wife had a pa and I informed husband

[BetrayedH]

It is still natural consequences because the cheaters own actions and misconduct placed them in a position to be fired. Contrary to the belief of selfish and entitled people" others should not have to suffer just so they can be comfortable. If they knew that getting it on at work could cost them their jobs than I guess they just should have kept it out of the workplace.

 

There's a technical term for this kind of behavior. I can't remember.

 

Oh, it's that they were DUMBASSES.

[tru]

Just about everyone agrees that cheating is bad and that we need to take steps to prevent unethical behaviour in the workplace against individuals who did not have an honor code.

[HopingAgain]

There's a technical term for this kind of behavior. I can't remember.

 

Oh, it's that they were DUMBASSES.

 

LOL! That about sums it up!

[Artie Lang]

That's right. NATURAL CONSEQUENCES. NOT the consequences this... person, decided upon. This person has NOTHING to do with this, yet felt it perfectly acceptable to get in the middle of someone's life. You've no idea what the situation was. What if it was consensual? What if everyone involved knew? What if they didn't? NOW, he's made things miserable at work too? Where do you get off putting YOUR morals onto someone else??? BUTT OUT.

 

this whole thing would've been a dead issue, except the fact they brought their "situation" to the workplace. that video sealed their fate. granted, if these people had some kind of "agreement" in place, it's no one's business. but the minute they carried this over to the workplace, all bets are off. this is a public setting.

 

i mean, c'mon..... groping each other in the copy room? REALLY??? who wants to walk-in on that sh*t?!

[Artie Lang]

I would rather walk in on that, and laugh about it later

 

take a poll in your workplace and i bet you are in the minority. a company complies with what they and the majority of their workforce deems appropriate behavior.

[BetrayedH]

I would rather walk in on that, and laugh about it later, than to work next to OP and his/her bizarro behavior.

 

Perhaps if you put your arguments in ALL CAPS they'll be more convincing.

 

Betraying two spouses and defiantly putting it in front of people at work like a braggard is bound to have this result.

 

It isn't the OPs fault; it's theirs.

[tru]

I tolerated the behavior for a year check previous posts (yes there are alot of posts) but I tried to pass it off for along time before I broke. Do you think that had I talked to the cheaters it would have stopped them. As for hr I didn't have enough on them everything would've been circumstantial.

[Artie Lang]

ever heard the saying, "Don't sh*t where you eat?"

[BetrayedH]

Come on BH... I'm just stating my opinion. I'm entitled to that much. I hear what you all are saying. I just disagree. I'm sorry. I just do. I'm not saying that what they did at work was right, which is why I agreed it was out of line. I'm also saying that what OP did was for all the wrong reasons and was not the proper way to handle it. SO THERE!

 

Fair enough. I was being a bit snippy. My apologies for that. You are entitled to have and share your opinion (even when it's wrong). For the record, you got a laugh out of me.

 

I think I got the impression that the OP had endured seeing and listening to their affair for a year, not that he plotted revenge for a year. I'm sure that my status as a fellow BH colors my view. I have little patience for this crap and when people want to be bold and arrogant about their affairs, they have this kind of result coming to them.

[tru]

We'll know innately the sense of deriding shame and guilt for having concealed such a wrong

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6152159

[Red Wolverine]

ever heard the saying, "Don't sh*t where you eat?"

 

Don't get your honey where you get your money?

[tru]

yes I'm divorcee a couple of years ago I walked into our home and my wife's fb account was open. What shocked me was that she was on the om page there was a pic of her licking his navel, plus a video when I clicked on his video I saw her lips on his penis, and her head was bobbing away. Had no idea who this guy was or that he existed. Barely had time to see this stuff on her account. When she came barging in, at first she yelled at me for snooping. Then denied it was her even threatened to contact fb. I pleaded with her to contact fb to complain about being hacked she wouldn't. Apparently they had met at a house party. I was to boring to be invited over to her gf's home where this happened.

[Journee]

Sorry, these kids parents are the ones responsible for what happens to their family. If they cared, they would have conducted themselves like decent human beings.

 

Wow, just wow. Now its not the cheaters' fault that they screwed up their lives, its someone elses.

 

Right.

 

Just as if they were participating in any other activity that goes against company policy or guidelines. Anytime one engages in any sort of behavior that can put their job in jeopardy is a risk. Folks hate analogies here so I won't bother but here is saying that applies to many situations..." rules is rules".

 

You can do whatever you want to in this world just be ready for the consequences.

[tru]

Riiiight. OP has NO culpability in getting two people fired. Psht. Astounding...

just one question are you involved in gang activity. Appears that you have a snitches get stitches mentality.

[IfWishesWereHorses]

Riiiight. OP has NO culpability in getting two people fired. Psht. Astounding...

 

The company fired them for violating policy. Had he reported them for stealing, using company vehicles for personal use, fudging on expense reports, etc... HE would have still been responsible for their termination?

[jlola]

just one question are you involved in gang activity. Appears that you have a snitches get stitches mentality.

 

Not gang mentality. People who cheat mentality. This is why WS and OW can carry on an affair for so long. You cannot have an OW/OM who is willing to confront your spouse. It just is not happening. So you have to find someone you can either brainwash into thinking confronting the Bs with the facts of the affair is being a snitch and that is bad.

