later I take back a glove that I had just bought, which had fallen apart with its first game. That is when we met. The odd thing was, that was her one year anniversary for working at that store. Why we had never met, being as I was a big time customer is a mystery, other than it was time for us to meet.

 

Think about it, how often do you buy a new glove, have it fall apart the first time you use it, then when taking it back meet the woman of your dreams.

[2.50 a gallon]

There was nothing spectacular about meeting my EX. She moved into my apartment complex, set her eyes on me, then using her sexiness, suckered me into marrying her.

 

I rode with my parents on the way to the church, and it was a short ride, less than 10 minutes. My dad was a C&W fan and the car radio was never on anything else. But that day it was on an oldies station, and I ask you was it an accident that the song that played had her name in the title, like "Run Around Sue" where the powers that be trying to give me one last warning.

 

Also, I can remember a Spanish gal I dated, Victoria, did not like being called Vicky. It started out slow, friends, turned to a fun date, another fun date, then dinner and a movie, next date she invited me for dinner and she was the main course.

 

I went home that night thinking that I might have found that special someone, we had made a second date the following night to celebrate that we had found each other.

 

When I got to work that next morning was told to go home and come back that evening, as the normal night guy had been in an accident. I did not know where she worked to give her a change of plan message. The plan was for her to refresh at work and go straight to the restaurant. I left a note on her door, but she claims she never got it, and besides it was too late as I had already stood her up.

 

Later I realized that maybe, I had just dodged a bullet. She had this feisty attitude and her never showing a sentile of trying to understand how my work hours had suddenly changed. Our relationship would have been her way or the highway.

[revitup]

2.50's theory is very similar to Rev's "Dragonfly" theory....

 

I think of it like trying to catch a Dragonfly,the harder you chase a Dragonfly.... the further away from you the Dragonfly goes.

 

When sitting on the river bank fishing or in the yard just relaxing....the Dragonflies will land all over you!

 

You won't get this if you're not from the country maybe,but it is exactly what happens.

 

REVITUP

[hurts_so_bad]

You'll get there. Like everyone always says.. you find it when your not looking for it. I've heard some pretty crappy things about PoF. I wouldn't know as I have never looked at it but I've heard it's basically a "hook up" sight.

 

Loneliness sucks. I'm sorry you are going through this. It will get better you know.

 

It seems to me that the new normal is to just have a casual hook up and nothing more. It's sad really that society promotes this kind of behavior. Have people really become so selfish and self serving that no one ever sticks anymore? Everywhere I look marriages are falling apart, people are blatantly cheating, walking away, abandoning children, spouses, responsibilities. All I ever hear is: I'm just not happy at home, I deserve happiness, I just wish I could be happy. I have to wonder why everyone is so unhappy all the time? Are people really that foolish to think they are going to find happiness somewhere by abandoning their lives for something new? A rational person might think these people will spend their entire lives bouncing from one relationship to another because they are just too stupid to realize that the OOEY GOOEY feelings ALWAYS fade. I guess they will just keep chasing the elusive happiness. When are people going to quit looking outside of themselves for happiness? When are people going to realize that happiness isn't a place, a person, a thing you can find and hold on to. It's just moments in time, happy moments, sad moments, angry moments....it's called LIFE.

 

excellent post! You took the words right out of my mouth! As a man with morals I see whats going on with the world today and it makes me sick to my stomach!

[revitup]

1 This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.

 

2For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,

 

3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,

 

4 Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;

 

5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.

 

6 For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts,

 

7 Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.

 

 

The Bible says it plainly.......

 

REVITUP

[hurts_so_bad]

I am a strong believer in the law of attraction...It basically states to pretend you already have what you want...Might sound dumb and like a childish game but I get the whole idea of it which kind of ties into once your not looking you find...

 

When you pretend you have what you want as the law of attraction states you have a different mind set...A mind set of being content..When your content you are happier..like = like..So if your down and out the universe gives you exactly what you are gving! Down and out!

 

So if you have the mind set that you are content and happy...You put out content and Happy and the universe gives you more of that..

 

Thats why when people truely stop worrying about finding someone and are content BAMB! it happens...

 

Im a very strong believer in it cause you see it time and time again..in all different situations in life!

 

With love it always happens when you least expect it and most of the times when you dont really need to find it cause your fine the way you are..

