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I have just listened to the voicemail from my exmm saying that he lives on his own and is signing the divorce papers in a weeks time - I am literally in shock. The divorce has been dragging on for a year and a half so far and now he arranged it within 2 weeks????

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Happy for you, as I know that's what you wanted. Just remember that he needs time to heal and you guys need to reset and start fresh in order to build something healthy.

 

Stay strong! Sending good vibes for you.

 

ANd yes... send additional info when you get it, because you're right the timeline doesn't add up.

 

How are you feeling?

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wait until you see the divorce papers...

 

Exactly.

 

Also, why would he tell you before? It's NOT a done deal until those papers are signed!

 

Even if it is true, do NOT go jumping back into his arms. He HAS to be on his own for a while to sort stuff out and just to be alone and not have a woman in his life.

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My only response to that sort of phone call would be "That's great...tell me about it would in 2 weeks.". Then maybe I'd also seek clarification on what that means. And it's not a done deal until the JUDGE signs the papers and you see the final decree in writing.

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thank you all for all your words, there is an update: as he kept writing and wanted me to pick up the phone, I replied asking what papers is he actually signing, and saying that for me he is married until the decree absolute is granted, he wrote back saying that they are the last financial papers before decree absolute is applied for, and that he will come to me when I want and in the meantime he is mine and will wait. I stay NC now.

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I have just listened to the voicemail from my exmm saying that he lives on his own and is signing the divorce papers in a weeks time - I am literally in shock. The divorce has been dragging on for a year and a half so far and now he arranged it within 2 weeks????

Sufficiently motivated, as long as the paperwork is properly filed and the cooling off period, if any, has run, a divorce can happen remarkably fast. I recall, after interminable delays due to improper filings, my exW and I went down to the court, got the filings right, asked for judgment by mail and had our dissolution the next business day, meaning the stamped judgment in our hands delivered in the envelopes we had provided with postage metered. Done.

 

Sufficient motivation.

 

You should be able to track the case summary with the court, either online or in person, as it is a public record. With ours, I could see all the botched filings and the entire case summary history online. So could anyone else who knew my name.

 

Good luck.

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