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not entirely happy


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These last few weeks have been odd for me. Havent had these feelings of helplessness in a long time. First there were my women issues that i had posted about last week which have subsided due to realizations i made, so thats good. My weekend was good and i had fun with friends but this morning that helpless feeling returned. I realized i wasnt 100% happy with my life, and i believe that is due to my job. I am a machinist, its a good gig that pays well but the shifts are long, 12 hours, and i work nights and i think that is starting to get to me. I dont want to do this anymore and need out. To add to that i have court this month for an ongoing dwi case that i had gotten a year ago. Still not happy with myself for this and although i am responsible in the sense that i dont drive intoxicated anymore, i feel that i need to quit drinking, even if its just for a month. I know this isnt much and that im lucky to have a job, but i cant help this feeling of being trapped. Sorry, just venting again.

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First of all, there is nothing wrong with "just venting". Second, it's good to have goals to reach for and setting aside the sauce for a few weeks is a good one. Third, it is also good that you acknowledge your "luck" in having a job, especially one that pays well. Fourth, is anyone 100% happy with life? Other than buddhist monks?

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