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Suspicious of friends intentions


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Finally a good response! I took the sleeping in the same bed despite lack of space in the house a something firm. I wasn't happy with her lack of considering that he liked her and we argued, but then she told him to back off against my wishes, really, so all is good so far.
As long as she keeps this other man as a friend, all is not good.

 

Google "how to steal a woman from her man" and you will see that there are many sites that tell men how to do this. The standard advice always given is to first be their friend, and then use that friendship to let her vent about her man. These sites tell you that no one is perfect, so no matter who her man is, there will always be issues that they can exploit.

 

On one such site is titled “Taking Another Man's Woman: Part II”. Typical of these sites, it says such things as “She has to perceive your intentions as being strictly innocent and friendly. Getting her to accept you as a friend is very important because later in the strategy, she will have to trust your opinion about her relationship. If she views your intentions as wanting to seduce her, she will not value your opinion.” Also typically of these sites, one site said "Cause/encourage the breakup. If you followed earlier steps, she should talk to you about the mistakes her boyfriend makes. If it's serious, let her know that what he does isn't right and she doesn't have to put up with it. Tell her you could never do that to her". Similarly, another site said "You want to make the girl you want to steal away feel like she can do a lot better than the guy she is currently with. How do you do this? It is quite easy. You want to wait for the perfect opportunity to get your jabs in. Sooner or later she will mention something negative about her boyfriend and when she does you need to agree with her and say something that suggests you would not do what her boyfriend did if you had a girlfriend.”

 

Intentionally or unintentionally, your girlfriend is letting this other man (OM) get his foot in the door. She is giving herself the chance to get to know him better. As one site advised (and this is common advice) “She isn't going to leave her boyfriend for someone she doesn't know, or hasn't known for long. Most of the time, you'll be chasing her for a long while.” In other words, by befriending a guy that is romantically interested in her, she is in effect still shopping and still on the market. You need to set up boundaries on opposite sex friends (OSF) that require that neither of you can have an OSF that is not a friend of your relationship as a couple. This other guy needs to go.

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If she was sick, then she should have called you and you could have gone to get her rather then sleep in the same bed with some dude.

 

Look. It's admirable that you respect her and you should be able to get the same respect back. She crossed the lines on you a couple of times now and maybe you should let her know in a way that she here's you and understands that it's no acceptable. Sometimes being too nice gets you pushed aside so it comes down to respect. You don't want nothing more but won't settle for less.

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Finally a good response! I took the sleeping in the same bed despite lack of space in the house a something firm. I wasn't happy with her lack of considering that he liked her and we argued, but then she told him to back off against my wishes, really, so all is good so far.

 

Well, i think you read what you wanted to read. I think you are scared of facing them. Playing cool will get you nowhere, because they won't stop.

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