Why do men always come back?

[holly25]

Men don't always come back just to get laid. Men always reappear. I honestly believe it's because men are visual creatures, and cannot turn down a woman they are physically attracted to. I can't think of any other reason. What is the reason that men come back? It can't purely be based off of emotion...because emotions fade with time. It has to physical. Your thoughts?

[TigerCub]

Depends on what they come back to.

 

- If it's a relationship (dating) - they probably come back because of :

A. Emotions

B. The comfort of the familiar

 

- If they come back to a marriage, it could be

A. Emotions, love, shared history

B. The comfort of the familiar

C. Divorce is a bitch and they want to avoid the hassle.

 

I dunno...

My guesses. But I do think that most people return to a person or a situation because it is familiar and there are usually still feelings there.

 

So do you have lots of men coming back to you?

[holly25]

Every guy I've been with has come back, even if they dumped me. Like you said maybe its because they get comfortable with what's familiar to them? By the time some of them come back I don't want them anymore. The tears I've wasted over break ups...when they were just going to come back anyway. I know I'm not the only woman to go through this. Men always come back to us.

[emva07]

Don't know how much of a good thing they had till its gone.

 

Meanwhile for most of us all the crying that came with wondering why we weren't good enough, followed by the well screw him for not appreciating what I had to give and accepting it. Just to have then come back with the "remember how I thought you weren't good enough ? Well I haven't found Anything better " feelings is what makes us not want them back.

 

If

[Ninjainpajamas]

Mostly lack of options and the security blanket of something already established.

 

It's not entirely physical even though some men act reckless and just want to experience that spark again, It's not about YOU....it's just familiar, a fall back.

 

Your emotions and comfort give them the confidence or support when they are feeling blue or things aren't going their way, they're not going to come back to you if their lives are going great, they're making tons of money and women are falling all over them, even though they might keep the line open to you to keep them rooted.

 

I've talked to young women about this, I tell them to expect the guy to always come back because he can and will...especially after cheating or testing to see if the grass was greener...I tell them that's a test on them and he doesn't really respect you, but he'll say and do everything he can to get back under your good graces and trust again.

 

And sure enough...here they come.

 

"Baby I made a mistake, I can't live without youu!!! *muah muah muah*"

[holly25]

Don't know how much of a good thing they had till its gone.

 

Meanwhile for most of us all the crying that came with wondering why we weren't good enough, followed by the well screw him for not appreciating what I had to give and accepting it. Just to have then come back with the "remember how I thought you weren't good enough ? Well I haven't found Anything better " feelings is what makes us not want them back.

 

If

 

LOL that's exactly the process that we go through, then boom, he's back...but he's usually too late.

[thefooloftheyear]

Ive never came back-ever....Whats done is done...Ive experienced the exact opposite..Several of my exes have wanted back in....uh...nope.

 

 

TFY

[Dallers]

Not me. I just don't. Once you are gone, you are gone. Sometimes she comes back to me but I will never chase after something that left me or I didn't like. Pointless waist of brain power.

 

Certainly not physical either, if she was that good in bed I wouldn't have left her in the first place

[emva07]

It didn't even take my ex two weeks to be telling everyone "I will never ever find a woman half as good as emva07, she was the woman of my dreams" :lmao:

 

He's tried the texting me from someone else's phone since I blocked him.

 

I just gotta keep telling myself "love doesn't treat you like he treated you. He loves to be loved, but doesn't care to give it in return"

 

And that's what it is a lot of times, guys who are secure in OUR love for THEM that they think they can do whatever they want and we will sit there patiently waiting. They get carried away and forget that they are dispensable once we don't get the love and affection we need. Once we leave it's a wake up call, but I don't want to be the one he finally settles for because there was nothing better out there. I want my partner to be secure in his love for me just as much as I am in my love for him.

Edited September 10, 2013 by emva07

[holly25]

It didn't even take my ex two weeks to be telling everyone "I will never ever find a woman half as good as emva07, she was the woman of my dreams" :lmao:

 

He's tried the texting me from someone else's phone since I blocked him.

 

I just gotta keep telling myself "love doesn't treat you like he treated you. He loves to be loved, but doesn't care to give it in return"

 

And that's what it is a lot of times, guys who are secure in OUR love for THEM that they think they can do whatever they want and we will sit there patiently waiting. They get carried away and forget that they are dispensable once we don't get the love and affection we need. Once we leave it's a wake up call, but I don't want to be the one he finally settles for because there was nothing better out there. I want my partner to be secure in his love for me just as much as I am in my love for him.

 

Beautifully said.