tiki Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 Porn this, porn that....It kills me to see the amount of people who are bogged down with porn issues in a relationship. It's sad. Please do yourself a favor and make sure that you are porn compatible for your mate before you commit to them. This is a serious issue that cannot afford to be overlooked. You need to be on the same page in regards to porn, to make this relationship work to it's fullest. Hi, I'm tiki. I hate porn and will not put up with it in a relationship. If you can hang, great. If not, NEXT. Link to post Share on other sites
The_Analyzer Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 Great post tiki! I would have to say that yes me and Mrs. A are porn compatible. However, we have our limits. We view it together from time to time. Out of respect for one another though, we do not hide it, look at it behind the others back etc. Its a together thing for us. ______________________________ "Don't argue with me, you wont win." Link to post Share on other sites
butterflygrl Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 hey tiki i totally agree with you .. if you love your SO you wouldn't continue to look at it when you know they don't like it.... i don't like porn either ..it ruins lives everyday!! it is no use when you already have someone make the most with what you have .. or if no move on just like tiki said Link to post Share on other sites
savethedrama4allama Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 Yep we're compatible. Wouldn't want it any other way. Life is too short to spend feeling guilty, repressed (when you want to view pornography but your mate disagrees) or disrespected or ignored (when you don't want to view pornography but your mate does). Link to post Share on other sites
Pocky Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 Eh..not really compatible but we compromise (Porn doesn't really excite me). As long as I'm getting laid he can look at all the porn he wants. Link to post Share on other sites
EC Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 Well you know I am a freak in discreet, and so is he so we watch it together and while we are away from each other it's all we have.... Like Pocky said as long as I am getting laid, and getting laid right I see no problem... Hi my name is EC and I bet my collection is better than yours. Link to post Share on other sites
Pocky Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 Hi my name is EC and I bet my collection is better than yours. Link to post Share on other sites
Stone Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 Me and my b/f are porn compatible, I even buy it for him for christmas I love it so does he works out pretty well for me Link to post Share on other sites
Naive Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 Hi all, my name is naive and porn is ok in my book. If you like to watch it cool, if not, cool. If you like to learn tips from it great!!!! If you like to use those tips in real life even better!!!!!!!!!! Porn is ok as a hobby not an addiction . I don't mind watching it with my partner and acting out what's going on in the porn, it's cool. I can't say that I get turned on by it but if it makes my partner a better lover or it entertains him then what the hey watch it we will !!! Link to post Share on other sites
Selena05 Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 Nope we are not compatible on that subject. I don't care for it and he does. He does it no matter how I feel. Been to counseling and everything. Last time we had a discussion about it I told him he could have his porn, hes gonna do it anyway. However, I also told him since you're going to do it anyway, don't ask me a damn thing when I'm out here doing mine. That was a kodak moment. Link to post Share on other sites
HarisHussain Posted November 18, 2004 Share Posted November 18, 2004 Pornography and the Islamic Solution The Prophet said, "A woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be a loser." In Islam, as can be seen from this saying of the Prophet, emphasis is not put on a person’s external appearance but on a person’s internal state. The Prophet explains in another saying that the person who marries a woman for other than her religion is in loss because of the fact that her wealth, family status, and beauty are all this-worldly things which by default must come to an end but her religion is something which will always remain. Imagine a world where your wife’s beauty was reserved for your eyes only and no one else would be able to take a glance at her. Imagine a world where the only woman you saw (other than your mother and sisters) was your wife. The only beauty you’ve experienced is that of your wife’s and how this would allow all of your sexual energy to focus on your wife exclusively. Your wife wouldn’t have to meet your unachievable goals of looking like a porn star or a supermodel and wouldn’t have to worry about your eyes feasting on young attractive women at work. Imagine a world where women weren’t exploited by big corporations so they could sell more of their products. These are not dreams, but in actuality these are things which are achievable. Islam has a solution to this problem which no under way of life can offer. Islam offers women a dress code which allows her beauty to be specifically reserved for her husband. Here’s a image of am Muslims woman: http://www.shukr.co.uk/Merchant2/merchant.mvc?Screen=CTGY&Store_Code=uk&Category_Code=women This is not to say, men do not have a dress code as they do. Men must cover from their awrah. What is the awrah? The `awrah (private parts to be necessarily covered) for men includes what is between the navel and the knees as stated by the Prophet (sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam), so covering it is obligatory according to Islamic law. Wearing shorts that disclose the thighs or show the shape of the buttocks, does not cover the `awrah. Neither does a dress that is transparent and displays skin complexion, nor a tight dress that shows the size, shape or bends of the `awrah. All of this is prohibited (haraam) in front of people whether the women are ashamed of looking