emva07 Posted October 2, 2013 Share Posted October 2, 2013 Hello, So my sister just graduated high school in may (19) and got her first job at a local pharmacy/convenience store. She has been there for a few months now and she is still horrible at customer service, doesn't say hi to the customers, doesn't smile, sulks like she is too good to be there, doesn't take initiative and overall negative. Whenever the managers or my cousin (got her the job, and cashier supervisor) tell her anything she gets angry, or starts crying saying that she is not that bad so what do they want from her? They have been cutting her hours drastically, which has her upset, but instead of seeing within, she goes on jealous rants about how the other cashiers are goody two shoes. Her melting point came on Sunday when they called her to not come in at all. We have been telling her to better her customer service skills because it's a tough economy and she is lucky she got that job. She sees it as us being mean to her and that nobody gets her. So instead of getting better at work, she sulks even more. My mom is worried because she wants her daughter to get out into the real world, gain people skills that she will need for the future. She says "i wont be around forever and I want to be glad that I leave you guys knowing that you are prepared" My mom will have a talk with her, but other than that I just don't know what we can do anymore!!! My mom isn't in a financial position to be providing for her spoiled wants (concerts, shoes, clothes, eating out) so she needs that job in order to fund her lavish ways. So in other words, yes, it is very important for her to keep this job. She claims to be saving for college but her money just goes towards her fun. To be honest, if she can't even having a part-time job, I don't think she will be able to handle school AND job. She will go nuts. Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted October 2, 2013 Share Posted October 2, 2013 What she wants is to be funded, so she blameshifts on others. You can't really convince her, you have to let her crash and burn and hit rock bottom before she will do anything for herself. PS: I'm talking from partially my own experience. Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted October 2, 2013 Share Posted October 2, 2013 Still to young to know better, takes life not seriously yet. Working at CVS or Walgreen's isn't a happy place to work. She wouldn't be there in the first place. Don't even think she could work at a local Supermarket or Fast Food Drive Thru would help either. Her intent is not to be there at this job, but still rather have the money given to her so she can buy stuff she really don't need. Sending her to College will be worst than you think. This girl isn't ready for that life yet. She might need a 1 year off to think it out. Or she might never end up going to College. Best to bring her home and leave her there for now. Not harsh but this type of girl doesn't care about anything except herself. Unless you have a grandma she could go and stay with. Might learn how to cook and take care of the house. She might be better off with someone who has enough money so she doesn't have to work or even clean and take care of the housework. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author emva07 Posted October 2, 2013 Author Share Posted October 2, 2013 Still to young to know better, takes life not seriously yet. Working at CVS or Walgreen's isn't a happy place to work. She wouldn't be there in the first place. Don't even think she could work at a local Supermarket or Fast Food Drive Thru would help either. Her intent is not to be there at this job, but still rather have the money given to her so she can buy stuff she really don't need. Sending her to College will be worst than you think. This girl isn't ready for that life yet. She might need a 1 year off to think it out. Or she might never end up going to College. Best to bring her home and leave her there for now. Not harsh but this type of girl doesn't care about anything except herself. Unless you have a grandma she could go and stay with. Might learn how to cook and take care of the house. She might be better off with someone who has enough money so she doesn't have to work or even clean and take care of the housework. Yeah....this isn't an option..... If my mom tells her there isn't enough money for say, a $160 concert....she throws a fit, slams doors until my mom gives her the card and my mom has to find another way to make ends meet. She likes working, because it means money to buy stuff without mom saying no. The problem is she wants to have this job with the least effort possible. One day she wanted to go to the beach....she had to work instead so faked this panic attack at work....my mom took her to the hospital, they prescribed her anti-depressants, funnily enough, next day she was cooling it with her friends all weekend long. Meanwhile my mom is all worried when in reality there's nothing to worry about. I got so mad. She has my mom convinced she has depression, coincidentally she is only depressed at work....once she's home or out with friends the depression is miraculously gone! But we can't tell her she's not depressed because she has another "incident". Yeah my mom has expressed that she will probably never end up going to college....when family asks her she gives a half ass answer but you can just tell she wants to say "no" Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted October 2, 2013 Share Posted October 2, 2013 Your mom needs to correct this and don't give in to giving her money for any nonsense. Bills come first and food. Your sister now knows how to get what she wants from your mom. That's problem number 1. Can't be weak with your sister, your mom will do anything for her but your sister intent is to get what she can and don't do anything else if she doesn't have to do it. Work place she should not be working, as she is just doing what she wants there. They will not want her to continue working at this rate. That panic attack at her job and forcing your mother to rush her to hospital over it and that turns out to be another fake drama. Is there anyone else in your family there just you, sister and mom? Your mom can put your sister in program to teach her lesson to grown up. Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted October 2, 2013 Share Posted October 2, 2013 I really don't want to scare you, but if this problem is not fixed now, in time it will be impossible to fix, as the personality sort of sets in. Your mom is an enabler, and unless she stops and lets her crash and burn, nothing will change. Finally, is your sister a looker ?; can she fall back on that if she doesn't grow up ? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
HokeyReligions Posted October 2, 2013 Share Posted October 2, 2013 Cut her off completely. Your mom needs help to do this. Its very hard on parents and this behavior hurts your mom terribly I'm sure. Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted October 2, 2013 Share Posted October 2, 2013 She needs to leave the house for good. Too harsh but your mom has to say "LISTEN! THIS NONSENSE BEHAVIOR HAS TO END HERE RIGHT NOW! Your going to have to move out and live with _________ (this would be another family member) But in most cases she'll end up at home but restricted. Your mom has to be more aggressive with her daughter and not give in all the time. Easy to say this but not much else she can do with her. Otherwise this will just get worst and worst. She could be bragging to her friends how she is running her home instead of her mother. That's a shame if she's really doing that. But we all know what she's doing and her intent is that she can get away with it because your mother allows her and gives in to her to easy! Link to post Share on other sites
DaisyLeigh1967 Posted October 5, 2013 Share Posted October 5, 2013 This is mostly your parents' fault. Your mother is stupid to keep giving to the spoiled little bitch, so blame her. She cannot whine and complain about being unable to make ends meet if she is funding your brat sister's whiny wants. She is an adult. They could put her ass out on the street and she would HAVE to fend for herself. It is time that someone told her that life is not fair, that she is not entitled to anything she doesn't work for, and to grow the **** up. Link to post Share on other sites
jimloveslips Posted October 5, 2013 Share Posted October 5, 2013 she needs a real life experience to shock her out of her apathy. and sooner or later she'll get one. it would be nice if it was more controlled - the family telling her to get out and support herself... supportive, but with firm resolve Link to post Share on other sites
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