jay1983 Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 I will say that my Tinder matches are sub par on looks. I'm not a beautiful man, but swiping right or left on a pic is just selling me short. I go out to find women most of the time. I can find more attractive girls that are interested in me in person, so it makes a lot of girls on Tinder not worth my time. So IF I were more of an ******* and with lower standards, I would bang a lot of girls from tinder that I wouldn't date. So I think Jay's comments have some merit. Some of guys start to wonder what's going on, why they're only getting girls who aren't up to par. So they start taking pics of different men and trolling. Then they take screen shots and post them and you can clearly see what's going on. They'll use a pic of a model and get the pretty ones, they'll use a guy who's hot but a step down from Hollywood and get merely cutes girls. Average get unattractive. Last year someone linked a thread on body builder that went on for 50 pages of screen shot after screen shot with girls giving their numbers and agreeing to fu*k. It was funny as sh*t. Also WB's right, the sites are notoriouse for chicks who just wanna chat and never meet in person. I'd say those make for about 50% of the gals on there. Link to post Share on other sites
Oregon_Dude Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 I'm on OKCupid and Tinder. I'm a very normal, intelligent, attractive and talented man. For a while I was taking it personally, getting very few responses. Then I realized: these women get so many messages. Even the unattractive ones. They have infinite choice. There is nothing personal about this; it's just a hugely over-saturated dating market, and the women have all the advantage/power. Best not to take dating too seriously. People have the illusion of always having "something better" around the corner. Problem is, you will never find the perfect person. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BlueIris Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Good article. Thanks for posting it. One thing that struck me were the comments from some of the women that these men they’re having sex with were just not good at it, that those women have better orgasms themselves and with vibrators. If the quality is so low so often, why do they bother having sex with these guys? That just makes no sense to me at all. I’ve heard young women IRL say the same thing about the OLD guys they hookup with, but they just quit hooking up with guys, or quit doing it via tinder, etc. Link to post Share on other sites
loveweary11 Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 FINALLY... There is something published that reflects my experience in the modern world. Link to post Share on other sites
Empyrea Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 I will say that my Tinder matches are sub par on looks. I'm not a beautiful man, but swiping right or left on a pic is just selling me short. I go out to find women most of the time. I can find more attractive girls that are interested in me in person, so it makes a lot of girls on Tinder not worth my time. So IF I were more of an ******* and with lower standards, I would bang a lot of girls from tinder that I wouldn't date. So I think Jay's comments have some merit. How about putting something of substance in the description? If the picture shows me a guy that looks-wise I would consider dating in real life I will click on it - 90% of the time there's NOTHING in the description, 5% of the time just a lame quote. I can't swipe right on just a picture without knowing anything about him. Even if he's hot! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
loveweary11 Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 I will admit I left swiped all night until I got carpals tunnel syndrome though... Didn't find a looker in the bunch when I used that app. Might give it another whirl. Anyone know how to use it without Facebook? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LoveRefreshed Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 How about putting something of substance in the description? If the picture shows me a guy that looks-wise I would consider dating in real life I will click on it - 90% of the time there's NOTHING in the description, 5% of the time just a lame quote. I can't swipe right on just a picture without knowing anything about him. Even if he's hot! Why do you assume I don't have anything written there? I am not a stand up comedian who tells slapstick jokes. I am witty and play on interactions for my humor, so all that is written in mine is that That I am a Chemist, where I am from, and that I am a liberal nerd into led zeppelin and the grateful dead... Music is important in my life and I work my ass off for my job, and I think that is pretty descriptive. What should I put there? Title drop some books so girls think I am well read, use decadently ornate wording so I sound smug and arrogant..er I mean so smart and unique? Link to post Share on other sites
