Am I finished?

[sweetcherrycrush]

I am new to this site. Lately I have just been feeling lost. I'm trying to lose weight, have been successful so far but lately I just feel like I'm finished in life being happy. I'm 27 yrs old. Men have either have refused to date me because they want very young girls, or older men have only wanted to date me because I'm young enough. I feel dead inside. Why is everything about age? Why do I feel like I'm washed out and not good enough for anyone, since when did 27 become not good enough? I like to wear sparkly bright clothes, I am turning 30 in a few years and I feel like I have to change the entire way I dress because can I really get away with dressing the way I truly want to as I get older? Why isn't it this way for men? Everyone I know is married with babies and I don't even want that yet, I still want to have fun and go clubbing and things like that but I feel I'm too old for that too. Sometimes I feel like I'll still be ugly even if I lose weight because of the age factor and it just really hurts. I realize I could say oh well and not care what people think but I just feel like people are always talking about this and thats the way the world is and I flat out do not fit in this world. I also feel the clock is ticking and I have to hurry up and lose as much as I can by the time I'm 30 because the years of feeling pretty and beautiful will be gone. Whats the point of even being on this earth and feeling so done with and used up?

[FitChick]

Where do you live? That is certainly not true in big cities where people are more sophisticated. Even in media, the older woman is celebrated as being sexy and desirable by men of all ages, so that old stereotype is dead. The time has never been better for older women. And you are in your twenties, which is young.

 

It's not your age that is turning men off, it's the excess poundage and your embarrassment. Lose the weight and you will feel better about yourself and will be beating men off with a stick! Your world will suddenly look very different.

[Copelandsanity]

1) I'm sorry, but 27 is young. Even mid-30s, I wouldn't consider that old and "used up," although considerations would have to be made if one wants to have children. If you want to look pretty and beautiful for a long time, then work out with weights, be physically active as much as possible, eat a clean diet, use sunscreen and try out the anti-aging stuff like argan oil. You'll look young forever.

 

2) If everyone you know is married, then you have to go out and make new friends that like the things you do and are more on your wavelength. There are tons of people of all ages that are into all sorts of interests and hobbies. It's your job to put yourself out there and find them. I know a woman who is in her late 40s, whose heart is young and she goes out and has adventures all the time with friends of all ages.

 

3) How overweight are you? You said that you have to lose as much by the time you're 30. It shouldn't take years to get to a shape you're content with. Barring a medical condition, the biggest problem I see with people trying to lose weight is that they're not efficient in their execution or they lack discipline. I have the opposite issue - I'm skinny and have to gain weight - but I'm extremely meticulous with diet and working out and I only use methods that are guaranteed to work in the shortest amount of time.

[dashfinn]

Hi SCC,

 

I'm sorry that you're feeling this way. This might sound hard for you, but you really have to take responsibility of your feelings. You have to do some serious inner searching why are feeling this way. We often think that it is the outside world that makes us feel like feel - when in reality it is us who make ourselves feel like we feel. You have the full capacity to feel great about yourself. From my perspective, things are looking quite good for you.

 

About the age thing: you're not that old. You're 27: as a guy turned 31 your age would seem perfectly fine for me. There a lot of great guys near your age who are doing the same thing you are. Spend time with them and trust me, magic starts to happen.

 

You know, in this life, people try to tell you how should do things. Get this education, marry at this age, get these types of friends, do this as your job and so on. The bad news is that this is never going to stop. There are always people telling you what is the "right" way to do things, the "right" way to life your life. Now, the good news is that you can freely choose if you decide to listen to these people or not. You are just as talented, beautiful, capable and intelligent as they are. They are no special people. This notion allows you to do freely what you desire in life.

 

If you want to still go out, dress brightly and hit clubs - then what the hell - go for it. Some people might call you "too old" for it. Leave those opinions outside of your own.

 

Of course all this requires effort from you, daily. Just don't give up and you'll get there. Learn to live your life as you want to live it and then keep doing it. For the rest of your life.

 

I wish the best of luck to you!

[gaius]

Yeah, whenever I hear a woman complain about only being able to attract elderly men I just assume it's because she's heavy. Unless you're giving out ice cold vibes, guys your age will hit on you if you keep yourself in reasonable shape.