So for those w/ phone contact, what are YOU in his/her phone as?

[Lillyfree]

i was under a restaurant name. wasn't even a person...

 

yet another poisonous barb. ridiculous.

[Got it]

Seems most MM put their OW in their phone contact as a guy from work. I know mine does.

 

I always told him if she ever reads his texts to and from me, she's going to think he's totally in to guys.

 

It varied. My name for him, still the same in my phone, is my nickname for him.

 

My name is now my name but prior it was Lindsey Johansson.

[canuckprincess]

Seems most MM put their OW in their phone contact as a guy from work. I know mine does.

 

I always told him if she ever reads his texts to and from me, she's going to think he's totally in to guys.

 

 

thanks I needed that, you made me laugh

[canuckprincess]

How do you feel about this? Does it bother you that even your name is kept hidden and secret?

 

 

I'm well aware of the fact that i'm his dirty little secret. Although his wife knows all about me and has for 22 months.

[canuckprincess]

Well, despite the secrecy, I feel the need to point out that many people input random names, nicknames, and initials for other phone contacts as well. I know I have pet names for many of my contacts. But yes. I can imagine that for many the secrecy component would suck. I feel my personal A has quite a bit of a different dynamic than most on here.

 

How was is different? I know a lot are different, some are just sex and some are full blown relationships.

[WrinkledForehead]

I used to believe mine was different, too. In many ways it was but when push comes to shove, they all end the same.... Badly.

 

Yours resonates with me the most. Smooth sailing until the bitter end.

 

Smooth sailing until the bitter end. That resonates with me right now. Giant sighs and big hugs. I've been reading your posts, gaining insight into various situations.

[WrinkledForehead]

How was is different? I know a lot are different, some are just sex and some are full blown relationships.

 

Ours is a full blown R.

 

But "different dynamic" relates to this thread in the sense that since he doesn't live with her, it seems the red level of secrecy just isn't there. I can pretty much call or text whenever I'd like. Even having my real name in his phone likely wouldn't be a big deal, since she's not around him so much that it would matter, nor does she have at-will access to his phone.

 

Also different in that I've slept over and spent many, many hours and even days at his house when our schedules were compatible for it.

[C00kie]

He has my real name on his cellphone, because we are (very) distant family (cousins), so that seems to work as a huge alibi. There's no way she would suspect anything just by seeing my name.

 

Anyway, I still haven't read previous answers, so I don't know if anyone mentioned it, but another interesting question is what IS his wife in his phone number? Real name? Or something all lovey dovey?

 

When I met him, she was under the name "Queen" on his cell. Then his cellphone was stolen and when I checked again, she was under "Beautiful Wife". I comfronted him - "is this "beautiful wife" the one you're betraying and planning on leaving, according what you say?" He said she wrote that name, not him. Doesn't really matter who did though.

 

Argh.

[cocorico]

Seems most MM put their OW in their phone contact as a guy from work. I know mine does.

 

I always told him if she ever reads his texts to and from me, she's going to think he's totally in to guys.

 

I have several numbers, so I'd have appeared multiple times, against different country and area codes. I have no idea how I was listed, presumably variations of my name, as I am now. She did not have access to his phone, so it would have made no difference.

[cocorico]

Anyway, I still haven't read previous answers, so I don't know if anyone mentioned it, but another interesting question is what IS his wife in his phone number? Real name? Or something all lovey dovey?

 

When I met him, she was under the name "Queen" on his cell. Then his cellphone was stolen and when I checked again, she was under "Beautiful Wife". I comfronted him - "is this "beautiful wife" the one you're betraying and planning on leaving, according what you say?" He said she wrote that name, not him. Doesn't really matter who did though.

 

Argh.

 

She was down as "poison dwarf", which was what her father called her.

[bentleychic]

Anyway, I still haven't read previous answers, so I don't know if anyone mentioned it, but another interesting question is what IS his wife in his phone number? Real name? Or something all lovey dovey?

 

Her name, first and last.

[MissBee]

He has my real name on his cellphone, because we are (very) distant family (cousins), so that seems to work as a huge alibi. There's no way she would suspect anything just by seeing my name.

 

Anyway, I still haven't read previous answers, so I don't know if anyone mentioned it, but another interesting question is what IS his wife in his phone number? Real name? Or something all lovey dovey?

 

When I met him, she was under the name "Queen" on his cell. Then his cellphone was stolen and when I checked again, she was under "Beautiful Wife". I comfronted him - "is this "beautiful wife" the one you're betraying and planning on leaving, according what you say?" He said she wrote that name, not him. Doesn't really matter who did though.

 

Argh.