wb1988 Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 (edited) these women get so many messages. Even the unattractive ones. They have infinite choice. There is nothing personal about this; it's just a hugely over-saturated dating market, and the women have all the advantage/power. Not really, actually not at all. All guys message all girls within the area, girls then think that they have so many options and build up too much esteem, girls are left disappointment because their inflated expectations never materialize. On pof a girl after say 2 weeks might get like 100 messages. What she forgets is that the 100 guys also messaged every other girl, so the 100 guys aren't options or even real interests, they might be only 1/50th of an interest because most guys literally message 50+ women on POF when they sign up. The same goes for tinder, when a girl gets a match it's probably with a guy that's swiped yes to 1000 women. On friday I met a girl that said she got over a hundred messages on POF but hasn't got a single date from any of them even after chasing them up on it. The reason to me was obvious, she wasn't very attractive and more like the type of girl you'd message when your worked up in the evening looking for a BJ. I felt bad for her though because unlike many other girls she didn't have an inflated self-worth. Edited August 10, 2015 by wb1988 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Oregon_Dude Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Not really, actually not at all. All guys message all girls within the area, girls then think that they have so many options and build up too much esteem, girls are left disappointment because their inflated expectations never materialize. Interesting. Well, either way, they experience a period of unrealistic expectations and/or perceived value. No wonder when I do get a message back, it's like two weeks after I sent it. Once her options have dried up. Link to post Share on other sites
jay1983 Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Interesting. Well, either way, they experience a period of unrealistic expectations and/or perceived value. No wonder when I do get a message back, it's like two weeks after I sent it. Once her options have dried up. She was proly just bored and decided to message you back or hadn't even logged in for 2 weeks. You think all the girls are going out with the guys on there, but most aren't. They just use the site to flirt and look at pics when they're bored. Link to post Share on other sites
Oregon_Dude Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 She was proly just bored and decided to message you back or hadn't even logged in for 2 weeks. You think all the girls are going out with the guys on there, but most aren't. They just use the site to flirt and look at pics when they're bored.Yeah, maybe. Fair enough. I agree, I'm sure they're using it as attractiveness validation. Personally I just got out of a r/s, tiptoeing back into dating as I know I should, but the whole prospect is depressing and daunting. It's looking like a lot of porn and reading books for a year or two. Link to post Share on other sites
jay1983 Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 It's just way to sleep with unattractive girls. That's what it's there for. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LoveRefreshed Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Just read a profile on Tinder that said "I'm looking for an honest and genuine man. I am hoping for a relationship but I am open to hook ups. I don't have a gag reflex and I love swallowing! :D" babahahaa, and I bet she's going to get so many relationship opportunities. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 What's really sad is that people just give in to the nihilism, as if there's no other option other than what the mainstream steers them to do. Are these people even thinking about where this behavior is leading them? Right off a cliff. It took me a year and a half of pretty focused searching to find a good man who wanted a real, lasting connection and not just a fast food flesh fix. They are still out there - diamonds in the rough. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Oregon_Dude Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 What's really sad is that people just give in to the nihilism, as if there's no other option other than what the mainstream steers them to do. Are these people even thinking about where this behavior is leading them? Right off a cliff. It took me a year and a half of pretty focused searching to find a good man who wanted a real, lasting connection and not just a fast food flesh fix. They are still out there - diamonds in the rough.I also think that people who have been "burned" or hurt badly in relationships (read: everyone, ever) are tired of looking for/being in relationships, and just want to get off. I'm glad you found your man, though. I'd like to think I'll be "found" one day by someone who actually knows who she is, and knows a good guy when she meets one. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Leigh 87 Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 I live near Sydney Australia. I have cute guys online actually wanting to commit. Men who are over hook ups and want to date! These men have been around had their fun and actually want a meaningful connection. They want to get Married. They want kids. They don't enjoy just getting the hottest pussy I have a guy atm who has been there and had the hottest hook ups and just....He craves real love. He wants to be cuddled at night. He isn't a robot and has had his fun..... As you can see from my pics I am attractive but by no means gorgeous or beautiful... Sadly I don't feel enough attraction or sparks and end it but these seemingly RARE tinder guys who treat me like a princess. Don't want sex early, treat me to romantic dates and etc. They are often very cut and upset too...when I end things.... They are sick of senseless sex and just want real love they think they finally find a connection and then these are cute fit guys with good jobs and the ones I dated were well endowed so lol non of them were lacking or desperate........ The current guy literally has girls offering him sex DAILY. I have read it. It is baffling. He has a daughter and find it disguisting and a bit unerving that these young girls are acting on this way... And I have seem pics of these girls that offer him daily sex. They are STUNNING young girls. I guess not all men want a girl that is that easy either. At least this guy doesn't give two hoots. Like Yay easy sex he laments. Something lasting and a partner to feel passionate about and come home to is his ideal....and I am sure many others. Maybe many girls are just don't generate sparks or attraction in many men that is SUFFICIENT enough for dating but enough for sex!? I am sure if I was overweight and/or plain I would still get 100s of messages too but because men will shag girls they don't find very attractive. Is it sad that I feel " lucky" that I can find men who want to date me as it give me real hope that at some men find me attractive enough to date and not just shag. Link to post Share on other sites
