KuntryGirl Posted September 25, 2013 Share Posted September 25, 2013 Hello LS. I'm a newbie here so please go easy on me. LOL I am 32 and my bf is 27. We have been together for almost a year. Weve been friends for almost 5 years. We are together almost everyday. I love him and I do trust him for the most part, I mean I dont think he would ever cheat on me. He has been pretty upfront our entire relationship. There may be some communication problems between the both of us, because he is not really the type of guy that expresses his feelings well and if I try to tell him how I feel about certain things he does, he takes it the wrong way and we end up in a spat or just dropping the topic altogether to avoid a spat and then nothing gets resolved. My problem is with his female friends. Well there is one in particular that really makes me uneasy. He talks to her on the phone and texts her occasionally. He doesnt do it in my face. If he is with me and she happens to call or text he will tell her that he is with me and he will hit her up later. I dont know her personally but i hate her. I know that he talks to her when we arent together because i seen the call log on his phone when i was using it one day. I asked him about her and he tells me that she is just a friend and she talks to him about her relationship problems and asks him for advice. Well i see it as a shoulder to cry on becomes a dick to ride on. Im really struggling with this because i dont want to make a mountain out of mole hill. But, I am super jealous of this woman. She's not even that attractive. She doesnt work. She smokes marijuana. I know that looks dont even matter but i hate that i feel threatened by her. My BF smokes pot too and I dont, but Ive never judged him for that. He is an adult and he works and takes care of his business. He doesnt let his smoking affect his life. I take care of my business too though. I work and go to school. I'm very independent. I know our age difference may have something to do with our lack of communication but I feel like he thinks this woman is better than me in some ways. (more fun, more interesting, better personality, easier to talk to) When we are apart we dont really have much to talk about because we are together so much. When we do talk on the phone it's like a few minutes of basic chit chat and then SILENCE. When this happens I feel like he would rather be talking to her instead of me. Or, even if we are together and we're just lounging around doing nothing, I feel like he would rather be with her getting high instead of doing nothing with me. I dont know how to bring this up to him, or if i should at all. Like i said i dont want to make a big deal out of nothing. I'm not really sure he even thinks about her like that. I just need reassurance that he doesnt and i dont know how to go about bringing it up. I would really like an outsiders perspective. How do i bring it up to him without looking like the jealous,insecure girlfriend?? Or should I just try to focus on our relationship and keep my assumptions to myself? Link to post Share on other sites
Author KuntryGirl Posted September 26, 2013 Author Share Posted September 26, 2013 Thanx East Coaster :-) your reply actually made me LOL for real. It made me feel a little better too. I hate to think or act like I'm better than anyone but I know that she is not ALL THAT in any sense. Even though I didn't mention welfare in my post it seems like you are familiar with her kind. She does have a couple of kids that her mother cares for most of the time and she does live on government assistance. I found out most of my info from her FB page. Anyways I'm not the kinda person to judge someone else's situation. I just sometimes I wish I could seem less boring. *sighs* Link to post Share on other sites
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