Jilly10340 Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 I was sitting here in my office, bored, and I started thinking about sex before marriage. I myself am no virgin and not married, so it's a little late for me, but I know to some people waiting for the right person is important. Do you think that you should have sex with someone before you're married, just to make sure you "click" in the bedroom area? Link to post Share on other sites
Barby Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 I think it's wonderful if someone manages to wait until marriage to have sex...but honestly when you're in a hot and heavy relationship...first comes the kissing, it always progresses to making out, then nine times outta ten it ends up leading to sex. Unfortunately younger and younger kids are doing this and with people they just meet thinking this will ensure a relationship with that person but as everyone knows, that's not the case... When it's two consenting adults both in it for the same reasons...be it only for sex and both parties understanding that then I say "have at it" as long as they are responsible and mature about it. If entering in a relationship and it's planned to be exclusive and serious and both parties are comfortable with having sex then I also say "have at it" But it's unfortunate when both parties are consensual and think they both are in agreement that there will be a relationship, then sex occurs and the guys automatically thinks the girl is whore because she "gave it up" that's when I think there is a problem...it's better for both to be honest about what they're expecting that way it saves heartache and mis-understanding! Just my 2 cents! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jilly10340 Posted November 19, 2004 Author Share Posted November 19, 2004 I was engaged once to a guy, and we had sex before marriage and it was just awful. We never ended up getting married, but I was always thankful that I didn't wait for if we had gotten married and found out the sex just wasn't that good. What a let down that would have been! Oh, but I didn't break it off because the sex wasn't good, I was just too young to get married! Which brings up another question, would anyone dump someone else because they weren't good at having sex? Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 Originally posted by Jilly10340 Which brings up another question, would anyone dump someone else because they weren't good at having sex? Well...yeah. I make an effort, so should they. And if you can't stand being in bed with them, what is the point, really? Of course I am the poster child for reasons to not have sex before marriage. Link to post Share on other sites
Barby Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 Which brings up another question, would anyone dump someone else because they weren't good at having sex? I say if they weren't willing to work on it and weren't willing to compromise then I could see maybe parting ways...but a relationship should be based on communication, willingness to learn, grow and change (to an extent). If you're talking size...well that's something obviously that can't be changed but in my experience that's never been an issue.... So I guess my answer to this one would be No I wouldn't dump someone based on this unless they were stubborn, selfish, and un-willing to bend on anything (this would likely manifest itself in a lot of other areas of the relationship). Link to post Share on other sites
tattoomytoe Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 i useed to think i would wait till i was married to have sex, back when was like 13 or 14. and i think it did help me to wait unti l i was 19. it was a nice thought, but very impracticle for ME. Which is what i stress...For Me. i think sex is a huge part of a happy marriage, and if the person you commit to marry and you suck in bed together...i am not saying call off the marriage, but knowing it will be a point to work on will help in the future union. I am glad i did not wait. For one i am 25 and it would suck not having sex for this long! second, i am sooo much better now than i was at 19, in that i know my body better i am comfortable with how i act when i am having sex, and i know what i want. i am a lot more sexually liberal now too, which i think is qite hot! Link to post Share on other sites
imjustagirl Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 I agree w/ you tat....when I was 12...I knew I was sure I was going to wait till marriage because marriage could not be that far away...."I'll get married when I'm 19"...or so I thought. But, I was 12. I realized a couple years later, that well, there is no way in hell I was going to be ready to marry anyone at 19....and then it happened....it was oh so wrong, but oh so right at the same time. I realized that I was missing out on something spectacular...something special and I needed more, but knew I had to wait until I was older, at least in college...and I did...which is why I graduated high school in May and started college in August...and was getting a regular "lai" by September. But, I still remember till this day, as do my friends, as I was the first one of the group....telling them during lunch, "wait, it's not really that important at our age anyway, think of the things that could happen." They did wait...which their parents are amazed..but as soon as they did...knocked up! First time and they all 3 get knocked up...and they did wait till college...sadly to say, neither one of them finished. Thing is...they still blame me for hoarding all the sex Maybe I was, maybe I wasn't.....but I love it and NEED it...*sigh*...and here I am at work! Link to post Share on other sites
Naive Posted November 19, 2004 Share Posted November 19, 2004 It would have been great to wait until after I got married, but sex is too good to pass up when the right person is there, married or not!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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