 

My buddies and I used to play cards all the time...We had this one friend Joey..He was as cheap as a clams @ss! This kid had a good job young and at about 22 years old already had about $200 grand saved! His parents didnt have money, He was just a saver! Save he did! I think he probably still has his baptism money! Anyway, This kid would NEVER NEVER lose!

Worst he would do is break even and that was very rare! MOst of the time he won..Which goes back again to the law of attraction..He had no fear of losing money cause he had plenty of it..So the universe gave him more..Thats why they always say never gamble with scared money!

[RonaldS]

I honestly don't have any interest in finding another relationship. I'm just happy to finally be clear of this mess. I'm happy to wake up and not have there be another person there. My XW and I have been apart for 3 years, and in that time, I've wanted less and less and less with every passing day to have another committed relationship.

 

I've learned the difference between being alone and being lonely. I appreciate and enjoy being alone. But I'm not lonely, because there's always some silly girl or girls lingering around for when I'm in the mood for....well, whatever I'm in the mood for. Not just sex. Maybe sometimes I just want to grab a couple of drinks or brunch on a Sunday morning. There are always girls around, and we can have fun and conversation and whatever else, and then when we're done, I go do my thing and don't think about it.

 

Some people will tell you that that's an empty existence, as if the existential goal of the universe is to share your life and your self with another person. Please. I have 3 amazing kids that I have outstanding close relationships with and a rewarding, fulfilling, GIVING career. I have friends all over the place. I love fly fishing and playing basketball and camping and golf and travel. I live in the middle of a great neighborhood in one of the great cities in the world.

 

I don't have an empty moment in my life. In other words, I wouldn't trade this for anything. I don't question other people wanting to have that special person and partnership and love....hey, whatever blows your hair back. But there is a great life outside of a relationship.

[hurts_so_bad]

I honestly don't have any interest in finding another relationship. I'm just happy to finally be clear of this mess. I'm happy to wake up and not have there be another person there. My XW and I have been apart for 3 years, and in that time, I've wanted less and less and less with every passing day to have another committed relationship.

 

I've learned the difference between being alone and being lonely. I appreciate and enjoy being alone. But I'm not lonely, because there's always some silly girl or girls lingering around for when I'm in the mood for....well, whatever I'm in the mood for. Not just sex. Maybe sometimes I just want to grab a couple of drinks or brunch on a Sunday morning. There are always girls around, and we can have fun and conversation and whatever else, and then when we're done, I go do my thing and don't think about it.

 

Some people will tell you that that's an empty existence, as if the existential goal of the universe is to share your life and your self with another person. Please. I have 3 amazing kids that I have outstanding close relationships with and a rewarding, fulfilling, GIVING career. I have friends all over the place. I love fly fishing and playing basketball and camping and golf and travel. I live in the middle of a great neighborhood in one of the great cities in the world.

 

I don't have an empty moment in my life. In other words, I wouldn't trade this for anything. I don't question other people wanting to have that special person and partnership and love....hey, whatever blows your hair back. But there is a great life outside of a relationship.

 

Oh I believe it...I on the other hand want nothing more to feel the warmth of the love I once had..Thats what makes me different from you..Not that your way or mine is wrong its just different...I think back sometimes and found myself wanting to change my self in hopes that these feeligns will go away...

 

I found it to be impossible..I think that sometimes life just changes us..When bad things happen to you your skin tends to get thicker..Although I may feel this way now a year and a half out, I may feel the same way you do when Im at the three year mark.. YOu never know

 

All I know is I want to be happy again..Whatever that takes! I have my days of good and my days of bad like everyone else even the people in LTR's...Difference is their days may be bad with problems etc..May days are bad cause of emptiness inside and that to me is the worst bad day you can have in comparison to just having a bad day at the office or having a fight with the ole lady! I kinda welcome that at this point!

[2.50 a gallon]

My winds of love theory takes it deeper, it is more along the lines, when you are ready, love will not only find you, but in some way be directed into your path.

 

There is another part of my getting together with my GF that remains untold.

 

After I finally went on the attack, she began listening to me. There were a number of times she had climbed up on the railing, ready to jump ship, then would chicken out.

 

I was a mere 7 or 8 years old, when my family took its first trip west. Although it has been 60+ years, I can still remember that first visit. We crossed a viaduct over the trains, went up a hill, then on the down side, the road swung right and around a small lake with a small amusement train running around it. I had found the place I wanted to live. That has been my goals all of my life.

