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if you've been broken up with / broken hearted


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That's all you pulled away from 10 pages?

 

You don't have to buy anything, I'm talking my opinion, my experience, and what I've seen.

 

 

 

 

Barky

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So, if i don't want them back, i should make contact every month?

Yeah, kind of silly, but wait, after 2 years NC, i miss her still but i don't want her anymore. I want freedom!

Tips, my first ex, i dumped her, she did sth wrong after. I made contact after 5 years.... Cuz i was boring. So don't wait for dumpers.

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I really need to be taking my own advice and the advice here. I keep coming back to trying to put the pieces together of why we broke up. I still want answers. If I didn't care, that would show myself the progress I've made. I still do, I still try to think of "why this happened'. My thoughts make perfect sense. It was her, it is her self esteem, she clearly isn't happy with herself and needed to work on her. But, if she loved me, she wouldn't have done this to me...not now, not ever. I keep worrying about it and overthinking it. I mentally exhaust myself. 80% of my day's thoughts go towards this. I have to break free. Every free second I have comes back to the thoughts of why it all happened.

 

I haven't checked her FB for 6 weeks...no contact for 17 days, sent 2 texts tying up a loose end, now another 16 days of NC. I have to fckn get all these thoughts out of my head and move on. Its easier said then done...Siht, this is the most difficult thing I feel thus far in my life.

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I really need to be taking my own advice and the advice here. I keep coming back to trying to put the pieces together of why we broke up. I still want answers. If I didn't care, that would show myself the progress I've made. I still do, I still try to think of "why this happened'. My thoughts make perfect sense. It was her, it is her self esteem, she clearly isn't happy with herself and needed to work on her. But, if she loved me, she wouldn't have done this to me...not now, not ever. I keep worrying about it and overthinking it. I mentally exhaust myself. 80% of my day's thoughts go towards this. I have to break free. Every free second I have comes back to the thoughts of why it all happened.

 

I haven't checked her FB for 6 weeks...no contact for 17 days, sent 2 texts tying up a loose end, now another 16 days of NC. I have to fckn get all these thoughts out of my head and move on. Its easier said then done...Siht, this is the most difficult thing I feel thus far in my life.

 

I am feeling just like you.. How could she do this? Was with her for almost 5 years. She says I am not ready to get married and cause my race is different her parents won't accept it. How could she do this and why? We were so happy.. ugh I feel you man.

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"Exs know when your pulling away, even when you haven't talked to them in a long time. They feel it. The MINUTE I walked out of a bar with my buddies and was truly happy, the minute I got in my car my phone rang....it HAPPENS like that." - barky

 

Holy **** barky.... Have been 3 months NC, got my happiness back even went on a date last saturday.....and guess who wants to meet up...MY EX! They do have a weird sixth sense. The minute you feel indifference and have regained your confidence, BOOM.

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BUMP for the newly broken hearted people.

This thread helped me a lot at the beginning of my NC journey.Hasn't been that long though:D

I wanted to ask you a question barky but I don't remember what!

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"Exs know when your pulling away, even when you haven't talked to them in a long time. They feel it. The MINUTE I walked out of a bar with my buddies and was truly happy, the minute I got in my car my phone rang....it HAPPENS like that." - barky

 

Holy **** barky.... Have been 3 months NC, got my happiness back even went on a date last saturday.....and guess who wants to meet up...MY EX! They do have a weird sixth sense. The minute you feel indifference and have regained your confidence, BOOM.

First time in weeks I was making new friends and going away on vacation with a meetup group. Next day ex contacts me. These coincidences make you realize how weird the world works.

 

Downside is healing got set back a bit. But at least I know I can bounce back again from this.

