This will help you guys out!!!

[TylerZ]

OK guys...This may be some enlightment for you all that are hurt and feeling down. NO, this is not a "NO CONTACT WORKED FOR US!" And we got back together!!! It's a reality check, but has some great great rewards. Just think, I mean really really think, when you were with your ex you still looked at other people and said....hmm he/she is hot. Some of you would even flirt, some of you even thought about cheating. I know you are SO hurt now, that they are gone that you couldn't possibly think of dating other people. I felt the same way. I just broke up wiht my ex about....10 days ago. I did the begging and pleading, and crying, and feeling sorry for myself and hoped that we would get back together. You know....we loved each other a lot, and we might get back together, but we may not. I'm still hurt, and I still wonder about her dating other guys, that's because we were together so long, but I just had this wonderful realization....I"M SINGLE AGAIN! That's kick ass! I can go out to parties and get hammered and make out with some girl on the dance floor. I can go out to the bar and not have to come home, I don't have to answer to anyone, I don't have to do stuff I don't want, I can stay out all hours of the night and not be afraid to call because I'm going to be late. It's so liberating, I'm going to be able to meet new people, and hang out like on friends just doing nothing, go on trips...I'm gonna go to cancun with a group this spring!!! I NEVER would have been able to do that if I was with my ex. It's exciting! You should be excited too!!!

 

You know...some of you are really in love with your ex yet. But you have to think, they weren't worth your time. Things weren't perfect, but they didn't care enough to work on them. No matter how poorly you treated them...anyone one of you could have talked, to make changes...together. YOu could have gone to therapy and worked on things. But they just wanted to drop you...forget that!!!

 

Again, I'm excited to be single. It's going to do a lot of things, it's gonna let me be free. It's going to get my mind off my ex. It's going to let the NC time fly by. Before you know it, you will be single, happy, having fun, and then all of the sudden, BOOM. Your ex is goign to call you. And you're going to have to think....Do I really want her/him back now? I'm having a blast, or I met this new girl that's even better....do I wanna waste my time with him/her all over again? You're just gonna laugh and be happy. And so NO MORE!

[pancakepalace]

You know...some of you are really in love with your ex yet. But you have to think, they weren't worth your time. Things weren't perfect, but they didn't care enough to work on them. No matter how poorly you treated them...anyone one of you could have talked, to make changes...together. YOu could have gone to therapy and worked on things. But they just wanted to drop you...forget that!!!

 

This is so true.

 

Good post.

 

Thanks,

pel

[lost_in_chgo]

Sure it's true when you don't take into account any other factors.

 

What about traumatic or emotional events like the death of a parent or child, or a divorce.

These things, if they occur early in a relationship, can put a huge stress on a person and cause them to run away without any evil intent.

 

It isn't fair to expect offers of counseling or conversation to have much effect when the person is just completely overwhelmed. You can't expect them to place your needs higher than their own at a time like that.

 

And once done, it might not be possible to undo.

[blackendangel13]

I love this post! I couldnt be happier that my ex is gone. In the begginning I was a huge mess. I tried everything to get him to come back when it really wasn't my fault he was gone. I went through that death in the family and you know where my man was... at the bar. Who the hell needs someone like that. I had a health scare, where was he... at the bar. I totally agree. If you love someone you fight for them, and I fought tooth and nail. You fight to fix things, but sometimes they just don't love you enough back. In those cases you are so much better off. I am seeing someone new who treats me like a freaking queen. None of you deserve to be treated any less, and its obvious that you are not being treated that way. Enjoy being single, enjoy being your own person. It should never be a question about what you have to do to win them back. True love happens, it isn't a game, although sometimes we are fooled into thinking its true love. People break up for a lot of reasons and after a lot of healing you can look back at those reasons with a clear head and decide if they are justified and forgiveable.

[daphne]

good original post. even better follow up post blackangel. congrats.