2 months NC and still hurting why!!

[hurts2death]

lets all the dumpees here think of the longterm......

 

the past aint gonna be erased....so its better we the dumpees....

 

i would never like to be a dumper. and cary all my life the guilt..

 

(i talk about serious long term mature relationships).

[reddragon588]

but his life is going great. hes got someone he loves he is getting on. my life is falling apart i have no one to love and nothing to look forward to. i cat wish him anything. he has broke my heart the only thing i have going for me is that i never once ave begged or cried or pleaded for him to come back. he probably doesnt even know how much im hurt i have not contacted him at all. i couldnt now anyway because i dont know where he is

 

Try finding something to look forward to.

 

Splurge and buy tickets to a concert with friends.

 

You need to put in the effort to make yourself happy.

[lizzy_00]

send_me_flowers I am so sorry to hear this, I feel your pain and I hope you heal soon

Please realize that he is NOT your soul mate, he doesn't deserve the slightest bit of your attention.

Try not thinking about him, like every time you think of him, just swich your thoughts deliberately. I know it will seem impossible at first, but it will make such a massive difference after some time.

Focus on yourself, keep yourself busy - this helped me so much. Life has amazing things planned for you, you will meet the love of your life once you overcome this person. He is just a lesson. Focus on you and promise yourself to make the rest of your life the best of your life!

[send_me_flowers]

send_me_flowers I am so sorry to hear this, I feel your pain and I hope you heal soon

Please realize that he is NOT your soul mate, he doesn't deserve the slightest bit of your attention.

Try not thinking about him, like every time you think of him, just swich your thoughts deliberately. I know it will seem impossible at first, but it will make such a massive difference after some time.

Focus on yourself, keep yourself busy - this helped me so much. Life has amazing things planned for you, you will meet the love of your life once you overcome this person. He is just a lesson. Focus on you and promise yourself to make the rest of your life the best of your life!

 

 

thank you izzy hes not my soul mate he is a heartless man who has hurt me deeply im going to wish him the best and move on with my life i have to or i will become very ill. maybe god introduced me to him to help him in his time of need

[send_me_flowers]

lets all the dumpees here think of the longterm......

 

the past aint gonna be erased....so its better we the dumpees....

 

i would never like to be a dumper. and cary all my life the guilt..

 

(i talk about serious long term mature relationships).

 

hey j i thank you from the boyyom of my heary for all your wisdom and kind advice

 

thank you so much, for talking with me,

 

maybe my ex will never have guilt or shame of how hes treated me i would probably never know anyway.

 

i just cant see it though i have no choice but to heal and move on i wouldnt even be able to find him anyhow hs a lost course and in the arms of another maybe they deserve each other

[send_me_flowers]

Most of you will know my story.

 

 

Well I have been in NC for 2months. My ex fiance. Left me for a girl he knew before me and I recently found out that they are living together and the girl is pregeant, I though I was doing well and getting myself back on track. But it has knocked me physically ill. I have not slept for 2 days I can't eat I am in an awful place I don't know how things have ended this way it has came in threes for me. I suppose now I know why he never rang me or came to see me 2 months ago now.

 

 

In just really sad and lost. I feel so numb I have been crying my eyes out constantly, I hate how I can't get past this. He has the life we planned and it pains me so much. I wish to god this pain will leave me,

[Salvatore85]

This is why keeping tabs on your ex is such an awful thing to do. It's so incredibly unhealthy and you've given yourself no time whatsoever to come to the realization that it's over and really begin the grieving and healing process. I'm sorry you're going through this but you've got to get your act together. Enough with the social media or however you keep finding out what he's up to because it's not hurting anyone but you.

[organizedchaos]

Most of you will know my story.

 

 

Well I have been in NC for 2months. My ex fiance. Left me for a girl he knew before me and I recently found out that they are living together and the girl is pregeant, I though I was doing well and getting myself back on track. But it has knocked me physically ill. I have not slept for 2 days I can't eat I am in an awful place I don't know how things have ended this way it has came in threes for me. I suppose now I know why he never rang me or came to see me 2 months ago now.

