tiger89 Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 So I would like to get some advice on a few things I guess. In early June my husband came to me and told that he wanted a divorce (after 2 yrs) and that the last couple months had just not been that good and he couldn't do it anymore. In June and July I begged, pleaded and tried everything in my power to convince him that we could work on our relationship, which made everything worse. We ended up only having contact when we needed to talk about bills for the months of June and July. He said and did a lot of hateful things to me including sleeping with other people and lieing. I left in July to visit family to get away and clear my mind and came back in August, and everything kind of changed we started talking on the phone and texting more but still did not see each other. About 2 weeks ago we finally seen each other at my sisters birthday party (he still considers my family his family) but he brought a girl with him, we had discussed it and I said as long as nobody makes it akward I am fine well that whole night he pretty much ignored her. We talked the next day and he said that he would like to become friends again (we were best friends before we started dating). So we hung out and watched movies and cooked for each other this last weekend and one minute he seems fine then the next he seems very weird to have me around. I still love him very much and would love nothing more to try to make our marriage work, I know that it'll take time, but I am not 100% sure he wants the same. He tells me that he wants to go ride horses with me again and that I am looking really good I just don't know anymore. And would really like some advice. Link to post Share on other sites
Solcita2 Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 Why do you wanna keep your marriage after all he did? He proved you he doesn't love you anymore... Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 I still love him very much and would love nothing more to try to make our marriage work, I know that it'll take time, but I am not 100% sure he wants the same. You're not sure what he wants? Really? He said and did a lot of hateful things to me including sleeping with other people and lieing. About 2 weeks ago we finally seen each other at my sisters birthday party (he still considers my family his family) but he brought a girl with him, one minute he seems fine then the next he seems very weird to have me around. Tiger89, let me ask you this - how would he show you he didn't care about you or your marriage ??? Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 You shouldn't have to beg any man to love you, much less be decent to you. He's not being loving or decent. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TigerCub Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 Tiger, I've never been in your shoes, so I don't know what it is like, but 2Sunny is right, you should never have to beg or convince someone to love you. I think that right now, the shock is still there and since you love him you still want to hold on to what you have, but pretend for a moment that he actually tells you he wants the marriage and wants you again, can you really imagine what your life with him will be life after that point? Would you be able to trust him not to cheat on you? Would you be able to get over the fear and insecurity that he could want out of the marriage again? Would you really feel lucky and happy to be with someone like him? Would you really ever truly get past the pain of what he's done to you? I'm just saying be careful what you wish for, because even if he decides to still stay married to you - that doesn't mean that things will be back to what they used to be before you found all this out. I'm sorry for your pain. You can do better than him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tiger89 Posted October 9, 2013 Author Share Posted October 9, 2013 Hey everyone, Thank you for your comments all of you are probably right on the fact that I just need to drop him out of my life. I really just don't understand why he would want me around anymore. But I suppose it is time to just pick myself up and stop waiting around for him and do things that I need to do to make my life happier. Tiger89 Link to post Share on other sites
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