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Posted

i promise to my soul if she increases her calls for bad intensions breadcrumps etc i will file a restrain order it costs only like 60 euro i think.....

Posted

She will either:Give up and come to terms

Or

Stalk the crap out of you

Pay no mind to either one and continue to move along with your life.

  • Like 2
  • Author
Posted

i just keep not existing for her......

  • Author
Posted (edited)

and the red flags i wasnt able to recognize were

 

,she was blaming me of the mistakes and behaviors of others that relate somehow to me.

 

,she could go from super hot to cold and in previous small break ups she would go from pushing me away to pulling me close again like a switch.

 

 

,she was adapting and calibrating her personality and behavior differently each time with each individual in her life (i was curious how she could do that and felt betrayed as she was playing theatre towards me at the time)

 

,she wouldnt talk about what bothered her but she would swallow it in the name of my love and care then she would break it of suddently like a bubble.

 

,she was playing the victim with her ex and the ex believe me was a good boy , she also blamed him for many things .....

 

,she was winning strangers attention and companion and would be open to them immediatly and talk to them as she knew them years. that was strange to me and i was describing it to my self as at her is just nice.

 

,she was extremely selfish..

 

,her parents family had function difficulties...

there are more but i need time to summarize,,,i want to thank user Downtown for his wise posts .. they really helped me decode and picture the tragedy i was in.....

Edited by hurts2death
  • Author
Posted

regarding her BPD which i didnt recognize this time she crossed all the lines and she called hidden number 04:55...

 

thank god i had it silent profile..(you cant block a hidden number)

 

 

.

 

 

now on me,,,

 

i feel more stable... my workouts are skyrocketing and my calmness is very good.. my thoughts are almost all on my carreer.

 

i hope i am about to exit this hell...i wish i wont have any setback i am almost there.

  • Author
Posted

i am sure she has it. she is from + to - from hot to cold and has all the traits...yes what you say is correct even experienced psychologists find it difficult to find it about bpd....

 

i have my time...but for me is better to be single...more time to improve...more time for me...all for me..feels great..i take flirts but no no no no relationship...i have to improve many things before touching it again. it sets you back cause it consumes energy and i am not this kind of man to neglect my partner....when i love i do it fully....

 

 

You can't diagnose her with BPD, only a psychologist can do that. It is more likely that is she is the same age as you and had limited experience in relationships, that she is simply immature. And she's allowed to be. It takes lots of time and experience to handle a break up correctly.

 

With regards to yourself, be careful that you are not stunting your healing by posting here. Maybe it's time to consider going out on a date, to truly put it behind you?

  • Author
Posted

ok here i am. its been a short ime . i am getting on with my life but its sth i am experiencing ...

when i hear to romance songs sometimes i cry fastly and its out of control...

 

its like i am developing a split personality...

 

99% of time i am over her and 1% of time i cry like a @$#$

 

btw she didnt try to contact again....

  • Author
Posted

nice

 

i have just started receiving blocked number calls at my house...

 

i didt think and i answered cause its hidden number when my sister call from overseas....

 

as soon as i said yes she hanged up...

 

is this breaking of nc?

 

also is it normal for a dumper of 3 y rl to breadcrump so rough?

Posted
nice

 

i have just started receiving blocked number calls at my house...

 

i didt think and i answered cause its hidden number when my sister call from overseas....

 

as soon as i said yes she hanged up...

 

is this breaking of nc?

 

also is it normal for a dumper of 3 y rl to breadcrump so rough?

 

 

My ex and I were together for 3 years, and he breadcrumbed the hell out of me. Just depends on the ex. Some drop off the face of the earth.

  • Author
Posted

akmost a week breadcrump free...i would still want to be with her but i understand that after the dumping she performed on me that would be catastrophic....

Posted

See a therapist mate. Ive read this from start to finish and i think more people will empathiase with her at the moment. Get talking to a professional. Quick and maybe some anti depressents? Take care. Haydn

  • Like 3
  • Author
Posted

thanks friend but no i am not touching antidepressants......

 

my therapy involves some counselling and work outs and helping others.....

 

weird but since the break up i dont feel emotional pain over little things...i am somehow iron hearted.... lol

  • Author
Posted

just an update i feel better when i keep my self occupied...i experienced some sort of relapse but thank god it ended soon..

  • Author
Posted

just came from the appointment with the counsellor....

 

everything went great ...

 

we also aranged to go for drinks soon...

 

she is some kind cute..

 

i think my testosterone and dht boost from my workout routine are exploding my libido .i will be a rapist if they dont normalize....

 

when i notice a hot girl i get like fire inside me and my ex is 0%

Posted

Your counsellor agreed to go on a date with you? You need to find a new counsellor that understands professionalism and the client-patient relationship.

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted

no no date ,only drinks...should i avoid?

Your counsellor agreed to go on a date with you? You need to find a new counsellor that understands professionalism and the client-patient relationship.
Posted
no no date ,only drinks...should i avoid?

 

Counsellors are not supposed to have any relationship with their clients outside of the patient-client realm. That is highly unprofessional of your counsellor.

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted

well i agree what you say but i didnt atain her as a to cure me...

 

you know .. i used yo know her somehow...

 

but my friends on loveshack tell me what you think cause i feel weird..

 

 

my days are Maria free and i have targets in life ...but when she got somehow close to me(the consellor) i smelled her and a series of pics of Maria run through my head in a sec......

 

is it possible that the dump she did to me leaves a trauma?

 

(3 months nc)

Posted

I know i am in pain but you should not do this to yourself. Take care. See a real therapist please.

  • Like 1
Posted

I'm not sure I understand your post as it is in broken English.. But I get the sense your "counsellor" is someone you knew previously in a social sense?

 

You need to attend a true, real therapist- someone you don't know at all, that you will hold no other relationship with other than as a patient, for the express purpose of healing.

 

It is essential with the symptoms you've described on here.. It's not a sign of weakness it is a sign of strength.

  • Author
Posted

i have control of things...

 

yes she is someone i barely knew , sorry for my bad english.

 

i would like to but i also thought that since i somehow knew her she would help better maybe?

Posted

Get rid of your "counselor"

  • Like 1
Posted

Its a bit strange this thread? I hope you find what you need. But quit with her, i know its horrible but try. Take care. haydn

Posted
i have control of things...

 

yes she is someone i barely knew , sorry for my bad english.

 

i would like to but i also thought that since i somehow knew her she would help better maybe?

 

No because they carry in preconceived biases of you. A real counselor is someone who has no relationship with you. Psychotherapy is not just 'talking or listening'. Psychotherapy is a healing tool if done properly. The therapeutic relationship needs to be held therapeutic otherwise the harm towards the client is even bigger. It cannot be friendship.

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