Everytime I go for the girls i like...i fail

[terrysnake]

Hey guys its my first post here in search of advice or just plain pity at this point. Its seems every time I muster up the courage to ask a girl out, rejection finds its way to me. I haven't had a girlfriend since I was 13 and since then I have been rejected by 3 amazing girls I thought I had a genuine chance with. You guys are probably thinking , only 3!? Well yes I'm not really the type of guy who gets with any girl just to avoid being single and these girls really had me going going for them.

 

the first one was when i was 14, i know thats to young to call love but man was she a cool chick...so down to earth, very smart ,never really used makeup and was gorgeous for a girl our age at that time. I got to know her, hung out a couple times, we sought each other for help, but when I finally thought it was time to ask her out she plainly said no, moved away and i never saw her again. One year later i met the second girl whom i fell for because she was as cool, gorgeous and an awesome girl. She was in most my classes so we talked alot, hung out but thinking i had rushed things with the last girl i waited a while to ask her out. In fact too long to the point where someone else beat me to her( i know go ahead laugh). I never found out she had a bf until i asked her out got rejected.

 

After that i said **** it ill eventually find a girl who wants to be with me and well time flew. Four years later, after having some financial problems at home i sacrificed my ticket to college to help my pops with bills and mortgage and so i got a full time job. Once i stepped through through those doors i thought i saw the most beautiful red head,the aphrodite of my dreams(lol), I had seen in my life. Despite being rusty at talking to girls i put my chest out and talked to my new co worker (s*** i know its already a bad situation trying to date a coworker). time flew We talked, i got to know her (at least i thought) our eye contact was excellent, I thought I had a pretty good chance....until I found out she had a boyfriend.

 

Once again depressed I drifted away from her to avoid myself a huge heartache,BUT one day I found her crying in the hall wall and of course I approached her and learned that she had frequent fights with her bf and was unsure if she could take anymore. Jesus Christ I thought I was going to cry too of utmost happy ness so I comforted her for days sending her signs that I liked her and would treat her better than her bf. So thinking I had learned no to rush thing but not to wait too long I mustered up the courage to hold her hand look her straight into her eyes and asked to join me for some stress free fun at the arcade bar.

 

She said she didn't know if her bf would like that. Wtf? I thought you said that prick was an immature ******* who doesnt value the beauty of a girl he has. "Im sorry thats the way i am " wtf!? Anyways this happened yesterday and it ****ing killed me inside, never before have i been this deppressed. Maybe i m making it more to be than it is but when you think your in love you tend to think its the end of the world. I know I don't wear my heart on my sleeve because I have been asked out before and out of gratitude for their interest in me I would hang out with but never let it carry on to the point where I would hurt them.

 

Anyways I'm very sorry that this post this extremely stupid long but I guess I was just venting some of my emotions here, something I rarely do. I might have not expressed or explained my self like I would liked but I'm just not thinking rationally right now. Laugh , cry, or troll me it doesn't really matter anymore at this point. let m know what you think

Edited September 15, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
paragraphs, use them please

[Scales]

First of all the title is a little misleading. Every time is 3 times. 2 of those as I take it were in your teen years which you might as well throw into the experience pile. Not that they didn't hurt, its just teen dating isn't really considered in the same category as adult dating.

 

The thing with the redhead, she has a boyfriend. It happens a lot. If she likes you more then she will reveal herself to you at some point. Do not get sucked into to being her gay best friend who is there for emotional support. Yes her boyfriend is an abusive dick, but she is still attracted to him. He is just not nice. Don't attempt to be her emotional friend unless you just want to be friends. You are just filling in a hole that her boyfriend ignores and taking care of it for him. Also she rejected you, which is nice. A lot of girls would have taken you up on that offer to go to that arcade bar, take your money, peace out, and then still complain about their bf to you while at the same time continuing to use you without having any real interest in you.

 

The problem here is definitely the 3 girls. You shouldn't place so much interest in having a relationship, and start seeing who you are attracted to in general. You have to increase your numbers or you will have 0 to possibly 1 relationship over the course of 10 years. Identify what you find attractive and start going to events looking for those girls. If there aren't any, you either lower your standards or move.

[terrysnake]

First of all the title is a little misleading. Every time is 3 times. 2 of those as I take it were in your teen years which you might as well throw into the experience pile. Not that they didn't hurt, its just teen dating isn't really considered in the same category as adult dating.

 

The thing with the redhead, she has a boyfriend. It happens a lot. If she likes you more then she will reveal herself to you at some point. Do not get sucked into to being her gay best friend who is there for emotional support. Yes her boyfriend is an abusive dick, but she is still attracted to him. He is just not nice. Don't attempt to be her emotional friend unless you just want to be friends. You are just filling in a hole that her boyfriend ignores and taking care of it for him. Also she rejected you, which is nice. A lot of girls would have taken you up on that offer to go to that arcade bar, take your money, peace out, and then still complain about their bf to you while at the same time continuing to use you without having any real interest in you.

 

The problem here is definitely the 3 girls. You shouldn't place so much interest in having a relationship, and start seeing who you are attracted to in general. You have to increase your numbers or you will have 0 to possibly 1 relationship over the course of 10 years. Identify what you find attractive and start going to events looking for those girls. If there aren't any, you either lower your standards or move.

 

You are absolutely right, after a brief reflection and couple self slappings I managed to come back to my senses. I am aware that those 3 girls, two of those who dont really count as true romantic attractions, are not really such to take too into consideration. After what happened two days i just happened to look back on how each girl slipped away and overeacted. Im actually ashamed i posted this thread as i dont really seek help or comfort online as i dont really get emotional despite the long post. ill find a girl to play around with thanks for your reply.