theapprentice Posted November 16, 2004 Share Posted November 16, 2004 Do you guys think that it's true that girls generally give you one chance and if you don't take them up on it, it its over forever? Because once you blow it they start getting their ego up and take it as a rejection . If so how do you get over the ego issues and get them to get over their egos? How do you girls feel about this? Link to post Share on other sites
Pocky Posted November 16, 2004 Share Posted November 16, 2004 I never considered rejection as an ego boost. Link to post Share on other sites
Author theapprentice Posted November 16, 2004 Author Share Posted November 16, 2004 I don't mean as an ego boost. I mean they start to rationalise and say to themselves "since he rejected me I am going to reject him to get even". In essence, their ego works to protect themselves from getting hurt and they start taking psychological revenge on the person they perceive as having rejected them. They start saying things like "I'm too good for him" or "it's his loss". I've seen this happen to other guys too. If guys are initially not interested in a girl who is interested in them and they don't make a move within a certain time frame, the girl will eventually write them off and reject all advances from him. Link to post Share on other sites
Weird Posted November 16, 2004 Share Posted November 16, 2004 yeah, seems pretty common to me. Link to post Share on other sites
daphne Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 apprentice, yeah. I'm that way. I don't necessarily agree with the initial part of your rational but if a guy doesn't step up to bat he's showing me he's not all that interested and since I really dig guys that are crazy about me it's clearly not what I'm looking for. Is there a specific situation you want to share? Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 If a woman (not a girl) really really digs a man she will give him many opportunities for anything. This is a fact of life. They will chase th e man to every corner of the earth. Now, if a woman is indifferent about a man, then he won't get the time of day, not even once. Link to post Share on other sites
confusedleila Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 I don't think you can generalize. I, for one, dumped a guy because he didn't love me and I loved him. BUT years later I regreted that decision and chased him down. I think I was right the first time but I would give anything to be back with him again. If I felt that he still wasn't interested I think I would dump him again and that 's it. No more chances. It would be another chance for me anyway not for him, right? SO why kid myself? If I'll ever find a guy who loves me as much as I love him, I'd probably stick with him no matter what. But then if two people truly love each other there are no reasons to having to give another chance, correct? SO where does you question lead? If a girl/woman needs to give another chance, there's something wrong there. DOn't you think? Confusedleila Link to post Share on other sites
Author theapprentice Posted November 17, 2004 Author Share Posted November 17, 2004 Thanks for your replies. I'm not even talking about the relationship stage, I'm talking about the initial attraction. Sometimes guys are not ready to get involved and may not take up the opportunity offered to them and women are often quick to make a judgement call and take it as a rejection. In the process the female's ego gets bruised although it was not the guy's intention and subsequently they dismiss any attempts by the guy to rectify the matter. They start to dismiss any advances after the event, in effect ruling out any possibility of a relationship they might have had which I think is a little harsh. Link to post Share on other sites
daphne Posted November 18, 2004 Share Posted November 18, 2004 ah, yes I've done that two. twice in the past 6 months. One guy was crazy about me for about a year and a half but could never go past the heavy flirting stage. Had to take a walk on that one even if I thought he had major potential. guy #2 was a potential set up before my last ex. A mutual friend told him about me and he came out to watch me at a sporting event. Unfortunately I was involved with the ex who was closer to my age anyway. Later when I broke up with the ex and asked about the guy, I was told some vague stories and wrote it off. I saw him again after the breakup and he couldn't stop trying to get my attention but I was done. I ignored him and he got a little miffed but that's life. Just learn from this that life's too short and you have to carpe diem. Girls don't like marinating any better than guys do. Link to post Share on other sites
LadyLuck Posted November 18, 2004 Share Posted November 18, 2004 Originally posted by alphamale If a woman (not a girl) really really digs a man she will give him many opportunities for anything. This is a fact of life. They will chase th e man to every corner of the earth. Now, if a woman is indifferent about a man, then he won't get the time of day, not even once. Spot on Alphamale and from a 'womans' point of view. Link to post Share on other sites
lorenita1984 Posted November 18, 2004 Share Posted November 18, 2004 how do i make a thread???? Link to post Share on other sites
zara Posted November 18, 2004 Share Posted November 18, 2004 top right of the message board you view is a button that says "new post". Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted November 18, 2004 Share Posted November 18, 2004 I always felt that a woman who has good solid self-esteem would be less likely to give second chances. If they aren't what you are initially they can't magically change into what you want them to be. Being that i have low self-esteem I have given so many guys second chances - not because I was crazy about them, because I don't like being alone. Link to post Share on other sites
LadyLuck Posted November 18, 2004 Share Posted November 18, 2004 I have high self esteem and my ego certainly doesn't need any boost, yet I'm about to take yet another chance on and give another chance to a guy I love and who I first had a long relationship with 15 years ago. Why? Because I love him deeply and have always loved him. I'd have followed this guy to the ends of the earth back then and I'd follow him to the ends of the earth now. He means the world to me and always has. I certainly WOULD NOT give any second chance to anyone and anybody and simply because I was bored and alone.........lol Nor would a guy get a second chance, if I wasn't all that interested to start with/or indifferent too. Link to post Share on other sites
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