ex gf wants to try to be friends again; i am not over her and want to marry her!

[Mary3]

Please do NOT respond to her anymore. She is openly bothered that you have gotten on with your life. Now get on with it !

 

She will never go back to being that wonderful girlfriend you used to know.

 

Don't waste your precious life, thoughts , time, or anything else on her

 

Don't give her the satisfaction of future responses

 

Let her think you have a gf....Thats eating her.....Its the end for her as far as you go

[theone44]

Originally posted by lifeboy

Hey well thanks for all your insights. I have spoken to many people and the majority of people said it would be best if I emailed her back and just said i didnt want to be "just friends" as she desired (See initial post for her email). so here is what i wrote to her:

 

"i think it’s best if we go our separate ways.

i’ll look back on our time together and enjoy the

memories. we definitely had good times over the past

three years. i wish you all the best and know

you’ll dominate in whatever it is you do.

take care."

 

 

it's just short and to the point. i dont think i really owe her any long emotional email. that crap is in the past and me sayiing my feelings for her and so forth all happened back in the day. i dont know why she thinks i owe her my friendship. but anyway, here is her extremely bitter response to my email:

 

"well...you have obviously perfected the sterile,

emotionless business sensibility into your writing,

and have incorporated it into everyday use. i am glad

you will "look back" over our "good" times. let me

give you some advice...when you are writing an email

in which your intention is to make yourself a stranger

to someone who knows you as well as i do, try not to

insult their feelings by making it sound as if you

never really knew the person at all. it just isn't

cool. this isnt the new accounting firm you'll be working at, alright? it is

me...and i hate businessy s**t, especially businessy

s**t combined with you saying you never want to see me

again. it sucks enough already. and please...don't

drop the i wish you luck in all your future endeavors

line. not needed.

that is all

bye jim"

 

well this is so bitter and i feel i dont deserve this . i certainly am not going to respond. it is DONE. but i cant help but notice how she was apparently (in her initial email) "so proud" of me landing my first real job at a great firm, and now in this email she rips on me as being "businessy". i think my email to her was concise and not businessy at all. i just think this girl - a girl who rarely is told "no" and usually gets what she wants - just cannot believe the fact that someone denied her something she wanted.

 

finally, she calls it sterile and emotionless writing. well i have news for her; just look back on when she dumped me and all the crying, the deep email i sent her professing all my feelings, the times when we got back together and i told lher how much i loved her and all. she doesnt deserve me telling her that stuff anymore. she had her chance. i dont see why a girl that wants to be "Just friends" cannot handle this. it shouldnt be that horrific. i mean she has gone 2 whole months without me talking to her. why does she have to blow up at me for just reaffirminig in text that i dont want to see her or talk to her? what a wreck! i think it's absurd and i think she just is scared that now the security blanket she THOUGHT she had, in case playing the field and testing the waters didnt work out, is gone. bottom line; i dont deserve this and i am respecting her desire not to be my gf. i have backed off and not begged for her back since the first week she dumped me months ago. why cant she give me the same respect regarding my lack of desire to be "just friends."?

 

 

 

 

Man,or u a man or a mice. I thought you said you ,where smarter than she ,if u send that letter your are really showing her she the smart one and you the weak one. She only going to read it laugh and say to herself i am glad i got rid of this needy,clingy,weakling of a man. Now i'm going to find myself a real man with a backbone,and going to put me in my place once in a while. (get my drift) You send that it's only going to make you a bigger fool than her. From my experience with women once they leave me ....they gone....and the only reason i will take her back,if she tell me she sorry for leaving me. The"just friend" is just to sting you along,if she want a friend go get a dog or a cat.

[lifeboy]

theone44

 

maybe i am not smart. but i certainly am at least smart enough to know that your spelling and grammatical skills are enough to drive someone using "hooked on fonix" insane. your post is just beyond ambiguous. im not quite clear as to what part of my email to her is weak. please be a little more articulate so i can go ahead and be a productive guy. and please, try to spell basic words correctly (yes, even if it might lessen the extent of your "manhood") so that this will all be a little easier on me. thanks champ.

