wants another man but can't go about getting him

[pet]

Hi, I am have been a relationship with my boyfriend for 3 years and am also in love with another guy for that period of years also. But I love the other guy more than my boyfriend, I made the wrong decision when I chose my boyfriend instead of this other guy and wish I did not.

 

I see this other guy sometimes and when we meet it is like chemistry between us. I love him so much. My boyfriend is a very jealous person and does not like this other guy and I am afraid to leave him as it would devastate him as he doesn't like this other guy. I want to start a life with this guy, he also too but I don't know how to go about it

 

My boyfriend often gets an attitude when I want to go out with my girlfriends and swears at me for no reason please tell me why I am putting up with this.This other guy is so understanding and kind and has a very good job. I love him so much.Help before its too late.

[ashesmum]

First of all, shame on you for having two at one time! As for your boyfriend acting jealous, you gave him the reason to act that way. You need to just come out and tell him that you want to end the relationship. As for the other guy, keep it on a down low for a while and then slowly come out with him. You really should've told your boyfriend in the beginning instead of being selfish. Good luck.

Hi, I am have been a relationship with my boyfriend for 3 years and am also in love with another guy for that period of years also. But I love the other guy more than my boyfriend, I made the wrong decision when I chose my boyfriend instead of this other guy and wish I did not.

 

I see this other guy sometimes and when we meet it is like chemistry between us. I love him so much. My boyfriend is a very jealous person and does not like this other guy and I am afraid to leave him as it would devastate him as he doesn't like this other guy. I want to start a life with this guy, he also too but I don't know how to go about it My boyfriend often gets an attitude when I want to go out with my girlfriends and swears at me for no reason please tell me why I am putting up with this.This other guy is so understanding and kind and has a very good job. I love him so much.Help before its too late.

[camille]

You've been in a relationship with your boyfriend for 3 years, and during this time, you've been in love with someone else. You currently love this other guy more than your boyfriend. So why are you still with your boyfriend?

 

It's no wonder he's jealous...he probably senses that your heart isn't totally with him OR that you're interested in someone else.

 

What the heck is stopping you from ending things with your boyfriend and being with this other guy? I don't think it's fair or honest to be with someone that you don't really love/or don't love as much as someone else...do you?

 

What's keeping you from ending things with your boyfriend?

 

camille

[Tony T]

1. Realize what a jerk your boyfriend is.

 

2. Realize that you made a mistake and you love another man much more. Realize that you have completely wasted three years of your life with someone you really didn't want to be with. Cut your losses NOW.

 

3. Realize how irrational it is to stay with someone you don't want to be with because leaving him would devastate him because he doesn't like the guy you want to be with. (Your own words from your post) DUH!!!! What planet do you live on???

 

4. Tell your jerky, scumbag, immature, jealous boyfriend that you are dissatisfied with the relationship and you no longer want to participate in it. Wish him the very best. Give him a hug. If you fear he will be violent, have a police officer standing by a short distance away to save you should that happen.

 

If there's a way you can make this friendly, that would be nice. Under NO circumstances should you tell him it is your intention to see this other guy. If he asks, tell him you are confused and right now you just need some time alone.

 

5. If you fear his jealousy will get really bad and he will stalk you, go to court and get a peace bond or an injunction barring him from coming near you.

 

6. Collect all your things from his place of residence. Make sure you get EVERYTHING because you don't ever want to come back. If he wants anything back that he has given you, glady give it to him NO QUESTIONS ASKED. It may be best to have one or more girlfriends there with you to help you.

 

7. Call the guy you really love and tell him you are free to date him. Don't get real serious real fast. Go slowly at first. If you dive into it full force very quickly, I promise it will blow up in your face. Understand that the fondness you have had for each other for the past three years has been partly based on your unavailability. People love what they can't have.

 

8. Don't be devastated if your new love doesn't want you once you're free to be with him. At least you will be away from someone you don't want to be with and you can start your life anew.

 

I do hope all this works out for you. Follow these steps, be absolutely strong and firm in all of them, don't let your current boyfriend try to talk you out of anything and don't let him give you any crap...just get away.

[Deejette]

It is not a good thing to stay with someone out of fear of their reactions. You will be walking on eggshells your whole life out of fear that you will set him off. Be free to pursue the one you love and let your current boyfriend find someone better suited for him.

1. Realize what a jerk your boyfriend is.

 

2. Realize that you made a mistake and you love another man much more. Realize that you have completely wasted three years of your life with someone you really didn't want to be with. Cut your losses NOW. 3. Realize how irrational it is to stay with someone you don't want to be with because leaving him would devastate him because he doesn't like the guy you want to be with. (Your own words from your post) DUH!!!! What planet do you live on???

 

4. Tell your jerky, scumbag, immature, jealous boyfriend that you are dissatisfied with the relationship and you no longer want to participate in it. Wish him the very best. Give him a hug. If you fear he will be violent, have a police officer standing by a short distance away to save you should that happen. If there's a way you can make this friendly, that would be nice. Under NO circumstances should you tell him it is your intention to see this other guy. If he asks, tell him you are confused and right now you just need some time alone. 5. If you fear his jealousy will get really bad and he will stalk you, go to court and get a peace bond or an injunction barring him from coming near you. 6. Collect all your things from his place of residence. Make sure you get EVERYTHING because you don't ever want to come back. If he wants anything back that he has given you, glady give it to him NO QUESTIONS ASKED. It may be best to have one or more girlfriends there with you to help you. 7. Call the guy you really love and tell him you are free to date him. Don't get real serious real fast. Go slowly at first. If you dive into it full force very quickly, I promise it will blow up in your face. Understand that the fondness you have had for each other for the past three years has been partly based on your unavailability. People love what they can't have. 8. Don't be devastated if your new love doesn't want you once you're free to be with him. At least you will be away from someone you don't want to be with and you can start your life anew. I do hope all this works out for you. Follow these steps, be absolutely strong and firm in all of them, don't let your current boyfriend try to talk you out of anything and don't let him give you any crap...just get away.