 

Hysterical :laugh:.

 

But question, did he volunteer to show you his phone or did you ask or what?

 

This also never came up. I never looked in his phone neither did he volunteer to show me her or anyone else's name in his phone.

[MissBee]

She was down as "poison dwarf", which was what her father called her.

 

LMAOOO....naturally

[C00kie]

Hysterical :laugh:.

 

But question, did he volunteer to show you his phone or did you ask or what?

 

This also never came up. I never looked in his phone neither did he volunteer to show me her or anyone else's name in his phone.

 

He did not volunteer. I grabbed it while he was sleeping and saw it.

I know, it's not a nice thing to do, it's disrespectful, doesn't show any trust, etc. Not making excuses, but I was anxious at this whole situation and I really wanted to know how things really were between them. He was sleeping. The phone was unlocked (oh, dumb men) by my side. So there.

[LilGirlandOW]

Last time I saw her name on his phone it was under her first name, that was almost a year ago...

[MissBee]

He did not volunteer. I grabbed it while he was sleeping and saw it.

I know, it's not a nice thing to do, it's disrespectful, doesn't show any trust, etc. Not making excuses, but I was anxious at this whole situation and I really wanted to know how things really were between them. He was sleeping. The phone was unlocked (oh, dumb men) by my side. So there.

 

Hmm.

 

I see...

[bentleychic]

MM always offers for me to see his phone. He'll be playing on it and I'll look away and he'll be like "You can look at it. I don't care. I have nothing to hide." He's been like that since day 1.

 

Now whether he deletes or locks stuff before he's with me b/c he knows that may happen, I don't know. LOL

[MissBee]

MM always offers for me to see his phone. He'll be playing on it and I'll look away and he'll be like "You can look at it. I don't care. I have nothing to hide." He's been like that since day 1.

 

Now whether he deletes or locks stuff before he's with me b/c he knows that may happen, I don't know. LOL

 

That's so weird lol

 

He probably does...as who says that?

[JamesM]

My first thought was....why doesn't he have a different phone? Why is your name even in his main phone?

 

It seems more logical to have an "affair phone" to keep the secret life more secret rather than demean the person by hiding her name in plain sight. I guess I don't know which is better.

[LilGirlandOW]

That's so weird lol

 

He probably does...as who says that?

 

Thats exactly what popped in my head first, he might just be a good trail sweeper?

 

This reminds me of "sweetiepies" "There is no OOW" thread.

[myname]

My number is under the name Peter, which isn't even close to my name, whatever, I hate it, my email is hidden under some stupid name too, basically it's all crap and I hate it. And sometimes I hate him for it too. And sometimes I hate me for being involved with it.

[brittanyanderson]

Just my actual first and last time.

 

But, that doesn't mean he doesn't religiously delete certain sensitive conversations we have over text

[bentleychic]

That's so weird lol

 

He probably does...as who says that?

LOL He is an odd one, but has done this since day 1. See, I have a thing where if someone pulls out their phone, I look away to give them privacy and I don't want them to think I'm being nosy. This is with ANYONE. Well, he pulls his phone out to send a text or look on fb, etc. and his phone is huge so if I don't look away, I can see everything. He always says I'm silly, I can see whatever and hands me the phone.

 

I'm the same way, though. He can look at my phone or fb if he wants to. I don't have anything to hide. (He's never taken me up on it, though.)

[MissBee]

LOL He is an odd one, but has done this since day 1. See, I have a thing where if someone pulls out their phone, I look away to give them privacy and I don't want them to think I'm being nosy. This is with ANYONE. Well, he pulls his phone out to send a text or look on fb, etc. and his phone is huge so if I don't look away, I can see everything. He always says I'm silly, I can see whatever and hands me the phone.

 

I'm the same way, though. He can look at my phone or fb if he wants to. I don't have anything to hide. (He's never taken me up on it, though.)

 

I get it...but I'm always leery of people who have to announce they have nothing to hide, when they aren't even being questioned...it just makes them seem guilty a priori. Just like those people who love to announce how "drama-free" they are when it really means they announced it without prompt because they are in fact the ones with THE MOST drama lol smh.

 

I have nothing to hide on my phone as well but I don't announce it to people lol..but in the case of someone cheating, maybe he feels like you already know he's a cheater, so will automatically distrust him, hence his own conscience makes him feel the need to announce his trustworthiness without being prompted.

[bentleychic]

but in the case of someone cheating, maybe he feels like you already know he's a cheater, so will automatically distrust him, hence his own conscience makes him feel the need to announce his trustworthiness without being prompted.

 

LOL I don't even know. Maybe so.