[theone44]

Originally posted by lifeboy

theone44

 

maybe i am not smart. but i certainly am at least smart enough to know that your spelling and grammatical skills are enough to drive someone using "hooked on fonix" insane. your post is just beyond ambiguous. im not quite clear as to what part of my email to her is weak. please be a little more articulate so i can go ahead and be a productive guy. and please, try to spell basic words correctly (yes, even if it might lessen the extent of your "manhood") so that this will all be a little easier on me. thanks champ.

 

 

 

 

When a woman break it off with someone she have reason in doing so. Some men just don't get it when it come to woman. I 'm a straight-forward kind of guy. (Boy you are so right. my gram-mer is bad). Where is the hook-on-fonic?

 

I have talk and chatted with several women. and here some of the reason they have told me

 

1.no more challenge

2.a needy,clingy, weak man

3.boring

4. calling her to often

5. no more excitement in the relationship

6 .to emotional attach to her

7. to available

8. not giving her any respect anymore

9. bad behavior

10. her need is not being met anymore .

 

The one thing women hate about men the most .is when they break it off or leave. Is when a man start begging,pleading,writing letter or sending flower. trying to get them back. which don't work anyhow. These same women told that it make a ma look weak,pathetic with no backbone.

 

 

Women want men who are strong,confidence and not angry,pathetic cry-baby,that can live with-out them.

 

Once a woman break-up with you. just leave her alone. no letter,no e-mail,no text,no contact what-so-ever. You got to disappear like a "Ghost",and show this woman that you are a strong,confidence,stable man,and you not to be disrespect,misuse and string along like a dog.

 

 

What you need to do man is back off and let her come after you again. Give her the silent treatment and see what happen. I promise you,if you follow some these rule i have given you. this woman will be back in your hand like putty. and she will be a whole difference person,because she is going to see that your are a strong man. and not going take anymore of her mess..

 

 

"Don't Send the letter",but send it later on. down the line once. you and her have gotten back on good term first.

[lifeboy]

the one

 

points well taken. thanks. i have actually been ignoring her for now more than two months. complete NOTHING. i have not even come close to begging or sending flowers or any of that stuff. i dont know where you got the idea that im doing those kinds of things. i have given this girl NOTHING in the past two months. i plan on continuing to do the same. it was never my intent to weaken up and cry to her or any of that crap. hell i am missing her less and less every day now because of my complete no contact. anyway thanks for your help.

[theone44]

Originally posted by lifeboy

the one

 

points well taken. thanks. i have actually been ignoring her for now more than two months. complete NOTHING. i have not even come close to begging or sending flowers or any of that stuff. i dont know where you got the idea that im doing those kinds of things. i have given this girl NOTHING in the past two months. i plan on continuing to do the same. it was never my intent to weaken up and cry to her or any of that crap. hell i am missing her less and less every day now because of my complete no contact. anyway thanks for your help.

 

 

 

Ok. you doing great. just keep doing the no contact thing. some people don't think it doesn't,but it does. It make u a much stronger person,and it make the dumper. to start thinking. Two months. wow man it's been almost 6 months since my ex left me. Yes,i mist miss her a lot,but what can i do about it."nothing" I did get about 4 mysterious phone from her,but no messages. Women are emotional creature. sometime. they don't even know what the heck they are doing. You talking about a bunch of nut-cases

 

Just stay away from here. just be strong man. I will never again. allow a woman to run over me again,and you wonder why a lot of men are sitting up in the jail-house,because of some crazy woman...i bet you...

 

Just play hard to get with this girl when she start calling you again.and don't give in to her so quickly. Make her earn he way back into your life,and don't take no more crap from this woman. I not talking about being mean,disrespectful or rule toward her. you know what i mean.

 

Man be tough,confidence and have a zero to no tolerance non-sense. when it come to women. Women want strong men,not no mamma boy's

[julieg]

ldear lifeboy,

 

i am a woman who is presently successful and happy with everything i could ever want. ......

