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My bestfriend told me he loves me. Should I believe him? But he has a gf.


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I've known my best guy friend for six years. We have never dated. Just hang out a lot, we talk about everything, we are always there for each other. About a year ago I noticed that he liked me a little more than being just friends. I have been in & out of relationships since our friendship. He on the other hand has been in an on & off relationship for 3 years. Anytime I go through a break up he has always been there to help me process my emotions & talk things through with me. I've helped him process things within his relationship. In the past year he has said things such as we could have been together but the timing wasnt right. I've always blowed it off. We have had sex within the past year maybe 5 times but that's all & a few times in previous years. He has cooked dinner for me, got upset if we went out and other guys talked to me, told me he loves my company & loves seeing me happy. He often times predicts the ending of my relationships & tells me that he knew I should not have been in such relationships. Well his girlfriend stays out of town & he always expresses his doubts abt her but something will happen that makes him change his mind & continue to be with her, they have broken up a few times in the past year & he has expressed it to me but I kind of blew it off, I was unavailable & had other things going on so I did not talk to him abt his recent break ups with her. Last week he asked me why i never tell him how I feel about him & I told him I don't see a point it's not like what I say will make him drop her to b with me & that I wouldn't want that. I rather he leave her on his own. (She has done some messed up things to him). So he tells me that if I expressed my true feelings towards him he would & still could leave her. Next thing I know out of the blue he tells me that I am one in a million & that he loves me. I attempted to have sex with him that night but he would not & instead told me that he just wanted me to spend the night & just lay next to him. Most of the time that's all he wants me to do & it depends on my mood whether I do it or not. Everytime he goes to see her he calls & talks to me before he gets there. I don't talk to him while he is there much, it's jus depends but wen he is on his way back he calls me so we can meet and hang out. I have not been able to get out of my mind the "I love you". I know through actions he shows me he cares & on his birthday he often spends it with me if I'm available. But could he really mean that he loves me and if he does why is he still with his girlfriend?

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PlumPrincess

I've met guys in relationships who gave me the impression that they were just looking for an external reason, another woman, to make them end their relationship. Sometimes the relationship was in a shaky phase, sometimes it was one of these on and off relationships. The last thing I would want is to get involved with any of these guys, especially the ones with the on and off relationship. They seem to be the worst. They're stuck somehow, scared and unhappy with themselves, it's not going to change until they deal with it, alone. See, he has already started to confuse you as well. Even when he is your friend, I would try to maintain a healthy distance from him, because he will only drag you into this mess with his girlfriend.

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yankees51988

I'm not gonna lie, it really seems like he genuinely likes you a lot. Since you are such good friends and always have been there for each other I'm sure you guys care about each other quite a bit.. maybe there has always been a little something there, but it sounds like you are the one he really wants to be with. That's a pretty meaningful thing to say, ya know, I don't think I'd say that to a chick unless I really, really liked her, and I am not even one for serious relationships or talking about my feelings, lol. Ya know, maybe you guys should actually give it a shot.

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