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So an update... My ex did not want to meet up anymore...instead i got bitched out at 1am through texts saying she was upset i "liked" someones status on facebook. Is this a joke? Does she even know how much pain she put me thorough but was upset with something that lame... oh well. I don't understand people sometime

 

I would like some like some input from you guys... just really confused

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I am feeling just like you.. How could she do this? Was with her for almost 5 years. She says I am not ready to get married and cause my race is different her parents won't accept it. How could she do this and why? We were so happy.. ugh I feel you man.

 

 

Hey bro.. I got the same story as you. We were together for 6 years and all of a sudden she said she could not marry me due to religious differences. and She left me just in 3 days time.

 

Life is really awkward. Its 2 month of NC and i still cant find myself on how to make it work for me. I am totally down and shocked. It seems like life is really at end.

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organizedchaos
So an update... My ex did not want to meet up anymore...instead i got bitched out at 1am through texts saying she was upset i "liked" someones status on facebook. Is this a joke? Does she even know how much pain she put me thorough but was upset with something that lame... oh well. I don't understand people sometime

 

I would like some like some input from you guys... just really confused

 

Go back to NC and stay there. She doesn't sound very mature.

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So an update... My ex did not want to meet up anymore...instead i got bitched out at 1am through texts saying she was upset i "liked" someones status on facebook. Is this a joke? Does she even know how much pain she put me thorough but was upset with something that lame... oh well. I don't understand people sometime

 

I would like some like some input from you guys... just really confused

 

 

 

She pulled the string to see if you were still there.

 

She never had any intentions to meet up.

 

She got her ego boost then left.

 

Made up some crummy excuse to bail.

 

She sent you a breadcrumb, and you bit.

 

It's ok a lot of us do it, just know better for the future.

 

 

Barky

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Hey bro.. I got the same story as you. We were together for 6 years and all of a sudden she said she could not marry me due to religious differences. and She left me just in 3 days time.

 

Life is really awkward. Its 2 month of NC and i still cant find myself on how to make it work for me. I am totally down and shocked. It seems like life is really at end.

 

It sucks ass, I know.

 

But let me correct you.

 

Your life ISNT at the end.

 

That CHAPTER, however is.

 

Be excited for what's coming next, because something surely will!

 

Head up.

 

 

 

Barky

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It sucks ass, I know.

 

But let me correct you.

 

Your life ISNT at the end.

 

That CHAPTER, however is.

 

Be excited for what's coming next, because something surely will!

 

Head up.

 

 

 

Barky

 

Thanks mate.. your words are really motivating. I know youa re trying your best to cheer up the community and i must say you are doing it really well.

 

You said it right.. this CHAPTER of my life is closed but seriously i never wanted this chapter to be closed. Life was good when i was with her. I was Not the most happiest person but i can say safely that i was Happy living with her.

 

 

She is no more with me.. I have to live alone. her memories are KILLING ME! i dont know whats wrong but everything is killing me. I cant help myself. I have to sit alone all day and her memories come up everyday.

 

Just hope this would end soon. Your post made me fool better for some good 15mins but again i'm back to grief.

 

I dont know.. its just an emotional rollercoaster for me.

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I want my ex to be missing me but he already has someone else. He had her the day he started NC. How can all the memories be haunting only me?? He caused the break up! And I am left to suffer alone. So not fair!!

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I want my ex to be missing me but he already has someone else. He had her the day he started NC. How can all the memories be haunting only me?? He caused the break up! And I am left to suffer alone. So not fair!!

 

I know exactly how you feel. My ex did the same thing to me.

As I said in another thread:

 

My ex IMMEDIATELY jumped into another RS like a week later so he'll be all cozy and content this holiday season with his ridiculous rebound but I'll be cozy and content too knowing that I don't have toxic waste in my life anymore and staying true to myself by moving on and healing in all the healthy ways. :D:p:confused::):laugh:

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I know exactly how you feel. My ex did the same thing to me.

