Nervous Nervous Nervous I Think This Is It

[Leigh 87]

Fine then.

 

I'll slow things down.

 

I'll focus on seeing my friends more than him.

 

I got carried away. We are really into each other, and for the right reasons too. Neither of us seek out or crave relationships.

 

We just met and have a big urge to keep seeing each other.

 

I won't fight against my urges but I guess I will tone it down.

 

I still believe you know when there is potential for great things.

 

More importantly, I know I could be wrong about him.

[Leigh 87]

Bobalot- thank you so much for your kind words. I certainly know that I'm not every guys cup of tea, so it is really nice of u to say those nice things about me. I know I'm not attractive to most men, but there always tends to be some out there who think I'm very attractive.

 

I only hope to find partners who are really attracted to me. At the end of the day, I only want one guy. I don't need all or most men to think I'm ' hot ' .... I love how attracted to me this guy is. It is really nice to be liked for my personality as well as my physical appearance.

 

When I first talk to a guy in a social setting, I feel they are more drawn to me for what I say and how I present myself: which I am positive and friendly. And funny to a lot of people.

 

This guy did take me out. He spent all Sunday with me. Paid for my movie, lunch and dinner.

 

He said he loves to just be around me.

 

 

 

About your ex..... did you break up with her?

 

I was fine talking to my ex. I didn't want him back or think of him in a romantic way after some time elapsed.

 

It's just when you meet someone you're really keen on, it will be disrespectful to have any ties with your ex.

 

Especially if she's hot:lmao: that would make a new girl feel even worse about you still talking to your ex.

 

I want to talk to my ex one day. In a few months. He does not understand why I had to tell him of my situation and therefore why I had to cut contact with him..

 

He just thought there was no issue with him talking to me every few days. With him being overly affectionate.

 

I mention my ex and my former fwb because I am fond of them both yet I feel I am at the stage where I should cut my ex off entirely and stop seeing my ex fwb for a while.

 

Since I wouldn't want new guy hanging or talking with an ex he was once really close to. Or talking to a very hot fwb he most recently screwed.

[Leigh 87]

Bingo! Love ya T!

 

And please don't read her comment as an attack on you. Lots and lots of folks have self-esteem issues; myself included. Thats why there are therapists and 2 trillion self help books!

 

What we are saying is "It's OK", recognize it, work on when and if you can, or chose to, have fun along the way.

 

And, speaking from a mans point of view, don't tell this man why you are so happy, why you are so greaat, or try to justify it to him..it will push him away. Let him "SEE" how happy you are and what a great person you are; you don't have to sell it to him. I had a 3rd date with a woman once where that is all she talked about; everything about h er that was great and why don't men see it. I could not say "check please" quick enough.

 

I recently bumped into her as we have mutual friends. She asked me why I never called her back again...

 

 

 

Hahaha omg.

 

How funny about that women you wanted to escape from.

 

No way do I tell guys how. ..... awesome I am. Lol?! I mean. I say it in defense here when I feel people don't believe I could actually find a guy who is the real deal; crazy about me and with the capacity to fall in love with me.

 

I most certainly don't need to tell this guy how...... great I am. Lol. He already thinks it. I truly feel I'm with someone who thinks I'm amazing for being me; not because I'm actually that I great.

[pteromom]

Fine then.

 

I'll slow things down.

 

I'll focus on seeing my friends more than him.

 

I got carried away. We are really into each other, and for the right reasons too. Neither of us seek out or crave relationships.

 

We just met and have a big urge to keep seeing each other.

 

I won't fight against my urges but I guess I will tone it down.

 

I still believe you know when there is potential for great things.

 

More importantly, I know I could be wrong about him.

 

I think it is cute that you are so excited about him. And yes, of course you are beautiful and worthy of love.

 

My only fear is that if he doesn't turn out to be who you hope he is, the higher up you soar, the further you'll have to fall.

 

Enjoy the feelings you are having. Have fun getting to know him. Just don't hand him your heart on a silver platter until you know for sure that *he* is worthy of *you*.

 

I am not at all doubting that you are both very attracted to each other. I'm sure that's true. But he may still have some major issues that you do not yet see, which may make him unsuitable as a partner. Just keep your eyes open and keep your head and heart in balance.

[Star Gazer]

Leigh, you've gone on and on and on about how awesome you are... But where's the discussion about why this guy you've known for 3-4 days is deserving of your adoration and certainty?

[Leigh 87]

I think it is cute that you are so excited about him. And yes, of course you are beautiful and worthy of love.

 

My only fear is that if he doesn't turn out to be who you hope he is, the higher up you soar, the further you'll have to fall.

 

Enjoy the feelings you are having. Have fun getting to know him. Just don't hand him your heart on a silver platter until you know for sure that *he* is worthy of *you*.

 

I am not at all doubting that you are both very attracted to each other. I'm sure that's true. But he may still have some major issues that you do not yet see, which may make him unsuitable as a partner. Just keep your eyes open and keep your head and heart in balance.

