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The Cheated is now the Cheater


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Since i was in 8th grade i fell in love with a boy i KNEW that was a cheater. In my mind i thought i would be able to change him. For 3 WHOLE years i have been constantly cheated on by the same guy. from seeing him kiss other girls in front of me to getting into face to face arguements about me harassing their relationship. i even gave him my virginity to him at school outside in the dugout! i have been bullied because i got caught doing this stupid thing. i was so in love that even tho he might have gotten another girl pregnant, i still took him back in open arms hoping he would change. finally i gave up and let him go and moved on. but in a pretty much bad way. a few months after me and our best friend started dating (in a way at first) to make my first love jealous but soon after i was focused on my new relationship with him. 8 months later i felt as if my boyfriend at the time was cheating on me. lately he was talking to this one girl hanging with her at lunch in the classroom alone ALL DAY! one day i went thru his phone and found out they had "sex" or from what she said at least. not even five days after us calling quits i found out i was pregnant. he didnt want to keep it i didnt either but i didnt believe in abortions or giving it up for adoption. and even if i did believe in abortions he skipped the states for the summer so when he FINALLY came back i was already four in a half months pregnant. a week after school started my and my babies father started back talking and hanging out. it was to the point where he was telling me his business about his 15 year old girlfriend who was still a virgin and that she fell in love with him. a few days later after school he told me that him and his girlfriend borke up. in the same month when school started i started back going over his house when his dad wasnt home. on that same day we started back having sex. as time went by we were sexually active and later on i found out he lied to me about him and his 15 year old girlfriend braking up. the situation was so serious to the point where i contracted a s.t.d from him becasue he was not only having sex with me but also the girl as well. i ended up cutting this dude out of my life only for a while. when i became nine months pregnant i meet my soulmate. i am his first love by the way. we have been dating for 21 months now and a few weeks ago i have been feeling unhappy so i reached out to a friend of mine who is also my ex. we never had sex while we were dating but lately while i was felling unhappy i would have sexual conversations with this boy to where you can say i was leading him on. but after all of that we havnt had any sexual contact. i recently got caught and he forgave me the same night. we are currently not together. i cant stand how hes able to forgive me so easily when i hurt him soo badly. i mean for me to experience both sides of the field it breaks me when i think about me hurting him. and hes still telling me he loves me and taking care of my child. how do i cope with my selfishness of being unhappy when all this man did was love me? he have a job to take care of me and my child that he calls his own on matter what the dna test says. hes been in her life since day one literally. him and his mother visited me after i had her. if he could have had it his way he would have been there to support me giving birth and signed the birth certificate and hes even ready to propose to me. how can i be so unhappy when hes doing things like this to and for me! i need advice on my life!

Edited by FindingMyOwn
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Sounds like you started up too young and it scarred you. You still do not seem emotionally ready for a real relationship, which is why your trust issues are everywhere. Which is why you've met someone so kind and forgiving and you can't respect him for that, you're too expectant of being treated poorly.

 

Right now I'd say focus on yourself and your child, and fix your current relationship before you really push away someone who cares about you.

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And people wonder what happened to the good ones. Why is it so difficult to just talk to your mate if you're unhappy?

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