As I said in another thread:

 

My ex IMMEDIATELY jumped into another RS like a week later so he'll be all cozy and content this holiday season with his ridiculous rebound but I'll be cozy and content too knowing that I don't have toxic waste in my life anymore and staying true to myself by moving on and healing in all the healthy ways. :D:p:confused::):laugh:

 

AMEN SISTER!

 

I always made my ex most of his gifts. He loved that sentimental crap.

I hope she only makes him miserable. lol

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I want my ex to be missing me but he already has someone else. He had her the day he started NC. How can all the memories be haunting only me?? He caused the break up! And I am left to suffer alone. So not fair!!

 

I dealt with this too. That feeling of being absndoned to pick up the pieces. It's one of the worst feelings. Ths person who you would normally go to is the source of your pain. These feelings take months to reconcile and process. It seems very unfair.

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Thanks mate.. your words are really motivating. I know youa re trying your best to cheer up the community and i must say you are doing it really well.

 

You said it right.. this CHAPTER of my life is closed but seriously i never wanted this chapter to be closed. Life was good when i was with her. I was Not the most happiest person but i can say safely that i was Happy living with her.

 

 

She is no more with me.. I have to live alone. her memories are KILLING ME! i dont know whats wrong but everything is killing me. I cant help myself. I have to sit alone all day and her memories come up everyday.

 

Just hope this would end soon. Your post made me fool better for some good 15mins but again i'm back to grief.

 

I dont know.. its just an emotional rollercoaster for me.

 

You said it yourSelf, you weren't the most happiest person with her.

 

So you were content.

 

That's no way to live.

 

So once again, be excited for the next chapter, because the person you'll end up with, you will be the happiest person in the world.

 

 

 

Barky

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A question... I keep reading about the loneliness peak that is supposed to appear efter 3-4 weeks of NC. This is a time when mostly good memories remain and the dumper may start to wonder if she did the right thing.

 

I know that there are always risk involved contacting exes and that it's better to focus on yourself. But let's say you're really willing to take the chance and that you realise that this will probably cause even more suffering.

 

I suspect that my ex suffers from bipolar disorder (because her mother had it). She's usually really clingy, but suddenly tranformed into a evil monster. If she is bipolar, things might be ok with proper medication. Yes, I realise I'm still in the denial phase, but her mother broke off all contact with her family, so it's not impossible that the same thing is happening to her.

 

The thing is, I don't think that she would contact me even if she missed me deeply. She knows that all my family and friends are really angry. They were also involved in her life, so basically she dumped them as well. Even if she could patch up things with me, she would have a hard time looking them in the eyes. I'd say her biggest fear is to not feel welcome.

 

Let's say I'm really willing to take the risk. Could, let's say, a funny christmas card, preferably with some short inside joke, hurt the chances of getting back together, or is it possible that it would create holiday nostalgia and make her miss me more?

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You said it yourSelf, you weren't the most happiest person with her.

 

So you were content.

 

That's no way to live.

 

So once again, be excited for the next chapter, because the person you'll end up with, you will be the happiest person in the world.

 

 

 

Barky

 

 

Really dont know where is this going.. I'm totally down. i really dont know how to move on with this. I'm down and gone.

 

No emotions, no words to explain.

 

This has hit me and i'm really low with myself. I have started to face the dawnfall and i feel that i'm going down day by day.

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Barky, you can't be more right. After my break up, I had reasons not to stay with her because she cheated. I know I wasn't the perfect BF but still that should never be an option for someone to do. Anyways, I know it was a mistake so I wanted to get back with her. She didn't though, she said it wasn't the right time and that she needed to take care of herself. Eventually, I said F it then go ahead. 4 months later I get text saying if we can meet up to talk? I completely erased her from all outlets and stood strong with NC. If she didn't want to talk to me then I'm done trying to make it work. Funny how she now says that she thought she can take care of herself and try to move on but she said that couldn't stop thinking about me and was creeping my family members on FB. NC worked for the best, were taking it slow but not counting all my chickens. I need her show some effort in order for me to give it back.

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