When to say when

[i-want-to-be-happy]

How do you know when to say when,

I am looking for some guidence, My husband and I are no longer connected

we have 2 children whom I feel like I raise by myself other than him supporting us

He is very distant with me and the kids .

I am so lost I feel like I am holding on to this realationship on a very thin thread and I seem to be

the only one holding, he never has time for he never wants to sex

and If I need anything from him he is very annoyed ,but when it come to a friend

of his or his band he is right there from them and happy to be.

we fight all the time. I love him I just can't take it anymore.

is it time to walk away??

[I-want-to-be-happy]

How do you know when to say enough is enough??

[Pocky]

After you've done everything you can to try and make it work. Does your husband recognize that there is a problem with your marriage? Have you discussed how you're feeling with him? Have you asked him if he's happy and how he feels about the marriage?

[I-want-to-be-happy]

I try to talk to him all the time . and he never wants to talk he will listen and just go to

sleep. than there will be sometimes when he is nice , when he knows I am ready to

to go. I just want my kids and myself to be important to him.

[sherell]

I have been exactly in your situation a year ago. I know how it feels to be so disconnected to your spouse. It is the loneliest feeling in the world. I too tried many times to talk with my husband about it. But it was always the wrong time, or I never got a real response. It got to the point where I was so miserable, I would cry myself to sleep everynite, or I would have these bizarre nitemares. I finally had to have the real TALK with him, and there was no turning back. Whatever the outcome, we had to face the truth about our marriage. It was not the scenario I hoped for, we separated, he was not up to fixing what was wrong. I was devasted, but we both got some counseling individually and that helped a great deal. Months later we went to counseling together (while still separated) It has been fantastic. It is now a whole year that has gone by, and he is moving back home this weekend. I have to say I would not wish the year we have had on anyone, a lot of it was hell, but it also was a huge wakeup call about what is really important in life, and how you can never take each other for granted. I don't know what the future holds, but I am optimistic about having the relationship I have always wanted with the person I married. I hope things work out for you, I think you need to have that serious talk, find the time. Therapy can really help, suggest it to your husband. I wish you the best

[MassiveAtom]

WOW!

 

For a minute there I thought you were my wife!!!

 

She has MADE the decision that enough is enough. She's leaving.

 

Our situations match almost exactly.

 

Your husband is not fulfilling his end of the deal by letting you spin in the wind of his life. If he's not open to changing or at least listen to you then you have to start doing everything you can to make your relationship work and cope with the stresses of marriage. You will fail sometimes. It'll hurt like hell, and you won't be able to work on anything but youraself. That's good.

 

One thing you might try, get involved in something other than your relationship. RElationship work is tiring and we all need breaks from it sometimes. Relax, have fun with the kids, OR WITHOUT THEM, that's okay. And build a life of your own. Could he have become disinterested? I know I did when my STBX pour everything in to the kids and I was left spinning in the wind of HER life.

 

IT's very hard, I know. And this is the beginning of the test of YOUR committment.

 

IMHO.

 

mA