 

 

In just really sad and lost. I feel so numb I have been crying my eyes out constantly, I hate how I can't get past this. He has the life we planned and it pains me so much. I wish to god this pain will leave me,

 

Well if it has only been two months, and his gf is already pregnant, I kind of doubt this will go well for him in the long or even short term. He is in for a world of hurt in the not so distant future.

[Bubberfly]

This is why keeping tabs on your ex is such an awful thing to do. It's so incredibly unhealthy and you've given yourself no time whatsoever to come to the realization that it's over and really begin the grieving and healing process. I'm sorry you're going through this but you've got to get your act together. Enough with the social media or however you keep finding out what he's up to because it's not hurting anyone but you.

 

This is perfectly said.

I recently found myself doing something stupid and searching my ex on facebook. And by ex I mean, we broke up 10 years ago and I've had LTRs since. There he is, looking dapper in a tux with his new bride. See when I was with him he vowed to never get married. I was seething. Until I realized how ridiculous I was being, and it was my own darn fault for searching for him LOL.

 

If you can block your ex, do so. Do the old rubberband trick and snap yourself every time you find yourself wanting to do a search. Focus on your own life and all the blessings you do have. You didn't end up pregnant with a cheater

[hurts2death]

you are welcome send me flowers...

[Emotions]

I understand how you feel. I'm on one week no contact. The guy I was dating lied to me about being single and was still in a relationship with his girlfriend/child's mother. When I called and texted him asking why he lied to me, he never responded. I too was there for him and stood by his side and he can't even apologize to me for lying to me and hurting me. He told me she had cheated on him in the past yet he continues to stay with her.

 

I too don't understand how these men can be so heartless to those who gave their heart to them. I'm still very hurt...my heart starts racing if I think about him....I wish I were 2 months into no contact like you are.

 

We will make it......bc we have no other choice. These two selfish bastards won't ever apologize to us for their decisions.

[send_me_flowers]

I understand how you feel. I'm on one week no contact. The guy I was dating lied to me about being single and was still in a relationship with his girlfriend/child's mother. When I called and texted him asking why he lied to me, he never responded. I too was there for him and stood by his side and he can't even apologize to me for lying to me and hurting me. He told me she had cheated on him in the past yet he continues to stay with her.

 

I too don't understand how these men can be so heartless to those who gave their heart to them. I'm still very hurt...my heart starts racing if I think about him....I wish I were 2 months into no contact like you are.

 

We will make it......bc we have no other choice. These two selfish bastards won't ever apologize to us for their decisions.

 

im sorry its bloody hard, my ex said sorry on the previous times to get me hanging on. but obviously he never meant that its unbelieveable how they cant switch of makes me think he had no real feelings for me at all.

 

the pain is the worse kind isnt it how long NC you been. i am 2 months it gets harder as it goes on because you know that they dont care to check and thats its over

 

im having trouble accepting that i will never hear or see him again. i miss him because i love him and i shouldnt, it broke my heart when he had another tattoo i was in denal first but it was obvious that he cheated he stoll denied it. 2 months back he said we would meet up face to face but he never did i never contacted him again

[send_me_flowers]

hello everyone

 

how to accepte and overcome the reailty you will never see your ex bf its 2 monnths and no contact its finally hit me hes over me for good

[mtnbiker3000]

Yeah, there's something about the 2 month mark. Well, now you know and can really start to make some progress at moving on... Whatever you do, don't break NC!!!

[lauri]

Hey,

 

I know that you are hurting, especially because your ex finance is now living with another woman and she is pregnant.

 

It may be hard to accept now, but you should be relieved you are no longer with a person like this. The best thing to do is just realize that YOU are a good catch and the only person who matters right now is YOU.

 

Realizing its finally over is difficult, its hard to accept and its one of the saddest moments we have to go through. Have you been checking social media?

[send_me_flowers]

Yeah, there's something about the 2 month mark. Well, now you know and can really start to make some progress at moving on... Whatever you do, don't break NC!!!

 

im not going to make NC with him he is over me but i just need to accept that and its hard i dont know how to get this dull feeling out of my heart:sick:

[mtnbiker3000]

With NC, time and taking positive steps at recovering and moving on. There are no shortcuts. You must put in the work. But when you do, you will come out even stronger and wiser than before.

[send_me_flowers]

Hey,

 

I know that you are hurting, especially because your ex finance is now living with another woman and she is pregnant.

