Ex bf confuses me! Need help!

[holler21]

hey guys

 

i really need ur help but i only ever seem to get one reply!! and im sure there are more people out there who care...i cud talk to my best friend right now but hes like busy all week!

 

my bf dumped me 3weeks ago, but we av bin in contact, the reason why he dumped me is confusing but he told me that long-distance wudnt work, that he doesnt love me, and so many other little reasons....we've only known each other 4months....neway we kept in contact and he came back up home to see his family last week and we met up mon night...i avoided the talk about 'us' and just talked to him like he was a friend, even tho everything went wrong in the first half hour!! in a bar, a table collapsed on me with drinks on top of it and i was so nervous! neway we cudnt avoid the talk bout 'us' and i ended up saying sum bad things to him, and vice versa, but i said he just wasnt ready for a relationship...we kissed tho, he said hes likes it cos im a really good kisser but he doesnt cos its me! there was alot of confusion

 

we met agen thurs nite and he seemed like a completely different person! he said he just wants to be friends, nothing more...and even tho i wasnt okay with it i accepted it...we went clubbing and he seemed uncomfortable with the fact i was talking to other guys...neway nothing happend and he wanted to go home early but i wanted to stay so i did...i saw sum1 i liked and went to talk to them and we got quite close, 5mins later, my bf Adam comes back! i was so angry and asked him why but he just said "duno" and then said "i fought u had no money"...he wudnt leave til the end of the nite, and i wen i mentioned sum guy's name he told me to tell them to **** off! then i know ur gna say it was a bad idea, but i wanted him back at mine, and he eventually came...and we held each other all night in bed! in the morn, he initiated it and gave me a long kiss! and then i gues u know what happned next, but we didnt have propa sex as we have never done that, we were taking things slow...neway i was soo confused, and we just went back in town and i went to work and he went home! and now hes back at uni...im happy to see him as a friend but i just wondered if ne of u guys can try to analyse what happened here? even tho its me initiating most of the contact, he still replies to my texts, and he seems okay with me...and also he seems okay with the fact that im going down to see him next weekend as were goin to a gig 2gether, despite him saying that his flatmates mite wonder what im doing there! i cant have no contact with him or not be his friend cos i really love him...and he hasnt walked away from me either...do u fink i shud jus give this time and it wil work itself out?

 

x

[scorpiojimi]

Well it sounds to me like he just wants you for sex and you just want him to pay attention to you no matter what kind. He likes to kiss you because your a good kisser, but he doesn't like it because it's you. If he actually said that to you you he is a dick and doesn't deserve you. You should have more respect for yourself. Trying to make him jealous by talking to other guys and then luring him back to your place is not a healthy relationship. I think you should just be friends with him or don't see him at all, but definitely don't do any sexual favors for him!

[holler21]

i partly agree with what ur saying

 

i fink he said that cos he was drunk, and when ur drinking u sometimes say things u dont mean, when he kissed me in my bed it was passionate, it didnt feel like he was just kissing me cos im a really good kisser!

 

i wasnt trying to make him jealous, i just happened to start talkin to a few guys, most m8s of mine that i see out, wasnt like i did it on purpose! i was with him all nite! i dont see us being just friends yet, but i dont wna lose him, when he said he just wanted to be friends, he also said that we should go with the flow, if we kiss we kiss....and we did didnt we, so im happy to let things be for a while, and il try to chill out! lol