OverThinker72 Posted September 13, 2013 Share Posted September 13, 2013 Nine weeks of No Contact out the window ffs. A couple of days ago I made a post where I expressed how I longed to hear his voice and how I missed him. Well well well...Guess who got in contact last night? Oh yeah..the ex I broke every rule I've stood by and preached to others...I'm a loser!!! He started off by sending me a text asking how I was. I asked who it was as I had deleted his number. Before it could even sink in he called but I didn't answer. Then another text saying he just wants to chat. Then another pleading. I asked him why. What did he want to talk about. He begged. He called a couple of more times and...here's where I messed up...I answered. Well it was a three hour conversation that ended in nothing but gave me answers I guess. What can I say? It was a conversation where he asked a lot of questions, and I remained casual and indifferent. Was this a put on? NO!!! I actually felt like it didn't matter anymore. He wanted to know how I remained so calm when he ended it...I replied a simple "Ok" to his break up text. He wanted to know if I was seeing anyone, if I was happy, did I know the Star Trek film came out on DVD and reminded me how he never let go of my hand throughout the duration of the film, talked about his son who still remembers all our outings together, he said I changed that I seem hard, strong even, told me I broke his heart when I ended it the first time, told me about his new relationship, called the man I'm dating a bad word, apologised for calling, asked me if I were to choose between him and the man I'm dating, who would I choose...etc etc etc.......He seems angry that I'm trying to move on lol. Well let me tell you, although I'm still hurt my reaction to his call surprised me but confirmed one thing...I don't want him back. Apparently he cried over us, he has bad days and is drinking. He's lost interest in his job and says he's gained weight. Do I feel sorry for him? No way!!! I'm thinking about myself. Unfortunately I don't think it's the last I've heard of him but going back to No Contact and have already sent off for a new sim..so new number. I'm angry at myself but I have strength and faith in myself. Some of you might think I was wrong in taking his call, but please don't shout at me lol. I'm dating a Scottish hunk now, very yummy Taking it very slow and he knows about everything that's gone on. I now focus on my children, myself, my new job and sharing smiles and laughter with my loved ones. I hated bloody Star Trek!!!! lol Hugs from London xx Link to post Share on other sites
Petunia20 Posted September 13, 2013 Share Posted September 13, 2013 I'm at 10 weeks of NC and I often wonder if he will call and what will he say. Different scenarios play in my head. Dont blame you for answering at all. We dont know what we will do until we are faced with that situation. Im curious tho...what did he want from you? Did he beg you back, did he express any type of regret or reconciliation? Link to post Share on other sites
Author OverThinker72 Posted September 13, 2013 Author Share Posted September 13, 2013 Hi Petunia I played many scenarios too but it was me telling him to go f**k himself lol, however faced with reality you react differently. Yes, he expressed anger and regret. He regrets that we didn't try harder, that something so amazing had to end and that we lost a beautiful future. Erm..he eventually ended it!!! No, neither of us want to try again, so him wanting me back is not on the cards. When we got together one thing I made very clear is that I never get back with an ex. I never have and never will, even if it kills me..So he knows not to even go there. I just think he was curious. He made so many sly remarks it was a bit pathetic really There was sadness in his voice I have to admit, but he is with someone else and I am now dating someone, which angers him very much. To be honest I am now regretting very much giving him my time. May I ask how your relationship ended and how you are doing? Hugs xx Link to post Share on other sites
emi Posted September 13, 2013 Share Posted September 13, 2013 The main point of Nc is to to prevent you expose yourself to the ex ( mentally abuse etc) If u doing fine, and got no hope get back together or you are devastated when u knnow he is with someone else then i think you doing fine no need shooting 1 Link to post Share on other sites
PR08 Posted September 13, 2013 Share Posted September 13, 2013 He started off by sending me a text asking how I was. He called a couple of more times and...here's where I messed up...I answered. Well it was a three hour conversation that ended in nothing but gave me answers I guess. What can I say? It was a conversation where he asked a lot of questions, and I remained casual and indifferent. Was this a put on? NO!!! I actually felt like it didn't matter anymore. He wanted to know how I remained so calm when he ended it...I replied a simple "Ok" to his break up text. He wanted to know if I was seeing anyone, if I was happy... He seems angry that I'm trying to move on lol. Well let me tell you, although I'm still hurt my reaction to his call surprised me but confirmed one thing...I don't want him back. Apparently he cried over us, he has bad days and is drinking. He's lost interest in his job and says he's gained weight. Do I feel sorry for him? No way!!! I'm thinking about myself. Unfortunately I don't think it's the last I've heard of him but going back to No Contact and have already sent off for a new sim..so new number. I'm honestly struggling to see what you did wrong, or what you have to be angry about? You handled it like a pro. They always snap and try to come back when they sense that you're moving on, and you won the battle! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Angry bird Posted September 13, 2013 Share Posted September 13, 2013 I think it makes it easier when they "break" and call you. You can walk away not feeling so discarded.Being broken up with does a number on yourself esteem. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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