ShelleyOh9 Posted September 5, 2013 Share Posted September 5, 2013 I don't care because for what I'm seeing on my surroundings and stories online about love deception, too many women getting string along once they move in with their bfs, commitment phobics.... it got to the point I don't care about it. I never lived with a bf because I don't like the idea of becoming attached to him later on and have to waste time when I can spend that on something else. I don't even last too long in a relationship. I just get bored and at times, I seek for a casual relationship (not too serious). In addition, I don't like having someone in my house for more than 2 days or vice-versa. I also never had the urge nor desires for kids either. Link to post Share on other sites
Malakas Posted September 5, 2013 Share Posted September 5, 2013 It is completely and absolutely normal. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Balzac Posted September 5, 2013 Share Posted September 5, 2013 It's normal for you. That's the only normal that matters. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ShelleyOh9 Posted September 5, 2013 Author Share Posted September 5, 2013 (edited) It is completely and absolutely normal. Thank you and the funny part is I had two guys asking me ''Why do you want marriage and kids, this is what most women want''? When I told them I just wasn't interested, both had a surprised look on their face and that was pretty much the end of the date. LOL I really don't get it. They want a woman that isn't going to bring marriage and kids on the table so when they have it, suddenly it becomes a turn-off?? It makes me think some people just don't even know what they want. Edited September 5, 2013 by ShelleyOh9 Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted September 5, 2013 Share Posted September 5, 2013 You're not weird. Well, if you are so am I I'm 30 and I don't care one way or the other about marriage, really. I used to. Right now though, the thought of it.....well I don't feel ready! I love my bf like crazy and moved across the country with him but I'm happy with the status quo, not looking at changing it at all right now. Maybe in a few years, maybe not ever, I don't know! Link to post Share on other sites
CherryT Posted September 5, 2013 Share Posted September 5, 2013 I think it's completely normal and I'm someone who wants marriage and kids. I would be more concerned if you felt that you needed to convince yourself to have those things because you thought it wasn't normal. If marriage and kids aren't in the books for you, there are men out there who just want companionship as well. Just because most women want that, doesn't mean it's something you should want too. I know someone who's mother never wanted kids or marriage. She felt that it was the thing to do (back then it was). She was a decent mother, but not overly motherly like some moms are. It wasn't until her kids were adults until they found out that she never really wanted kids. I don't believe she ever regretted having them, as her kids are amazing. But I know that they understand some of the coldness or distance that she had given them growing up. There is still love, but it's still been difficult for her children. Link to post Share on other sites
thatone Posted September 19, 2013 Share Posted September 19, 2013 Thank you and the funny part is I had two guys asking me ''Why do you want marriage and kids, this is what most women want''? When I told them I just wasn't interested, both had a surprised look on their face and that was pretty much the end of the date. LOL I really don't get it. They want a woman that isn't going to bring marriage and kids on the table so when they have it, suddenly it becomes a turn-off?? It makes me think some people just don't even know what they want. Actually there are a lot of guys who want kids as much as most women do. My brother was one, he always loved kids. Now that he has one he's as happy as he can be. Link to post Share on other sites
Nyla Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 Not everyone wants to settle down at the same time, so your feelings are completely normal, especially with what you have seen women go through. I never wanted to get married until I met my husband at age 25. He doesn't treat me the way I was afraid of when I was younger. Nobody can say that beliefs about relationships are "normal" or "abnormal". We all chose what is normal for each of us. Link to post Share on other sites
SuperGeek Posted September 21, 2013 Share Posted September 21, 2013 I'm 33 year old man and have no plans to get married currently. I tend to have casual relationships myself and just keep things simple. With that said, if I met a great woman I wouldn't rule out marriage or kids. Link to post Share on other sites
Vogeltron Posted October 7, 2013 Share Posted October 7, 2013 (edited) It is less common for women to feel this way. But from what I have experienced/seen. The longer someone goes with a super intimate relationship. Living with someone, spending crazy amounts of time together etc. The less you feel you need to get married etc. I guess it is all perspective. I am a 26 year old male. Similar situation never lived with a girlfriend. For the most part really never been a super serious relationship. As you get closer to 30 as I have seen more and more friends etc, getting married, having kids and what not. You ask yourself more what do you want in life. From some of the women I have gone out on dates with, and it has been quite a few. The ones that are dead set on starting a family etc or more set on marriage and finding "that person" sooner than later. While some of the other women I have met that either haven't decided or don't want a family are much less anxious to go down that route. This is just my experience. I will disclose my personal Opinion. Part of me would like to be a father one day. And hopefully have a solid relationship like I do with my parents. But another part of me has seen several couples married for like 30 years without any kids and they are probably in the most happy relationships I have seen. Just my perspective that and $2 will get me a cup of coffee at Starbucks. I will say for someone who doesn't care. I think you are and seem like your response more interesting in finding the right person for you. Rather than trying to fit into some societal mold. I need to be married at this age.. have kids by this age... Some people don't actually find their true love until they are 40-50-60 even later. You never know. Divorce rate is crazy high in this country. For me I just want to be happy. If that is alone so be it. If I am with someone I click with even better. Whatever it is, personally I would rather be happy single than be miserable locked into a relationship with someone else because I felt somehow I needed to be in one. Edited October 7, 2013 by Vogeltron Link to post Share on other sites
Criticality Posted October 11, 2013 Share Posted October 11, 2013 Yeah, it's normal. My wife never had much interest in getting married. Neither did I. So we didn't. And have been together for 13 years and have two kids. I call her my wife (esp. in public, like when we are staying in hotels, for example) cause its practical and cause you really can't get any more married than having two kids together. But it never bothered me that much. Then again, we live in a place that legally recognizes common law marriage. (Cohabiting together). That way I don't lose any rights, compared to a legal, legit husband. Whatever works. Link to post Share on other sites
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