 

 

 

 

Thanks:)

 

I also truly loved my ex. It was unreal for me when he left. But I'm fine now. I am not afraid of feeling that pain again. I know it gets better.

 

Any seemingly blissful relationship can crash and burn. Or slowly fade out.

 

Nothing is necessarily for ever.

 

I feel like I'm ready to enjoy this exciting experience for what it is. I'll deal with any disappointes. I'll be fine even if things don't work out. Which, statistically speaking, they probably won't:lmao:

[Ruby Slippers]

Leigh, you've gone on and on and on about how awesome you are... But where's the discussion about why this guy you've known for 3-4 days is deserving of your adoration and certainty?

He makes her feel beautiful and special.

 

One of the two FWBs I had in the past - this is exactly what he did, with joy and enthusiasm. It was a short, sexy fling that totally brought me back to life. Seriously, I feel like my short time with that guy pulled me from black and white land, back to full color land. I'm very thankful to him for that.

 

Sometimes a girl just needs to be adored. It doesn't have to "mean anything" or go anywhere. It can just be.

[Leigh 87]

Leigh, you've gone on and on and on about how awesome you are... But where's the discussion about why this guy you've known for 3-4 days is deserving of your adoration and certainty?

 

 

 

Oh. He isn't yet. I just really like him so far.

 

I realize that could change!

 

Fow now, I can see myself really enjoying him. It he disappoints me, I won't stay with him.

 

I can now see it's much better to leave a guy who doesn't deserve u rather than stay with them because you're in love. I made that mistake with my ex. I am now glad he ended it. thrilled he ended it.

[Star Gazer]

Oh. He isn't yet. I just really like him so far.

 

I realize that could change!

 

Fow now, I can see myself really enjoying him. It he disappoints me, I won't stay with him.

 

I can now see it's much better to leave a guy who doesn't deserve u rather than stay with them because you're in love. I made that mistake with my ex. I am now glad he ended it. thrilled he ended it.

 

Again: Why are you so into him, Leigh? Spell it out. Why do you like him so much?

 

Is it because he's so into you? I think it is, because you haven't said anything (that I've seen, could have missed it) about the qualities this guy possesses that makes you like him so much.

[Star Gazer]

He makes her feel beautiful and special.

 

One of the two FWBs I had in the past - this is exactly what he did, with joy and enthusiasm. It was a short, sexy fling that totally brought me back to life. Seriously, I feel like my short time with that guy pulled me from black and white land, back to full color land. I'm very thankful to him for that.

 

Sometimes a girl just needs to be adored. It doesn't have to "mean anything" or go anywhere. It can just be.

 

Your experience is different than "just knowing it's right" and "this is it" and "he's re real deal," as Leigh has been saying throughout this thread.

[Leigh 87]

He makes her feel beautiful and special.

 

One of the two FWBs I had in the past - this is exactly what he did, with joy and enthusiasm. It was a short, sexy fling that totally brought me back to life. Seriously, I feel like my short time with that guy pulled me from black and white land, back to full color land. I'm very thankful to him for that.

 

Sometimes a girl just needs to be adored. It doesn't have to "mean anything" or go anywhere. It can just be.

 

 

 

I love this post.

 

My recent fwb also quiet adored me. He was just lovely.

 

My ex had love for me but not in the way I deserve.

 

Lately, I have sought out and attracted guys who genuinely adore me in a way I wasn't accustomed to.

 

The new guy has told me that I'm amazing. Just through he way I talk with him and others. As well as the fact he is attracted to me.

 

I grew up overweight with pimples and crooked teeth. Its nice to be slim and have sexy guys who pay me attention.

 

However, this guy makes me feel good about who I am. I love how I make him happy.

[Imajerk17]

Again: Why are you so into him, Leigh? Spell it out. Why do you like him so much?

 

Is it because he's so into you? I think it is, because you haven't said anything (that I've seen, could have missed it) about the qualities this guy possesses that makes you like him so much.

 

Yep. I asked her that question too. At least, how soon was it that she "knew". I mean, her FWB adored her and I am assuming made her feel good for whom she was.

 

Any answer is OK. Some of us have an archetype that is rare and when we meet that rare someone who actually fits that archetype we fall for that person.

 

The thing that kind of stumps me though, is that she talks a lot more about how great her FWB was a lot more than what makes this guy so great.

[Star Gazer]

I love this post.

 

My recent fwb also quiet adored me. He was just lovely.

 

My ex had love for me but not in the way I deserve.

 

Lately, I have sought out and attracted guys who genuinely adore me in a way I wasn't accustomed to.

 

The new guy has told me that I'm amazing. Just through he way I talk with him and others. As well as the fact he is attracted to me.

 

I grew up overweight with pimples and crooked teeth. Its nice to be slim and have sexy guys who pay me attention.

 

However, this guy makes me feel good about who I am. I love how I make him happy.

 

This is what I thought, and it's very sad.

 

You can't identify one thing about him as an individual that you like, appreciate, value, find attractive, other than how he validates you by tell you awesome things about yourself?

