BF thinks I'm cheating - talking in my sleep

[briteeyes29]

I need some help here. I have been with my boyfriend for 6mons we live together. THis is going to be quite long and I hope that I get some replies cause I don't know what to to.

 

About a few mons ago my boyfrien told me I was talking in my sleep every night about someone name Dee. Which is my x boyfriend. He said that I was saying that I loved him and missed him. And there was one night he said that I must of had a sexual dream about Dee cause I kept saying how I wanted him to make love to me and that It felt so good and how he satisfies me etc etc.

 

Well I couldn't believe that I would say all that stuff in my sleep and clearly. Then a week later I bought a new purse and while I was cleaning the old one out I found a letter that Dee wrote to me when we were together. So I left the letter in there. Well my boyfriend was right there and he asked to see my purse, So he says to me as he is looking into it how did you fit all that in there. Then says oh you left something in there. So I took out the note ripped it up, he continues with well i hope that wasn't a layaway receipt i gave to you to hold. I said no its something that should of been tossed out along time ago, but i forgot it was in there.

 

In my opinion I believe that he went into my purse long before and found that letter thought it was recent and though I was cheating on him. Then decide he was going to say i have been talking in my sleep about a person name dee etc etc so he could find out. So What do you think?

 

The saga continues and gets worse. MY job was really stressing me out so he said to me leave I will take care of all the bills etc... So I listen to him. Well we end upo having money troubles. It came time to pay my car payment and car insurance. So I asked if he had the money to take care of them both. He told me yes write the checks out . Well a few days later I got calls that the checks bounced. So I went to him about it. He tells me that he just ound out that somebody got hold of his acct number and used it online at walmart and the bank was looking into to it. We had a joint acct and I have my own acct as well at the same bank. Well I got a loan from a fam member to take care of all my bills put it in my acct and paid everything to date. Money was left over then all of a sudden a transfer was taken from my acct I called the bank and they said that there was nothing from walmart.

 

Next still having money trouble he had 5 buxs left for cigs comes home with 4 packs so I asked where he got the money fro 4 pks so he said he borrowed it from work. Well my mom comes to me and tells me that he borrowed 60 buxs from her boyfriend.

 

So he has been lyin to me this whole time. Someone help me Please!!!

[bluechocolate]

With what? The letter? The talking in your sleep? The money? The lying?

 

I think 6 months was probably too soon to end up living together, but what's done is done.

 

About the money - well start working again. Separate your accounts fully & determine exactly who is responsible for what & for what amount each month & pay only your own way. I suppose he's free to bum money off of whomever but I would hate any partner of mine going to my family for money without coming through me first. Tell him not to do that again. Quite honestly I think you would be better off not living with this guy - keep going out with him if that is what you really want to do but I think you should get your own place.

 

And the next time he mentions you talking in your sleep ask him what's really on his mind.

[morrigan]

I wouldn't consider this guy to be a keeper. Potentially snooping through your purse, suspecting you of feelings for an ex, and lying/financial irresponsibility are not qualities I'd be admiring in a guy I've only been dating six months.

 

Whether or not you stay with your bf, don't have a joint account with him unless you are married to him. Pay your own bills and expect him to pay for his own.

[briteeyes29]

Its getting harder everyday for me he is pushin me to make a decision on whether I can trust him again and whether or not we are staying together or not. Everynight when he comes home from work the minuste he comes in I got sick to my stomache we eat dinner then I have agada the rest of night I can't sleep next to him I don't want him to touch me or be next to me.

[briteeyes29]

I would definitely appreciate any advice you all to give on my situation

[briteeyes29]

he lives with me so he would have to get his own place. I did go back to work only part time but I am right now looking for a full time job again and paln on only going to school P/T at night. but financially i can't live by myself right now so its harder for me to make my decision. As I posted earlier I am nausea around I don't want him to touch me etc...

[tiki]

The talking in the sleep this is weird, but not unheard of. Are you over your ex? Maybe you guys could spend some time apart to sort out feelings?

 

He's overbearing and possesive, you're talking about your ex in your sleep. Give it a break. See what goes down.

[morrigan]

Briteeyes29, you don't sound happy at all with this guy. I would suggest breaking up with him--he sounds a little to domineering for my personal taste. Tell him the relationship is over and ask him to move out--to his familys' or a friend's. Be firm on this.

 

If it's your place, it's your place--I would expect him to move out as soon as possible. If the house/apartment is in your name, he doesn't have any legal right to live there. Advertise for a roommate or at worst, attempt to move in with a friend/family member yourself. Don't stay with this loser--get a full time job and get his a$$ out of your life.