Unwanted situation

[Pancake08]

Here i am again,

 

Me and my husband had been separted for 3 months now and we have 5 months old baby.

And lately my ex is telling me he cant see any future with me anymore and i really wanna get him back because i want to have a complete family and i want to give my son a normal life that he haven't been experience since he was born. Help me guys how can tell him to work with our marriage..and make him realize that his soon need him.

 

My son is suffering so much with the conflicts between us. Do you think i still have a chance to save my marriage even though my ex stop talking to me on the phone but we are talking when he is with my son.and if he alrey deleted everything that reminds of our beautiful journey on facebook??

[StrongLass]

I'm sorry to hear that, that's a heartbreaking situation especially when you can't help but think there should be no problems but somehow one person's giving up anyways.

 

And that's your dilemma. It takes two to make a marriage work & if he's deleting all your photos together & saying he's done then the only person who can change his mind is himself. Maybe he's immature, maybe there's someone else, maybe he realized this wasn't the life he wanted...ultimately the reason doesn't matter. Only the fact that he's done trying does.

 

What you need to be doing now is worrying about yourself & your son. A strong mother = a happy & healthy child in many situations now a days even if the father isn't around as often as would be best.

[Pancake08]

Thanks for the input.

Do you think i should give up the family that we built together..??

I think he is being immature and he is not ready to take his responsibility as a father and husbnd as well, what i shpuld do to make him regret by leaving us. And as a mother i feel pity for him i cant give a life he deserve and his father seem like he is just having fun while me and his son is having it hard..

 

Is there's anything that can change his mind and be a man, be a father. I could been easy for me to be a single mom if i am from here but i am only immigrant and not so good of speaking their languge and also doesnt hve job and now i am living for free to my friend together with my son..so generally we need him.

 

I gave up my life in US for him but not i am totaly broke with 5 months old son.

[Yasuandio]

He has abandoned you and your son. That may be a very good thing - I am sorry to say that to you. But if he is a bad husband, he is leaving you in an excellent position to get out of there with your child, which should be your number one priority, now thay you see what kind of man you have. Like you said, you have employment options in US, and can make it work.

 

Hopefully you were married in the US. If there is any way to get back to the US with your child to see an attorney you better do it. His Country probably is set up different from US. Without knowing the country you are in - I cannot speculate if you would be treated fairly there.

 

I did know a young US woman who went with her husband to India and lost her child for more than a year. She was devastated. I don't recall how she got the daughter back, perhaps child was US citizen. Be careful.

 

Do you have child's passport? I hope child was born in US and has US passport. Otherwise, you may need the father to assist in getting a passport. I don't know the procedure. But you better find out. Unless you want to be Court ordered to raise the child there by a Judge in that country (if child was born there). Depending on the country - I'm not sure if I'd trust an attorney. It all depends on the Country you find yourself in. That makes all the difference in the world. Yas

 

PS. Don't talk about this issue to any of the neighbors or even your best friend your intentions Maybe on an iPhone or Telephone Card to US friends of your's and your relatives ONLY. No Internet, nothing in writing. Or any of your intentions. Just say he took a job away for a few months on an oil rig or something.

Edited September 15, 2013 by Yasuandio

[Pancake08]

He has abandoned you and your son. That may be a very good thing - I am sorry to say that to you. But if he is a bad husband, he is leaving you in an excellent position to get out of there with your child, which should be your number one priority, now thay you see what kind of man you have. Like you said, you have employment options in US, and can make it work.

 

 

 

its hard to admit but absolutely he abandoned us because of his hobbies,family and friends..

Id been wanting just to go back to my home country but i cant because i am not allowed to take my son with me and beside my ex husband's father is hiding his norwegian passport, despite of my personal problem i've experienced racial discrimination here, people who suppose to help just left me hanging in the air..it's a lot of thing should i do but i am stuck in this place..

 

 

I got a free attorney in here but they are so prejudise that he said he can't help me to defend me in the court just in case there will be proceeding.. I don't know anymore the only way i see to make things better if my ex will comebck to us, and finally will move to other place and start a new life.. do you think guys its possible to change his mind...i'm really in dire jeopardy

[Yasuandio]

What is your home country?

 

Where are you now?

 

Is there an embassy for Norway to get replacement for son's passport? Did you have a copy? Do you have his birth certificate? Your own too?

 

If I were you, I'd go visit you embassy first, and I'm praying it's the US. If so, perhaps they could grant your son temporary citizenship while you apply, or at least just for travel.

 

I am just reaching for answers. Because you have to get out of a country that doesn't respect women. And now a solicitor knows about you.

 

I thought about a phony passport - but you can't do that now that someone knows about you, and you can be sure he has contacted other officials. I'm not trying to scare you, but that sounds like the kind of place you in.

 

Maybe hoping husband comes back is a good idea. The fact the passport is being held is interesting, isn't it. Read the 180's, and do not beg. Keep your dignity. Nice your way into a civil society, lie, say there is a home your family is giving you. Whatever. Then, get rid him, and have him arrested for holding you and your son hostage.

 

Keep evidence. I think he's going to come back. Play it cool - don't be too nice. Read the NC also. But the 180 is best for your situation. I think you need to be very careful about using the Internet also. I think you should stop -I am sure one day he will discover what you have written. Unless you r really smart with computers. Maybe an iPhone (on different account). Erase everything immediately. Trust noone. Only parents eldest brother, sister. That's all. Not even your best friend, maybe the best friend, but friends talk, that is the problem. Yas