 

But the ways of life, took me in all directions but. Every other year I would visit and renew my vow to live there.

 

A couple of years after I returned from the left coast, back to my home town, I began sending resumes to jobs sites in Denver. Vacation time I had it all planned out to go there and interview for jobs. And even had my current GF talked into going with me, she could find a job and start a new life there.

 

At the last second she once again chickened out. I went, got an unbelievable job offer. I even went so far as to go to that area of Denver and put down the deposit on an upstairs apartment.

 

Alas, when I got back home, everything had changed. She had fought with her BF, moved out and quit her job. I had no way of contacting her. The only hint was that she had moved to a small town outside of our big city. Small enough, that if I did a search, I should be able to find her. So I began my search. Gave the job site in Denver a story about my mother being falling and me needing to stay and help her recover.

 

I never did find her.

 

A year later, at vacation time, I take off on Saturday night for guess where? I lose a headlight, too late to get a replacement, so back home.

 

Sunday night my niece calls, the family is out of town, her battery has died in a bad part of town

 

Monday, last thing I do was wash my dishes, kitchen sink breaks, water every where, have to wait until the morning to get repairman to fix it.

 

Tuesday I discover my gas tank is leaking.

 

Wednesday, I get my truck back at about rush hour traffic time. Repack and before I leave I need to gas up, check for leaks, and to get something at the Wally like store 5 miles away.

 

Gas up, then to avoid the mess getting on the freeway, I take a side street to the next entrance. That is when I spot her, she is out by the street picking up her mail. Thirty seconds earlier or later, I drive by and never seen her again.

 

Coincidence! I think not. She had just broke up with her BF and he had just moved out. She could no longer chicken out and was ready to find someone new

 

Also, had we taken off the year before, I was not ready. I would have disappeared into my historical research.

 

Somehow, someway, the winds of love saw that at last we were both ready, and brought us together. It wasn't no accident

Edited September 9, 2013 by 2.50 a gallon
missing word

[hurts_so_bad]

My winds of love theory takes it deeper, it is more along the lines, when you are ready, love will not only find you, but in some way be directed into your path.

 

There is another part of my getting together with my GF that remains untold.

 

After I finally went on the attack, she began listening to me. There were a number of times she had climbed up on the railing, ready to jump ship, then would chicken out.

 

I was a mere 7 or 8 years old, when my family took its first trip west. Although it has been 60+ years, I can still remember that first visit. We crossed a viaduct over the trains, went up a hill, then on the down side, the road swung right and around a small lake with a small amusement train running around it. I had found the place I wanted to live. That has been my goals all of my life.

 

But the ways of life, took me in all directions but. Every other year I would visit and renew my vow to live there.

 

A couple of years after I returned from the left coast, back to my home town, I began sending resumes to jobs sites in Denver. Vacation time I had it all planned out to go there and interview for jobs. And even had my current GF talked into going with me, she could find a job and start a new life there.

 

At the last second she once again chickened out. I went, got an unbelievable job offer. I even went so far as to go to that area of Denver and put down the deposit on an upstairs apartment.

 

Alas, when I got back home, everything had changed. She had fought with her BF, moved out and quit her job. I had no way of contacting her. The only hint was that she had moved to a small town outside of our big city. Small enough, that if I did a search, I should be able to find her. So I began my search. Gave the job site in Denver a story about my mother being falling and me needing to stay and help her recover.

 

I never did find her.

 

A year later, at vacation time, I take off on Saturday night for guess where? I lose a headlight, too late to get a replacement, so back home.

 

Sunday night my niece calls, the family is out of town, her battery has died in a bad part of town

 

Monday, last thing I do was wash my dishes, kitchen sink breaks, water every where, have to wait until the morning to get repairman to fix it.

 

Tuesday I discover my gas tank is leaking.

 

Wednesday, I get my truck back at about rush hour traffic time. Repack and before I leave I need to gas up, check for leaks, and to get something at the Wally like store 5 miles away.

 

Gas up, then to avoid the mess getting on the freeway, I take a side street to the next entrance. That is when I spot her, she is out by the street picking up her mail. Thirty seconds earlier or later, I drive by and never seen her again.

 

Coincidence! I think not. She had just broke up with her BF and he had just moved out. She could no longer chicken out and was ready to find someone new

 

Also, had we taken off the year before, I was not ready. I would have disappeared into my historical research.

