LilGirlandOW Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 I dont know if once a cheater than always a cheater. Although, I think that there is the potential that it may be easier your second time around if you're still in the same unhappy situation.... you and your OW/OM loose touch... I think yeah it would be all that easier to jump in the OW/OM pool as the waters been tested and the unknown and taboo abyss has already been trekked. That being said I think an unhappy WS, can find an OW/OM, cheat with them... find the happiness and compatibility they were looking for and be content with what they have, thus never seeking the validation of an future AP. Link to post Share on other sites
So happy together Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 And there are the ones that stay and keep on doing whatever the heck they want to do. I am not sure if staying always means accepting the requirements to stay. Sometimes staying means I will do nothing and will force the other party to do all the work. From what I have seen (and I don't want to offend anyone with this) it is ^^^this scenario more often than not. Or, they fake it. Pretend. Which is pathetic, really. Link to post Share on other sites
velvette Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 From what I have seen (and I don't want to offend anyone with this) it is ^^^this scenario more often than not. Or, they fake it. Pretend. Which is pathetic, really. Hopefully in this case both BS and OW cut them loose as they are crappy partnership material in any relationship. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 I did it once and will regret it for the rest of my living life..Letting the people down that loved me dearly for seemingly nothing...Its the worst thing I have ever done and its not even debateable.. I am a horrible liar and dont handle guiilt very well, so for me its something that I can honestly say will never happen again as long as I live..The pain has been just too much to bear.. Some can do it with impunity, I dont know how... TFY Link to post Share on other sites
AlwaysGrowing Posted August 22, 2013 Share Posted August 22, 2013 I find it odd when someone refers to unhappiness....and finding happiness in another. Since when does another fix what is missing inside of US?? How does that work? I dont think it does, I think its only duct tape, it never addresses the core issues. I'm unhappy, I think I will try this person on and see how I look....wow...it feels so NOW. Until of course...tomorrow happens...and the NOW person is yesterdays news. Link to post Share on other sites
AlwaysGrowing Posted August 22, 2013 Share Posted August 22, 2013 I think many ap's would be shocked at the transformation their former ap can make in the wake of dday. Many waywards, became complacent within themselves...not the marriage, they stopped having self respect and sunk to lows that they never imagined. They stopped living consciously. When one wakes up, it is heart wrenching to witness their horror at themselves. To watch them throw up at the thought of the ap. Its like the beer goggles have come off and they go WTF!!!!!! I have met many fws, that I truly respect. Their clarity of thought, their happiness with who they are, irrespective if the marriage survived or not is inspiring. Link to post Share on other sites
Got it Posted August 22, 2013 Share Posted August 22, 2013 Hopefully in this case both BS and OW cut them loose as they are crappy partnership material in any relationship. This I agree with it. I "get it" to a point but at some timeline you have to get off the fence and/or come clean with everyone. The extra level of deception to continue lying when the BS initially finds out is what perplexes me. Link to post Share on other sites
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