Leigh 87 Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 Just read a profile on Tinder that said "I'm looking for an honest and genuine man. I am hoping for a relationship but I am open to hook ups. I don't have a gag reflex and I love swallowing! :D" babahahaa, and I bet she's going to get so many relationship opportunities. Really!? LOL. Link to post Share on other sites
Leigh 87 Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 Some of guys start to wonder what's going on, why they're only getting girls who aren't up to par. So they start taking pics of different men and trolling. Then they take screen shots and post them and you can clearly see what's going on. They'll use a pic of a model and get the pretty ones, they'll use a guy who's hot but a step down from Hollywood and get merely cutes girls. Average get unattractive. Last year someone linked a thread on body builder that went on for 50 pages of screen shot after screen shot with girls giving their numbers and agreeing to fu*k. It was funny as sh*t. Also WB's right, the sites are notoriouse for chicks who just wanna chat and never meet in person. I'd say those make for about 50% of the gals on there. I am a merely cute or pretty girl and I don't only click on profiles of hot guys. I also feel drawn to average guys who have nice hair and blue eyes or something about them I am drawn to and have thing for. Many cute girls don't required a hollywood look alike in our online matches..... Some chicks are realistic... I have always been thrilled at my average guys who picked me and I have never just expected a tell dark and handsome type to actually pick me since I know I am sure no great beauty myself......... My recent ex dating partner was hot and tell and successful and very interested in me at the time and I struggled to believe he liked me..... Not all average to cute girls have inflated egos! Link to post Share on other sites
joseb Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 Anyone know how to use it without Facebook? Is is that you don't want to use your facebook a/c or you don't have one or want one? If the first, you can set up a fake profile to use just for Tinder. If the second, I don't know any other way... Link to post Share on other sites
SugarLips72 Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 Tinder is nothing but guys wanting hook ups and when you are a mutual match, guys never initiate contact. Very irritating app, I don't even do the online thing anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
phineas Posted August 12, 2015 Share Posted August 12, 2015 I'm on OKCupid and Tinder. I'm a very normal, intelligent, attractive and talented man. For a while I was taking it personally, getting very few responses. Then I realized: these women get so many messages. Even the unattractive ones. They have infinite choice. There is nothing personal about this; it's just a hugely over-saturated dating market, and the women have all the advantage/power. Best not to take dating too seriously. People have the illusion of always having "something better" around the corner. Problem is, you will never find the perfect person. the newer women to the site have a ton of options. The one's who have been on the site for years have been turned out by most of the men on there so that raises your chances. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted August 12, 2015 Share Posted August 12, 2015 Just read a profile on Tinder that said "I'm looking for an honest and genuine man. I am hoping for a relationship but I am open to hook ups. I don't have a gag reflex and I love swallowing! :D" babahahaa, and I bet she's going to get so many relationship opportunities. I'd be begging to hang out with this girl. Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted August 12, 2015 Share Posted August 12, 2015 Tinder is nothing but guys wanting hook ups and when you are a mutual match, guys never initiate contact. Very irritating app, I don't even do the online thing anymore. Not all of us Most of my matches turn out to be bots. Link to post Share on other sites
robmeister1190 Posted August 12, 2015 Share Posted August 12, 2015 Good article that's depressing because of its accuracy. I have a guy co-worker who's exactly like the guys talked about in this article. He asks on a frequent basis if he can set up a Tinder account for me because I'm not "scoring" with girls on a daily or weekly basis like he is. I roll my eyes and decline every time he offers. The whole hookup and Tinder craze has gotten ridiculous. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
loveweary11 Posted August 12, 2015 Share Posted August 12, 2015 Is is that you don't want to use your facebook a/c or you don't have one or want one? If the first, you can set up a fake profile to use just for Tinder. If the second, I don't know any other way... Yeah, have no Facebook and don't want one. Setting up a Tinder with a face Facebook doesn't work either. They check for that. Link to post Share on other sites
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