 

Somehow, someway, the winds of love saw that at last we were both ready, and brought us together. It wasn't no accident

 

I agree...Many many years ago when I was about 16 or 17 I worked for a butcher shop..There was this girl kim that was infactuated with me but I had no interest in her..She would wait outside my butcher shop everyday from 4pm till 7pm just for me to get out to talk to me...On saturdays I worked the full day cause I didnt have school and she would wait outside even longer..

 

I had no interest in her but she did have a really cute friend that I liked...One day out of the clear blue on a sunday she comes to my house..My mom answered the door and came inside to tell me she was outside..I told my mom to tell her I wasnt home but my mother refused to lie to her..

 

I decided just to wait it out for her to leave, why I dont know but I did..Next thing you know 10 min later her girlfriend (the one who I thought was cute) came in and asked me why I didnt like her friend..I told her she is just not my type and I went on to tell her that I liked her..

 

She said Im sorry but I cannot do that to my best friend... We all still talked to the point where the butcher retired and I left, then we lost contact all together..

 

years later I was maybe 22 and finally getting over a breakup with an ex I was with for like 2-1/2 years...I had just come from the beach with a few friends when I spot this girl I was talking to a week earlier...She was cute and I tried to lay my rap to her about a week earlier and gave her my number but did not hear from her..

 

When I saw her I beeped my horn and she turned around looked at me and said, "Billy?" I was pretty impressed that she remembered my name! She walks over to the car and starts talking to me when I realize, This is NOT the girl I was talking to last week! Who the hell is this girl!? lol..

 

So she kind of notices that Im a bit off and asks me, You dont remember me do you? I start laughing and said no! She said then what the hell did you beep the horn for? I said, cause i thought you were someone else I met a week earlier..She started laughig and said it me Kims friend..Remember the girl who used to wait for you outside the butcher shop?

 

Then it clicked! boy did she grow and change! That was around 1992..we were married in 1994 and spent 17 years together!

[2.50 a gallon]

This is the woman you are hurting over?

[hurts_so_bad]

This is the woman you are hurting over?

 

Yes that was my wife for 17 years..Not really hurting as much any more though..starting to realize that its over and that I do have a lot of value to many many women out there! It took a while but I am starting to realize it now...

 

It also feels good that I was the last one to deny her! lol

 

They may not be women I really want to be with but as the song goes "Love the one your with" I am doing so and just having fun till the right one comes along...

[revitup]

Yeah but if we all had listened to ...

 

"TAKE TIME TO KNOW HER"

 

We wouldn't be listening to "Love the one you're with" or "It's sad being with the wrong one when the right one comes along"

 

That's just me though.

 

REVITUP

[2.50 a gallon]

h-s-b

 

You are finally getting it. It is called moving on in life.

 

rev

 

There are always exceptions, I was with the Ex for exactly 2 and half years before we married.

 

It is weird how it worked for us. One year exactly to the day of our meeting, we broke up. That was my fault, as I still wanted to party.

 

Two and half years to the day we met, we married.

 

Three years to the day we met, was the day I caught her kissing the OM

 

How's that for timing?

[hurts_so_bad]

Yeah but if we all had listened to ...

 

"TAKE TIME TO KNOW HER"

 

We wouldn't be listening to "Love the one you're with" or "It's sad being with the wrong one when the right one comes along"

 

That's just me though.

 

REVITUP

 

Truth is you never know someone 110%..We all thought we took time to know her and when the day she said I DO came along, we thought for sure we knew her! Until one day the stranger comes along and kicks us right between the eyes..Compliments of Billy joel!

 

I admit I made mistakes in my marriage...Real bad ones for a long time! Drinking, arrests, gambling, not coming home..BAD ONES!

 

The time was bound to come when she left..Thats why I have changed my life around in a 180...This way next time around I know that it wont be my fault if something like this unfortunately happens again..

 

Its painful to think what exactly happened! Did she leave because of what Ive done? or would this have happened no matter what? That I will never know..

 

That to me is exactly why I hung on so long..I knew the mistakes I made and took much of the blame..If I was a great husband I would have walked away without looking back! It probably would have been easier that way..

 

I am never getting married again (too much risk) but the next LTR I have I will be sure I do exactly what I am supposed to do as a friend and a lover this way I have no doubt that the other party is wrong..

