trying to make this work

[introspective]

Hello, this is my first thread post here. I am currentlly in a LDR with my girlfriend. Its a bit complicated, but heres how it goes. We met last summer, and were instantly attracted to each other. We got together, and things were great until she left for college. We didnt talk much about things, and it ended pretty abrubtly. We remained friends however, and as the rest of the year went on got to know each other alot better and became much closer. Well, this past summer we were hanging out one day and those same feelings we both felt came rushing back. We talked long about it and decided to try again. Once again things went smoothly durring the summer but now she is back at college again and i feel like it may happen again. First off, she is a very independent woman.. and i have learned to understand and respect that. Ive always been the kind of guy who wants to be there for his woman and do anything i could, but with her that is difficult at times, so ive learned when it is needed and when it is too much. My main concern at this point is our, or better yet, my lack of communication skills. I have no trouble when it comes to face to face communication or even text messaging, but over the phone, i go dead. I cant think, i cant seem to come up with topics, and i will just begin to ask question after question. We dont get to talk over the phone too often, so when we do it should be special and not just a lack of words to say. Our last conversation she told me she feels as though we dont talk much, and because of our busy schedules this is very true. But it doesnt help at all when we do talk and i cant even speak. If anyone has any advice it would be much appreciated.

[ThisGal]

lol I have the opposite problem, we both can't seem to stop talking; there is always something to say.

 

Talk about your day, her day, try to listen - shows that you care and paying attention, talk about anything really... short-term and long-term goals, expectations, the past, what the future holds for you two, feelings, should know each other's favorite color, hobbies, deep conversations, divulge and share personal stuff/secrets, desires, dreams and aspirations, really indulge in one another. We just yap, yap, yap and somehow neither of us get bored. Of course there will be times you won't want to talk and it'll end briefly, I've had these days. But talking a little is better than nothing and as you've mentioned, texting is fine so long as you two get to hear each other's voice sometimes. But just be yourself and try not to focus on what to say next, be relaxed/comfortable just as you are in person.

Edited September 7, 2013 by ThisGal