9 month update - Sbxw and lawyer meeting.

[Caldespair]

Hey Gang

 

Its been a white but im long term marriage with wife who wanted out. Now doing the big time litigation nonsense.

I really felt I was turning the corner. Have been doing all the suggested things newly separated people should do like see old friends, play tons of sports, keep busy busy busy.

Today that all ended, at least the feeling decent part. I had a 4 way meeting with the lawyers and my sbxw. Did not go well to say the least. We had course words across the lawyers conference table, each of us still seems SO invested in this relationship. It seems like one of us is waiting for the other to yell "uncle".

I guess my point here is, its not a smooth a to z path. I mean I now feel like im at point A. Im kinda a wreck (mondays are always hard after busy weekends). I guess if I am honest with myself, I still Love my %$@#%% wife. I wont tell her, and I am no contact for months. But as I always say to myself, it could be worse.

thanks for letting me vent

[Mystery2Me]

Too right divorce is a long process. Today I finalized my divorce after 16 yrs of marriage.

 

For me I have not spoken to ex-husband in over a year. NC has been a soothing balm and allowed me to heal.

 

If you can please be kind to yourself and avoid creating new and lasting scars during the divorce process. SOOOOO many times I had to NOT take the bait to protect my ultimate sanity and not engage in the senseless game play.

 

YOURSELF is all you have in the end of this journey, so protect yourself at all cost.

 

~Best Luck-Mystery

[Caldespair]

Mystery

 

You are wise and correct. I will not take the bait and engage with her any longer. You may understand, Nc for last few months, then seeing her, and a flood of emotion came over me. Every emotion from love to loathe. It can be very disorientation and ultimately set me back emotionally. I hope to bounce back here soon. From now on its the high road not the low road.