 

flashback 15+ years ago to the young girl i once was. i was in a solid 4 year relationship with a wonderful guy (i'll call him mark.) Mark was everything a girl could dream of: athletic, great personality, handsome, fantastic boyfriend. etc it was love at first sight for me and i to this day still remember the first time i ever noticed him and get a rush. he and i fell hard for each other but in many ways it seemed to me that he was the more "in love" person. maybe i was holding back - who in the world after all "settles on" the first real love interest in their life. i really could have married this guy one day but i broke it off anyway. after four years i told mark that it just wasn't working anymore. what was i to do? keep on dating the same guy without seeing what else is in the world.? we corresponded less and less over the intial breakup with him doing most of the initiating. word got back to me that he had a new serious girlfirend and i always had this on my mind. your ex's replies remind me of my state of mind at the same time.

 

i like your girlfriend never had a hard time meeting new guys and this kept my mind off of missing mark for many years. i pursued the successful career and eventually got all the nice things that one would want including a successful husband and adorable children.

 

all this brings me to my point. i know now that mark is someone i could have been ultimately with had i not broke it off. i look back with regrets often because he was one of the great loves of my life. he like you had it all but i was not smart enough at the time to realize what i had was one in a million. i hear that midlife crisis can occur and for me i will forever haunted by what if. would this help him now to know that i eventually suffered and regretted my decision to break it off? i do not think that it would erase any of the pain i had caused in that period of our lives. i am sure he would love to hear from me and me from him but what is past is gone forever. what we become is the sum of all our life experiences and we can only appreciate some things fully when we look back on them from a distance. this is one of life's hard lessons. i hioe that this helps

[lifeboy]

hey all, thanks for your insight. it means so much that you actually care to respond to me.

 

here is like a mini update (it's mini because i dont contact her or anything)

 

anyway, like the day after she sent that nasty email to me, she saw my name signed into this one internet message board that we both post on. so she called me, but of course i didnt pick up. anyway, then last night, i was logged into that same message board and she obviously saw my name again. so she decided to send me a private message (PM). it reads as follows:

 

"hey jim

 

i know you aren't going to respond but every time i see you on the rhombus (the name of our message board) i just want to say hi. wish things could have been different with us post breakup. i miss you. "

 

i mean GOD. this just annoys me. like it doesnt help my cause in getting over her. and i dont think it's fair that i have to stop visiting or posting on this site just because she is CONSTANTLY ON IT. just like so many things in life, i was the one that showed this particular message board to her. it wasnt the other way around. so i dont feel as though i should give up a little online community i enjoy. it's BS. like why the heck does she have to send me these dumb (and hurtful) private messages???

 

one other thing is that she is ALWAYS on this site. like all she does is go to class and is constantly logged into this site. like EVERY TIME i am on, her name is on. and also, my other friend who uses it too always sees her logged in when he is on. i mean it's so absurd and it's annoying. sorry to vent. just i wish she would stop hurting me by contacting. GOD

[lifeboy]

sorry have to keep ranting

 

i mean "i wish things could have been different with us post break up"

 

SCREW YOU. like it's COMPLETELY her fault that things are shoddy. she honestly thinks that dumping me, then taking me back, then basically saying she doesnt know if it's right will merit me REMAINING HER FRIEND????

 

FOOL. SUCH A FOOL. this chick is the epitome of MORON.

 

i hope she knows it's HER FAULT. whatever i am just so bitter right now. like she just SITS on her computer all day.

is this that great life of independence she was seeking? is this seriously better than being with me?

 

i mean all she does is post meaningless junk on this message board. i mean just so pointless. her favorite thing though is like posting in the "post yourself" thread where you put up pictures of yourself. of course all the guys (it's a predominantly male message board) gawk and are like "wow you are the most beautiful girl on this board, or youare so hot; or just WOW". i mean god she is the ultimate compliment seeker. it's just so annoying

 

i cant help but call her an online whore (sorry if that is innapropriate). i mean god we all know you're hot. stop being such a compliment seeker. like what is she waiting for>>> go out and date someone or whatever. this is absurd. why the heck do you still try to say hi to me when you explicitly state "i know you wont respond"/

 

what is she trying to be the post break up "good guy"???? GET A LIFE YOU ONLINE WHORE

[crazydawg]

Amen.

[Weird]

Dude, I hear you loud and clear. What you describe how she is acting is how many women act that I know of who have dated friends. My ex did that crap too saying she wished things could be diff after break-up etc etc etc and it is pure crap as you obviously know. Gah, damn selfish humans:(

 

What is the site you post at? I want to peep some of her meaningless messages:)