freefalling Posted November 9, 2004 Share Posted November 9, 2004 I have been dating a great guy for over two years. We have talked about getting married when we both graduate from college, which will be in about a year. Sometimes I feel like I could happily spend the rest of my life with him, and sometimes I just have this feeling that something is missing. Its a feeling I thought would go away with time, but it hasn't and I'm worried it never will. I can't justify breaking up with him for this reason since everything is wonderful between us, but I know if we continue to stay together he will propose to me, and I don't want to say "yes" or "no" to him based on this feeling. Has anybody else felt the same way? Is it normal to sometimes doubt your relationship? What do people mean when they say "I just knew"? Does this mean no doubts whatsoever? Thanks for the input! Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted November 9, 2004 Share Posted November 9, 2004 Has anybody else felt the same way? Is it normal to sometimes doubt your relationship? I think every relationship -- even the so-called "healthy" ones -- go through that stage from time to time, but you bounce back. I'm guessing that because you're still in such a transitional stage in your life (i.e., college), the idea of a cemented relationship like marriage seems exciting, but it still gives you the willies. my advice? Don't sweat the marriage thing, but concentrate on enjoying life as a coed, tests and classes and parties and work and all. Once you graduate, it's a whole other ballgame because of the responsibilities you find yourself handling, including marriage. What do people mean when they say "I just knew"? Does this mean no doubts whatsoever? kind of hard to explain, just that you know when you know. you do have your doubts about things -- how are we going to work out the situation between our families/living so far from or so close to home/etc -- but the hope and belief you have in that relationship far outweighs the worries and doubts. I "knew" Richard was the man I wanted to share a married life with because I could see a future ... before that, I just wanted to do my own thing, living a carefree life as a roving journalist with little or no responsibilities to a husband. In fact, I could see myself with kids much more easily than I could a husband!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
tattoomytoe Posted November 9, 2004 Share Posted November 9, 2004 totally normal, especially since you are still young. look at it this way, you still have a leat another year to discuss this with your boyfriend and to see what happens. enjoy each other now, do not let fears or concerns of the future ruin what you have today. Link to post Share on other sites
katie79 Posted November 15, 2004 Share Posted November 15, 2004 I think most people experience doubt in some context during certain periods in the relationship. It's normal...as long as it hasn't been throughout the entire relationship! You normall have doubts and problems...it's a question of you both either get past it or you don't. I went through various periods of doubts w/ my fiance. But now I am happy and we are planning on getting married. Do what is right for you though. Link to post Share on other sites
kisslaboca Posted November 15, 2004 Share Posted November 15, 2004 It seems to be normal to have periods of doubts or uncertainty about the relationship. The Mars Venus guy mentions it in his books. You should take a look at them, he explains it better. i agree with quankanee for you just to enjoy your college life now. Tests, parties all that stuff is rather intense, fun and interesting. Don't think about him proposing in the future, nobody really knows what will happen for sure even tomorrow. LIfe has a way of throwing the most unexpected things your way. Ever heard the saying "live as if it was your last day alive"? Well, do that and just enjoy what you have now. Concentrate on being happy.Take it one day at a time. Link to post Share on other sites
kisslaboca Posted November 15, 2004 Share Posted November 15, 2004 Katie79 I have read your other posts and remember you were waiting for your fiance to propose in Sept. or something like this. So, did he do it? When are you getting married? You sound like a very nice and patient gf. I really hope all is going well for you, that he actually proposed and with a date that was acceptable to you and that you are past all that frustration you posted about earlier. Keep us informed. Link to post Share on other sites
vegasguyalone Posted November 26, 2004 Share Posted November 26, 2004 Just thnk it through and all will be ok. I am new to this forum and it has helped me quite a bit. I moved away from Ohio to Vegas but I'm not happy. I just been a looker but finally added my 2 cents worth. Just THINK IT THROUGH SLOWLY Link to post Share on other sites
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