at it or not. If the trousers (or pants) are wide enough and not tight, then one may tuck his shirt in it as long as it does not display his `awrah. Covering the `awrah is obligatory during the prayer and outside it. What many people do is cover their `awrah while going to prayer but are negligent of it outside the prayer. This is a clear mistake and a wrong act which happens due to lack of understanding or as a result of a misunderstanding of the matter. So as can be seen men must also dress appropriately but restrictions are not as strict as they are for women due to the simple reason that a woman’s attraction toward a man cannot result in rape while a man’s attraction toward a woman can as men are physically more capable than women. I’ll post more on this subject later, tell me what you guys think so far but before I end some verses from the Qur’an. He that desires the transitory things of this life, We readily grant him such things as We please to whomsoever We want, then We condemn him to hell, where he will burn, disgraced and rejected. He that desires the life of the hereafter and strives for it as best as he can provided he is a Believer, the endeavor of every such person will be accepted. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tiki Posted November 19, 2004 Author Share Posted November 19, 2004 Thanks to each and every one of you for posting. As you see, we get all ends of the spectrum. I think the most important things (in my opinion) to consider are being on the same wavelength as your mate and moderation. Link to post Share on other sites
Pocky Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 I’ll post more on this subject later, tell me what you guys think so far but before I end some verses from the Qur’an. I have heard many times that the attire required to be worn by Muslim women is an attempt to protect the women from men and not as an attempt to control or govern women. My response to that is, it is time that men took responsibility for their actions and changed how they perceive women. It is time that men mature and cultivate the type of respect that women deserve in society. And it's time we stop trying to hide the problem rather than deal with it. At some point, society needs to take responsibility for how it has allowed the role and image of women to evolve. Within a religious context, I understand that one needs to follow the laws that have been outlined. While this behavior is acceptable and understandable within certain religions, it should stay within those religions. I'm not Muslim and I disagree that is my responsibility to go to such an extreme in order to control the thoughts of a man. Link to post Share on other sites
einahpets Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 hi, my name is einahpets and i bet i could give EC's collection a run for the money. i have bought all the porn we own . unfortunatly my bf likes internet porn. i have no probs with porn as long as it is open and honest. NO LYING. that is where we ran into trouble. he was lying and erasing the history on the computer. if you are not doing anything wrong then you shouldn't have to lie. that is how i found this site, i was looking for answers. we actually went w/o sex for 8mos because of it. but he has not lied about it for a long time and we are finally having sex again. it is hard to get the trust back. we almost broke up because of it. but it certainly says something that we have only been together for a little more than two years (and for 8 of those months we weren't having sex) and we were able to get through this. Link to post Share on other sites
HarisHussain Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 I agree a hundred percent with you that men have to be responsible for their actions and thoughts but there are 2 extreames here again. One extreame is what you just mentioned which is women should be able to do what ever they want and they should not be blamed for what men do or think concerning them. Men should control themselves and their thoughts. The other extreame is women should be blamed for what men do to them even if this means rape because according to these extreamists "she was asking for it." Both extreames are incorrect and once again Islam presents a balance in this issue. This can be demonstrated in these verses of the Quran: 30 Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and be modest. That is purer for them. Lo! Allah is Aware of what they do. 31 And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and be modest, and to display of their adornment only that which is apparent, and to draw their veils over their bosoms, and not to reveal their adornment save to their own husbands or fathers or husbands' fathers, or their sons or their husbands' sons, or their brothers or their brothers' sons or sisters' sons, or their women, or their slaves, or male attendants who lack vigor, or children who know naught of women's nakedness. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And turn unto Allah together, O believers, in order that ye may succeed. The Qur'an first tells the men to lower their gaze and be modest and THEN it commands the women to lower their gaze and modest so I believe there is a balance. Link to post Share on other sites
bluechocolate Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 General Relationship Discussion > Are you and your mate porn compatible? So I take it that you & your partner are porn compatible? There is a section here for Spirituality & Religious beliefs, perhaps you should post there? Link to post Share on other sites
Author tiki Posted November 19, 2004 Author Share Posted November 19, 2004 So do your men dress this way too? Because women too, can fall to temptation. Link to post Share on other sites
savethedrama4allama Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 Originally posted by bluechocolate General Relationship Discussion > Are you and your mate porn compatible? So I take it that you & your partner are porn compatible? There is a section here for Spirituality & Religious beliefs, perhaps you should post there? HERE HERE Link to post Share on other sites
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