bentleychic Posted September 4, 2013 Share Posted September 4, 2013 I am curious how common this is. Someone posted that their WS gave their OW the wrong name. I cannot imagine this and it made me think they must not have been in contact on social media. MM and I actually initially reconnected on a message board that we originally met on years ago (totally legit, totally innocent, not a meet up site or anything) and then he clicked on my facebook link and asked if he could friend me there. We've been friends ever since. I'll comment on some of the stuff he posts or "like" things. I don't do anything that I wouldn't do on any of my casual friends pages. He does on mine as well, but not nearly as much. I did ask for ground rules to begin with and he said there aren't any. I can post whatever I want. (Well, obviously not professions of love or anything like that! ) So just curious how many of you are connected to your MM/MW on social media. Link to post Share on other sites
underwater2010 Posted September 4, 2013 Share Posted September 4, 2013 Just a forewarning....Facebook is where I figured out something was goin on. Not all the details, but it did cause me to dig further. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author bentleychic Posted September 4, 2013 Author Share Posted September 4, 2013 I'm not worried on that end. She met me when he did the first time years ago and she knows we're friends and that we reconnected last year. (She saw when he friended me and asked if it was me. (I've lost 60lbs since they saw me last years ago and look very different.)) We do not interact on there as anything other than friends. I'm actually a lot friendlier/more familiar with OTHER people on face book than I am with him. Link to post Share on other sites
LilGirlandOW Posted September 4, 2013 Share Posted September 4, 2013 I'm not, neither of them are on fb. Link to post Share on other sites
Author bentleychic Posted September 4, 2013 Author Share Posted September 4, 2013 I should say that I am NOT friends with his W on facebook. I hope it didn't sound like I meant that. I'm a very lovey person to my close fb friends. It's not odd for me to post ILY's and lovey/affectionate encouragement on my close friend's pages. I don't do anything like that on his at all. I don't cold post anything on his page except happy birthday and get well type of stuff when he was in the hospital. Link to post Share on other sites
Speakingofwhich Posted September 4, 2013 Share Posted September 4, 2013 xMM and I've never been connected through social media. At this point we have no connection at all (except through our hearts!) Link to post Share on other sites
ladydesigner Posted September 4, 2013 Share Posted September 4, 2013 WH and MOW were connected on social media. On DDay I confronted her from his account. She has been blocked from both our accounts since then. Link to post Share on other sites
canuckprincess Posted September 4, 2013 Share Posted September 4, 2013 My mm doesn't use FB. I have mine open for all to see, I have nothing to hide. I however don't post pics of him and I on there because that's rubbing salt in a very deep wound. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sweet_pea Posted September 5, 2013 Share Posted September 5, 2013 My mm doesn't use FB. I have mine open for all to see, I have nothing to hide. I however don't post pics of him and I on there because that's rubbing salt in a very deep wound. On another thread you said that you DO have pics of both you & MM and MM & your kid... so I'm confused. You do or you don't? As to the thread--- xOW in my case wouldn't post on his FB wall but did like statuses/photos. So nothing really overt. Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted September 5, 2013 Share Posted September 5, 2013 You should ask a divorce attorney his opinion on this...Its become one of the number one causes of affairs, infidelity and divorce... TFY Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted September 5, 2013 Share Posted September 5, 2013 He didn't have FB at the time, I think he had a Myspace but I never used that much so we weren't friends on it. In the swing of the A Twitter wasn't around. So no we weren't friends on social media...which was good, as it made NC easier, as there was nothing to cyber stalk, unlike with other exes where I'd be in NC but still check up on their social media activity. Link to post Share on other sites
fanine Posted September 5, 2013 Share Posted September 5, 2013 We were friends on facebook but I found out later that he had blocked me from seeing virtually all his updates and photos etc...it's quite easy to do. Link to post Share on other sites
Author bentleychic Posted September 5, 2013 Author Share Posted September 5, 2013 You should ask a divorce attorney his opinion on this...Its become one of the number one causes of affairs, infidelity and divorce... TFY FB is definitely not the or even a contributing factor in our A. As I said, we originally met elsewhere. Link to post Share on other sites
canuckprincess Posted September 5, 2013 Share Posted September 5, 2013 Hmm, this was the conversation we had the other night. She said she has pics from two years ago because she has "nothing to hide". She also explained that she is using the forums as her way to out the affair to her MM's wife, who apparently stalks her here and on another forum. She basically said this is her way of telling Wifey the truth. When I asked her if she wants to tell the truth so bad (and especially because she has nothing to hide, as she often proclaims) than why not post a picture of her and her MM on FB since Wifey stalks her there, too? This was the response: Canuck has nothing to hide, but she doesn't post pics of her MM on FB. She wants Wifey to know, but won't post recent pics of her and MM on FB because it is distasteful... even though she has pics of her with her MM from 2 years ago. Clear as mud, right? I will explain, yes there are pics of myself and mm on my FB however they were taken before dday. As for my comment about nothing to hide, I simply mean my friends and family are well aware of the fact that my bf is married. I was asked not to post any new pics and I have honoured someone's wishes so no new pics have been posted. Now is it clear? Link to post Share on other sites
randomwoman Posted September 8, 2013 Share Posted September 8, 2013 Yes we are. I'm also friends with his wife and many other mutual people. We follow each other on a few sites, even not so popular ones. We mostly try to comment privately through text about a post instead of through likes and comments on social media. A few times we have liked and commented on social media. The issue I've had with social media is that it is more difficult to be immersed in the fantasy aspect of a EA when the person starts posting things for their mother/wife/real friends to see. That is their main audience. They may not tell you certain things/you may not want to be made aware of certain things(ie. those family vacation photos & We're Expecting!! announcements) and Facebook and other sites leave you no choice than to become aware. The sites also leave risk there for a public meltdown or outing and it's best that those opportunities aren't even available. Certain people are also very observant of your every like and comment and will see fishy things going on a lot quicker than if you just didn't connect on social media. Link to post Share on other sites
wrinkledforhead Posted September 8, 2013 Share Posted September 8, 2013 Yes. He follows me on one platform on which I express my feelings through my writing, through poetry. He has two FB accounts. One has just me on it, and is under a fake name. Mine is also under a fake name and is a small account which only has family on it. I've seen his other FB and looked through it (he willingly has shown it to me, let me see his family. His is also small and only for family). His BS is not text savvy, rarely texts, and does not have any social media accounts. Link to post Share on other sites
goldengirl11 Posted September 8, 2013 Share Posted September 8, 2013 Yes, I am mainly in touch with my MM via FB, which he asks to do. So, on his terms really. Link to post Share on other sites
Goodbye Posted September 9, 2013 Share Posted September 9, 2013 I am not at all current with social media. I have a very criptic FB and don't use it much. I never was friends on there with exMM. I will admit that I did start looking at his page, as well as his wife's. Mostly I wanted to know what was going on. Neither of their pages was very elaborate or informative, but when we went NC he totally made his FB page private. Link to post Share on other sites
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