[hayewils]

Truth is you never know someone 110%..We all thought we took time to know her and when the day she said I DO came along, we thought for sure we knew her! Until one day the stranger comes along and kicks us right between the eyes..Compliments of Billy joel!

 

I admit I made mistakes in my marriage...Real bad ones for a long time! Drinking, arrests, gambling, not coming home..BAD ONES!

 

The time was bound to come when she left..Thats why I have changed my life around in a 180...This way next time around I know that it wont be my fault if something like this unfortunately happens again..

 

Its painful to think what exactly happened! Did she leave because of what Ive done? or would this have happened no matter what? That I will never know..

 

That to me is exactly why I hung on so long..I knew the mistakes I made and took much of the blame..If I was a great husband I would have walked away without looking back! It probably would have been easier that way..

 

I am never getting married again (too much risk) but the next LTR I have I will be sure I do exactly what I am supposed to do as a friend and a lover this way I have no doubt that the other party is wrong..

 

Amen to this..

I also know what my mistakes were, but I also don't think anything would've made a difference.

I always felt like, and still do today, that she was gonna leave one way or the other.

today I can see the snob that my ex really is. she is one who thinks she is better than everyone else.

I do not understand why she ever married me, I never hid anything.

what I did, we usually did together.

anyway, besides all that, I also have zero intention of getting married again.

I see no reason in it. I can have a girlfriend or two or three.. hell maybe they would all like each other two.. that would be different and maybe a little exciting.. LOL

but now, its all about me. but who knows, we all say it now..

in time, we may all feel different.

[hurts_so_bad]

Amen to this..

I also know what my mistakes were, but I also don't think anything would've made a difference.

I always felt like, and still do today, that she was gonna leave one way or the other.

today I can see the snob that my ex really is. she is one who thinks she is better than everyone else.

I do not understand why she ever married me, I never hid anything.

what I did, we usually did together.

anyway, besides all that, I also have zero intention of getting married again.

I see no reason in it. I can have a girlfriend or two or three.. hell maybe they would all like each other two.. that would be different and maybe a little exciting.. LOL

but now, its all about me. but who knows, we all say it now..

in time, we may all feel different.

 

 

True but with the stories Im hearing with how guys are literally getting murdered in divorces its not worth the risk anymore! No one is held resposible fir their horrible action! Many even rewarded which is totally totally disgusting! I have that taste in my.mouth now from the stories Ive heard there is no way in hell I am giing to allow myself to be taken advantage of by a potential piece of garbage...my ex who went threw

Hell with me gave me a pass not to destroy me I will be damned to give anyone else the opportunity too!

[2.50 a gallon]

h-s-b

 

I am actually a little envious that you were able to get together with an early love

 

My first love, I was a senior, she was a junior, still today in my mind one of the prettiest faces that I have ever met. The problem was her parents were super religious, into an almost cult like religion. It was like almost everything that was fun was forbidden.

 

Her best friend, was the sister of one of my good friends, so on the sneak we were able to do some things, but never were we able to be alone.

 

About Christmas time, she was able to talk her parents into letting her go to a school dance, under the watchful eye of her strange brother. We did get to dance a couple of times, the last towards the end of the evening, she threw her arms around my head and pulled me down for our first and only kiss.

 

Which her brother noticed, squealed and thereafter she was forbidden to have anything to do with me.

 

I went off to college expecting that she would eventually marry into this religion.

 

Fast forward, about 20 years, I fly into Denver, and an walking down one of those long corridors to the exit, when I notice a flight crew, pulling their roll away luggage, and by far the cutest one looked like her. I almost called out her name, but there was not way she could be a stew.

 

Fast forward another 30 years, she contacts me thru the internet. In all likely hood it was her, as yes, she was a retired stewardess. And yes at that time we had both caught our Ex's cheating, so both of us were available at that time and she was living in Colorado. And both of us wish I would have said something, as she like me remembers me as her first love and that special kiss, and wish we would have had a chance to try each other out.

 

I rather doubt that we would have ever become serious, as she shortly hooked up with a married an international pilot

[hurts_so_bad]

How long did it take some of you guys to get out of your funk!? Im super frustrated here! I have met some women but none that I am interested in! I am so damn frustrated! Im not a ugly dude so I cant understand what the F is going on!

