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I think I have feelings for my best friend :-/


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I am a female and he is a male. We have been good friends for about 6-7 years but have been spending more time together this summer than we ever have before. We talk every single day and have been seeing each other at least a couple times a week and lately I've been spending the night at his house, sleeping in bed together and everything. We tell each other we miss and love each other all the time but we have never flirted or openly expressed any feelings more than friends for each other. I am so confused because sometimes I feel like I like him more than a friend. Sometimes I even fantasize/wish that when we are laying in bed about to go to sleep he would just wrap his arm around me and hold me... but nope no contact whatsoever. Bur then again I know I would totally freak out if he actually did that because I'm scared that if we ever did become romantic with each other we'd lose this amazing friendship that we have right now. I'm also wondering if he is secretly dealing with the same battle with feelings for me. He makes me feel special when he tells me I'm the only person he would do this and that for, but other than that he has never indicated to me that he may have feelings for me. What do you think I should do? Has anyone dealt with a similar situation? What did you do and how did it turn out?

 

Thank you! :)

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I am a female and he is a male. We have been good friends for about 6-7 years but have been spending more time together this summer than we ever have before. We talk every single day and have been seeing each other at least a couple times a week and lately I've been spending the night at his house, sleeping in bed together and everything. We tell each other we miss and love each other all the time but we have never flirted or openly expressed any feelings more than friends for each other. I am so confused because sometimes I feel like I like him more than a friend. Sometimes I even fantasize/wish that when we are laying in bed about to go to sleep he would just wrap his arm around me and hold me... but nope no contact whatsoever. Bur then again I know I would totally freak out if he actually did that because I'm scared that if we ever did become romantic with each other we'd lose this amazing friendship that we have right now. I'm also wondering if he is secretly dealing with the same battle with feelings for me. He makes me feel special when he tells me I'm the only person he would do this and that for, but other than that he has never indicated to me that he may have feelings for me. What do you think I should do? Has anyone dealt with a similar situation? What did you do and how did it turn out?

 

Thank you! :)

 

To be frank with you, I think he may be of the exact same mindset as you, but too is making no indication of added feelings for you in fear of overstepping that mental boundary of anything more than best friends will ruin things.

 

In my opinion this is the most cruel thing any two people who genuinelly love each other, could do to each other; and by that I mean deny someone your heart that truly loves you and you truly love them. Dont be afraid of the possibility of things actually working out between you guys; you get on so well as friends, why not take a leap of faith and look at the positive potential of being a great couple than dooming the friendship 'bound to fail' based on a generilised fear.

 

As you both already respect each other, have a simple conversation about it. Dont be afraid to breach the subject by asking him if he has ever had the thought of you guys being more than just friends, and his thoughts on the matter. If his thoughts match yours, then will have no reason to doubt any longer and give your heart a rest. If his thoughts are not aligned with yours, at least you will know where you stand. As he is your friend first and foremost, he wont get defensive or weirded out by you asking the question. You're not total strangers :)

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