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after 3 months of NC, ex-boyfriend wrote me an email...


toteslittlelady

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toteslittlelady

so my ex & i have not spoken for 3 months, we ended things pretty bad. it has been exactly 3 months today since we have seen, talked, looked at each other. he settled for his ex for 2 months after we broke up... because he's an idiot & for a rebound. yesterday after i woke up from a nap, i saw my ex wrote me an email apologizing, that i didn't deserve what happened, he knows he **** up and the realized that i am a "gem of a woman" so he says. he said "he doesn't expect me to write back nor he knows if he would want me to" what should i do? what is he trying to say by "not knowing if he wants me to write back to him"? why or why not? I am surprised he wrote me, i do still feel something for him but i cannot go back there again.. unfortunately. any thoughts? help please!

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No point responding if you don't plan to go back to him. The grass probably isn't as green as he thought and now he's apologizing. People usually only apologize or realize that they've done wrong when they've hit a low point. I wouldn't respond or if I do, it would be "ok".

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If he wanted to get back together, why would he say that he didn't know if he wanted you to write back? I would suggest not responding. If you build up expectations that he wants to get back together and he actually doesn't, you might find yourself struggling again...

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We don't know why they do this, but they do. I also don't understand why they say the things they do, when they are already in a new relationship. When you think about it from the outside, it's a little gross.

 

I got practically the same email after after a bad breakup and the same amount of time had passed. Here's where you and I could do things differently, though. I wrote him back a pathetic email, against all advice on LS. Haven't heard anything since. Wish I had taken the advice on here and not responded at all. I think what they ultimately want is some assurance that you're still hung up on them. I certainly delivered on that. If you feel like you have to reply, then you do. But the advice to keep NC is good and for your own sanity.

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From my experience, it's best not to respond. Save yourself the future heartache and keep moving forward. I find that the trust has been broken it he needs to do more before you acknowledge him.

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I don't know the specifics of your relationship, but it could be he's just trying to make amends because it was bothering his conscience.

 

Regardless of what his motives are/were, I wouldn't write back. He's with someone else now so it's pointless. It may set you back on your recovery if you engage in what could be a series of back and forth emails.

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