okc85 Posted September 23, 2013 Share Posted September 23, 2013 So basically, I have really strong feelings for my friend. She knows, she's known for a long time. She keeps telling me that she really wants me in her life, that she thinks I'm a great friend, and maybe her feelings for me will evolve over time. Well. It hurts to imagine not having her in my life anymore, but I also don't know how I'll move on if I'm always waiting for the moment when she'll just magically realize that she's into me and will date me. I mean, she'll kiss me sometimes and act like she's into me, but the next day she's really 'cold.' She says it's because I ask 'too many questions' and never take anything slow. I guess that's fair. I don't know. Sometimes I think I'm OK with just being friends. I really like her and enjoy her in my life. Other times I wonder what I'll do when she starts dating someone. And what if I'm holding myself back from meeting someone because I'm waiting for her to change her mind? I dunno. I don't really understand why she won't take a chance. I get the feeling she likes me sometimes. But then she retreats... Should I just move on or try to reconcile my own feelings and accept her as a friend? Link to post Share on other sites
Da Lonely 1 Posted September 23, 2013 Share Posted September 23, 2013 It's time to pop the question. In other words, ask her out. If she hesitates or says no, keep her as a good friend. Of course you want more and that's understandable. However, do make an effort now. The fact she's kissing you is a good sign. Link to post Share on other sites
xXCountryXx Posted September 23, 2013 Share Posted September 23, 2013 This is exactly what happened to me. Odds are, she may find a replacement for you and she will try to kill your feelings with space. Only remain friends if you think you can handle it. I wasn't able to do it, but maybe you can. Experience tells me that it can't happen though. Too much emotionally invested in her to see her getting friendly with other guys. Don't put yourself through the torture. Link to post Share on other sites
xXCountryXx Posted September 23, 2013 Share Posted September 23, 2013 That's if you ask her and she rejects you. It will get weird. Good luck if you ask. Link to post Share on other sites
julia12 Posted September 23, 2013 Share Posted September 23, 2013 Hi there, You sound like a really nice guy, and this situation seems to be wearing you out a bit. (You don't need me to tell you that). I agree with the other person on here who said that it might be time to ask her out "properly", without getting too heavy or confrontational. You do deserve a straight answer! If she says no, or blows hot and cold, would it be a good idea for you to leave her alone for a bit, go and pursue other friendships and dates, if you feel up to it? Just for your own sanity and enjoyment. It can be tough just being friends with someone who you have strong feelings for (most of us have been there). That way, you wouldn't have to cut her out of your life completely. I know all this sounds a bit trite and tired, but you sound like you're running yourself ragged and you deserve some peace and fun! Link to post Share on other sites
Author okc85 Posted September 25, 2013 Author Share Posted September 25, 2013 Thanks everyone. I think it's best for me to move on. I don't think she is ever going to like me as anything more than a friend. Link to post Share on other sites
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