 

It may be hard to accept now, but you should be relieved you are no longer with a person like this. The best thing to do is just realize that YOU are a good catch and the only person who matters right now is YOU.

 

Realizing its finally over is difficult, its hard to accept and its one of the saddest moments we have to go through. Have you been checking social media?

 

thanks for the reply i havent been checking on his fb....

 

i wish i knew how to accepte that hes gone.

 

and i wish i didnt love him im suffering hes living happy its unfair

[headinthecloud]

When you go through a BU you experience a similar situation to experiencing the death of a friend or family member. There are 5 stages of loss and grief. It sounds like you're coming out of denial.

 

The 5 Stages of Loss and Grief | Psych Central

 

There are good days and bad days. On the bad days, keep yourself busy - go to the gym, hangout with friends, get out of the house - do not allow yourself to sit and wallow in sadness. I kept a journal and wrote down everything I wanted to tell him that I'll never have an opportunity to share. Post on here. And start putting all that energy into yourself. Focus on bettering yourself.

 

Also, checkout posts from Barky2 and Oracle, among others, as they offer some of the best advice you'll come across. Be strong, you're not alone.

[send_me_flowers]

With NC, time and taking positive steps at recovering and moving on. There are no shortcuts. You must put in the work. But when you do, you will come out even stronger and wiser than before.

 

thank you just has each day passes im going its getting harder for me he hasnt made any way of contacting me

[send_me_flowers]

When you go through a BU you experience a similar situation to experiencing the death of a friend or family member. There are 5 stages of loss and grief. It sounds like you're coming out of denial.

 

The 5 Stages of Loss and Grief | Psych Central

 

There are good days and bad days. On the bad days, keep yourself busy - go to the gym, hangout with friends, get out of the house - do not allow yourself to sit and wallow in sadness. I kept a journal and wrote down everything I wanted to tell him that I'll never have an opportunity to share. Post on here. And start putting all that energy into yourself. Focus on bettering yourself.

 

Also, checkout posts from Barky2 and Oracle, among others, as they offer some of the best advice you'll come across. Be strong, you're not alone.

 

thank you im just really cut into 2. i just dont get how he can be so mean to me to just forget me alltogether

[send_me_flowers]

When you go through a BU you experience a similar situation to experiencing the death of a friend or family member. There are 5 stages of loss and grief. It sounds like you're coming out of denial.

 

The 5 Stages of Loss and Grief | Psych Central

 

There are good days and bad days. On the bad days, keep yourself busy - go to the gym, hangout with friends, get out of the house - do not allow yourself to sit and wallow in sadness. I kept a journal and wrote down everything I wanted to tell him that I'll never have an opportunity to share. Post on here. And start putting all that energy into yourself. Focus on bettering yourself.

 

Also, checkout posts from Barky2 and Oracle, among others, as they offer some of the best advice you'll come across. Be strong, you're not alone.

i am trying i just feel really sad and hopeless. i feel that the fact i was so loyal and faithfull he was planing cheating on me and also that he has never admitted to cheating and now they are so happy the only thing i have is that he lives far away so i wont have to see him. he has really crushed my heart and i cant get back up

[h0000]

After getting hurt during my previous relationships I just decided not to fall in love anymore.I just like, really like..but I hold back soon as I start to fall in love.

[send_me_flowers]

After getting hurt during my previous relationships I just decided not to fall in love anymore.I just like, really like..but I hold back soon as I start to fall in love.

 

i have been feeling that way i said to myself i will never fall in love again!! like you they have all failed on me. im the one left hurting and crying but this one is hard i was meant to be getting married he gave me false hope and empty promieses he knew i was badly hurt before him he promised he wouldnt hurt me and he has hurt me more than my last ex.

[headinthecloud]

After getting hurt during my previous relationships I just decided not to fall in love anymore.I just like, really like..but I hold back soon as I start to fall in love.

 

I'm sorry that you were hurt but closing yourself off from others makes you emotionally unavailable and you'll miss out on life. "Love like you've never been hurt." To love someone with all your heart takes a lot of courage but always love yourself first. You deserve great love, but you have to risk your heart to find it. Otherwise, you risk living a superficial life where you never really commit to anyone or anything. Don't lose all hope in others. Be compassionate to both yourself and others.