 

I have figured out myself and everything but I am still left with this hole in my chest that I cant fill! almost every damn day I get hit up by a women on pof and they are not what I am looking for..The ones I do like either dont want to be bothered or they start off and then stop..

 

I am so F'n pissed cause I know things would be so much different if I was able to drive..I know many of these women see my profile and it puts a big L on my head if you dont drive. I am the furthest thing from a loser and it really bothers me!

 

I have a union job as an electrician, I own my own home, pay my bills, pay my child support, have a side business on ebay, what the hell else do women want! I dont get it! Just venting I guess!

[secondfailure]

How long did it take some of you guys to get out of your funk!? Im super frustrated here! I have met some women but none that I am interested in! I am so damn frustrated! Im not a ugly dude so I cant understand what the F is going on!

 

I have figured out myself and everything but I am still left with this hole in my chest that I cant fill! almost every damn day I get hit up by a women on pof and they are not what I am looking for..The ones I do like either dont want to be bothered or they start off and then stop..

 

I am so F'n pissed cause I know things would be so much different if I was able to drive..I know many of these women see my profile and it puts a big L on my head if you dont drive. I am the furthest thing from a loser and it really bothers me!

 

I have a union job as an electrician, I own my own home, pay my bills, pay my child support, have a side business on ebay, what the hell else do women want! I dont get it! Just venting I guess!

 

It just seems like you are looking for love in all the wrong places. Sometimes you have to just go along in life happy go lucky. Then you meet someone you never knew you would. I have only been going through this for 3 weeks so I really am in no postion to speak to the dating scene. a part of me wants to hit up a dating sitres just to ease this pain.... But I have to rebuild myself emotionally, mentlly and physically. Don't force it. Just let it come...

[2.50 a gallon]

h-s-b

 

I understand your frustration and your need to fill that empty space that once contained your loving heart. But if finding true love was as easy as buying a box of cigars, what would be that value of it?

 

What you are going through is what all of us have to go through.

 

She has to be extra special, as when you start a relationship, you have to give up on looking for the rest of your life. So in order to attract you she initially has to have a face that you can kiss good morning to for the rest of your life. Then she has to have an above average body to go with the face. Women like that don't come into our lives every day. On average, I would meet some one of that calibre, every few months.

 

And then once you do meet she has to be available, and similarly attracted to you. And then as you get to know each other, you have to have similar interests, a similar out look on life, sex, religions, tastes, etc, which weeds out even more, or they lose interest in you. And then believe it or not there has to be some differences, to bring new things, ideas, etc, into our lives, for who wants to marry their twin.

 

And then like a newly forming star, that has to be a hot spark that ignites the fire of passion.

 

So what are we up to 1 in several hundred, or a thousand.

 

The exciting thing about finding that someone, one never knows when love will suddenly appear

 

It took me about 12 weeks and a half dozen times asking her out, before I finally got a date with my Ex-fiancé. She agreed to go fishing with me, as that was something she had always wanted to try. But she once again reminded me on the way out to the river, to not get any ideas about us ever being boy friend and girl friend, as I was too short, too poor and too old.

 

That was about 9 in the morning on a Thursday, the next day, at 6 in the afternoon, she was knocking on my door, to tell me she had broken up with her two boy friends, and could we order out for pizza

Edited September 21, 2013 by 2.50 a gallon

[hurts_so_bad]

It just seems like you are looking for love in all the wrong places. Sometimes you have to just go along in life happy go lucky. Then you meet someone you never knew you would. I have only been going through this for 3 weeks so I really am in no postion to speak to the dating scene. a part of me wants to hit up a dating sitres just to ease this pain.... But I have to rebuild myself emotionally, mentlly and physically. Don't force it. Just let it come...

 

I would NOT suggest dating sites unless you are extremely good looking or have a lot of money! I am a above average looking guy..Im not tooting my horn but I have been told many many times that I am a good looking guy and I believe it even so I hate the way I come in pics! lol..

 

Anyway, If you are really really good looking you will do fine..If your average you will get frustrated! You will get hit up by a bunch of women that you wouldnt date if you were blind! The ones you do message with interest either never answer or just waste your time..Its really a joke..

 

I really dont want to discourage you too much so give it a shot but dont let it get you frustrated like it does me! Who knows maybe you will have some luck!

[dumped2013]

Guys,

This is a great thread. I have read through it twice and it gives me hope that one day I will just happen to run into "the one"