[Leigh 87]

Again: Why are you so into him, Leigh? Spell it out. Why do you like him so much?

 

Is it because he's so into you? I think it is, because you haven't said anything (that I've seen, could have missed it) about the qualities this guy possesses that makes you like him so much.

 

 

 

Ohhhhhhhh@!!!

 

Wow. Well just loved the way we talked to each other. From the start.

 

I love the way he is.

 

I really love the way we talk to each other.

 

Every text or real life conversation is funny. Pretty much.

 

Oh Star. I very much like this guy.

 

The combination of his looks and personality.

 

I was just very drawn to him from our first conversation. He was positive, friendly and I wanted to keep talking to him.

 

I have been around a lot of guys. I am a social person.

 

I know when I'm legitimately into a boy. ...

[Treasa]

 

I still believe you know when there is potential for great things.

 

More importantly, I know I could be wrong about him.

 

I think what everyone is trying to say is that it's way too soon for you to know. You could be right, you could be wrong. Now isn't the time to be thinking about it.

[xxoo]

From the opening post, it sounded like the attraction was based on incredible sexual chemistry.

[Leigh 87]

This is what I thought, and it's very sad.

 

You can't identify one thing about him as an individual that you like, appreciate, value, find attractive, other than how he validates you by tell you awesome things about yourself?

 

 

 

No no no. Just no.

 

You're so far off...

 

I love the way he is.

 

He's generous, ambitious yet laid back and fun.

 

He is easy to be around.

 

Among many qualities about him I enjoy.

 

We have a spark. Everytime we talk.

 

I like the fact I make him happy. However, it is definitely a two way street here....

[Leigh 87]

From the opening post, it sounded like the attraction was based on incredible sexual chemistry.

 

 

 

No no no.

 

I just enjoyed talking to him so much. I liked the way he spoke with me, plainly. I can't really articulate why I especially enjoyed talking to him more than I have with other guys.

 

It just flowed. The conversation.

 

I have not felt that as much with any other guys.

[Leigh 87]

There's nothing sad about this.

 

He lights me up in a way that is rare to find. I'm almost 27. I have talked to a lot of guys.

 

It is really hard to explain his appeal. Basically, when we start talking we don't seem to want to stop.

 

I can't explain it any clearer than that.

 

I was not trying to find someone. I just couldn't stop talking to this guy. He had..... his smiled through his eyes.

 

I got a very nice feeling from him. That I lacked with other guys.

[Leigh 87]

On smartphone sorry for mistakes.

 

I meant: he smiled through his eyes.

 

Yes I liked his eyes lol. But I liked them for reasons beyond the asthetic. The combination of the way we talked, the way he smile coupled with his happy demenour and his eyes which smiled with him.

 

You're asking for a laundry list of the qualities which I like about him? Well like I said... his generous, social, ambitious yet down to earth.

[Lansing]

What are all of these comments about photos referring too? Are these photos that you sent to him or photos up here somewhere? I am confused by what these photos are.

[Leigh 87]

What are all of these comments about photos referring too? Are these photos that you sent to him or photos up here somewhere? I am confused by what these photos are.

 

 

 

 

I put a picture of myself up because I was asking a question in the fitness section. Pertaining to my physical state.

 

I don't go sending guys such pictures.

[Star Gazer]

I put a picture of myself up because I was asking a question in the fitness section. Pertaining to my physical state.

 

I don't go sending guys such pictures.

 

The state of your bedroom concerns me more than this thread.

[forgetmenot75]

Leigh, you need to calm down and close your legs. There's no way a guy would be interested in you if the first thing you're offering to him is sex. I've read about your first date with him and almost feel sad and embarrassed for you. Please, calm down, see a therapist and stay alone for a while. You sometimes give great advice, but your post about yourself are just too much, you are in a constant excitement state, and it's not healthy.

[Leigh 87]

Leigh, you need to calm down and close your legs. There's no way a guy would be interested in you if the first thing you're offering to him is sex. I've read about your first date with him and almost feel sad and embarrassed for you. Please, calm down, see a therapist and stay alone for a while. You sometimes give great advice, but your post about yourself are just too much, you are in a constant excitement state, and it's not healthy.

 

 

 

Honey, just because you can't find a guy that is that into you..... it doesn't mean I have anything to be sad or embarrassed about.

 

It might be hard for you to have much faith on men. Given your last to guys and the fact they weren't that into you. Which, by the way I felt bad for you about.

 

Not all guys are bad.

 

When a guy is really into you, be won't care if you fool around on the first night you medt.

 

A guy who is genuinely interested wants to be with you irrespective of too early sex.

 

I'm sorry you haven't experienced a guy that really likes you.

 

I'm pretty sure my guy does quiet like me, so our first date was great.

 

Drop your condescending attitude and work on making yourself more likable.

 

Negatively is unattractive.

 

It is pretty off putting how u assume I should be embarrassed about meeting a guy; even more disgusting is the fact you discount the fact he is that into me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Our first date was wonderful. There's absolutely nothing to be sad or embarrassed about.