 

i told this story before. But I ill say it again to point out the logic starts young. I was with my little niece when she came over crying and telling me a little girl hit her. I went over to this 4 year old and asked if she hit my niece. She kept refusing to answe the question. Only kept saying "My mother says not to tattle". Even when I asked her if her mother did not also tell her not to hit, she kept focusing on the tattling. I then told her she is NOT to hit and it is wrong and she is not to hit my niece again.

 

She is not being taught to accept the consequences of her actions. But to focus on the wrong she thinks is being done to her. I would hate to be around any person who teaches their children this illogical way of thinking. Do not do the crime if you can't do the time. And we all know and I agree 100% to with the quote "don't **** where you eat". If you cannot understand this by now, perhaps facing consequences ill have you use gain some emotional maturity ,boundaries and impulse control.

 

To carry on at work like teenagers is not what you were hired to do.

[jlola]

I think OP did the 2 love birds a favor. They were both so unhappy in their marriages they had to carry on a LTA. Now they will be forced to stop cake eating. Overcome all obstacles so they can finally be together and give their BS's a chance to meet someone who respects them and does not make a fool of them.

[tru]

in the work place there is a philosophy that good ppl win, why because if you don't screw me I won't screw (we are talking about following company policy)you. Ppl who work for the "man" have sense of ownership even though they don't own the company. When someone corrupt enters the work and brakes policy everything crumples. Trust is lost and anarchy is the result. Everybody at work agrees that company policy mustn't be compromised there is a provision for whistle blowers. Which is why I was not fired. Not one person at work is against whistleblowers anymore than you or I should be against cameras. Do you see a problem with a camera is a camera responsible for two ppl getting fired?

[GorillaTheater]

I can't believe you asked me if I was in a gang. Jesus. Grow up.

 

At least he didn't ask you if you wore a pink shirt.

 

Normally, I'd be one of the folks arguing your points, but I can't take this story seriously.

[road]

The company fired them for violating policy. Had he reported them for stealing, using company vehicles for personal use, fudging on expense reports, etc... HE would have still been responsible for their termination?

 

No.

 

Their behavior got them fired.

[HopingAgain]

Why are you more worried about him blowing the whisle as opposed to their behavior in the first place?

 

Because most cheaters are always worried about being outed, embarrased, or facing ANY type of consequences related to their affairs. Always!

[It-is-what-it-is.]

I think it's bullsh*t that everyone thinks they can be the morality police. That's why. Why are you worried about what perfect strangers are doing in bed? Exactly. It doesn't matter to you. It shouldn't matter to OP. OP is not married to either of these people. Oooh, poor baby had to hear them giggle at work. LMAO! What a joke.

 

One of the things that astounds me is how completely naive it is to assume that people don't talk, or that they intend to mind their own business.

 

That is just hysterical. Nobody minds their own business...maybe they don't go right up to the BS and purposefully tell them, but they tell them stuff which outs the affair anyway. People notice, people see and hear and there are tons of people like OP who feel that because the affair is within their midst that not saying something is condoning. People who have affairs...and choose to do so in public places roll the dice. That is on them and nobody else, you cannot expect people to hold to your moral code, whatever it is.

 

Frankly the OP, and his workmates probably suffered in silence while this affair progressed. People notice, people talk, people get the sexual vibe, and it pisses them off when it is done at work.

 

Should he have gone to HR? Yeah probably,but he probably just got slapped with the deception and made a spur of the moment decision at that party.

 

Another thing...OP didn't call HR, which meant someone else did...either AP(OM/OW) to complain or a coworker. Just sayin.

 

IIWII

[ChristopherRobin]

I think it's bullsh*t that everyone thinks they can be the morality police. That's why. Why are you worried about what perfect strangers are doing in bed? Exactly. It doesn't matter to you. It shouldn't matter to OP. OP is not married to either of these people. Oooh, poor baby had to hear them giggle at work. LMAO! What a joke.

 

Because practically anyone in that situation would want to be told. The only reason I can think of for you to justify not telling someone they are being cheated on is if you yourself have something to hide that you would not want to be outed.

 

Morality police has nothing to do with it. It is common knowledge that getting cheated on sucks, and it should be discouraged.

 

If someone is about to get hit by a bus, should you just let it happen because they are a stranger to you, their pain means nothing to you, and you aren't "traffic police"?

[ChristopherRobin]

I disagree, I feel it's everyone's business. We all have to look out for each other. But I'll leave it at that since everyone is entitled to their own opinions and I have voiced my disagreement.

[Ebelskiver]

Come on Tru.....I think you may need some continued counseling to resolve the issues of your own experience. You inserted yourself into peoples lives and personal business and now justify your actions with excuses of workplace disruption. If that were true, a single complaint to HR would have sufficed. Instead you stalked, connived, interfered, and ruined lives.......for YOUR purposes. No one elses. For all you know the husband was in on it. He could be a cuckold......again, NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.

 

Your pompous effusions of morality, imposing your ideas of what is right and wrong on others who may not share your ideals, is your way of punishing your wife for what she did to you. It is that latent anger that you need to deal with.

 

All the justification in the world for what you did does not make it right.....How cheaters aren't good for the workplace (guess what....there are other cheaters in the workplace-you just don't know who they are), how the lack of morality sickens you (so you're perfect?). Quit judging. Keep your own side of the street clean and leave others alone.