B Posted January 12, 2001 Share Posted January 12, 2001 It wasn't fight that caused my girlfriend to stop having sex with me. I wish I knew exactly what it was. She says she is attracted to me and loves me, but when I try to bring up the subject of sex, she gets defensive. I try to do romantic things for her, I have always tried to be "the perfect boyfriend". I have never raised my voice to her, and I treat her like a queen. Maybe I'm too nice? I don't know. All I do know is that I'm a good looking 25 year old guy, and if all I wanted from her was sex, I could go find it elsewhere. She says that there is more to a relationship than sex. The way I see it, we have the more part, now lets bring back the sex part. Any advice? Link to post Share on other sites
Ace Posted January 12, 2001 Share Posted January 12, 2001 Sex is not everything. If she wishes not to have sex, then let it at that. I am sure that she has her reasons. If you truly do love her, then you will go along with her wishes. If, by some chance, you HAVE to have sex and break it off with her, then you did not love her that much anyway. Adam Link to post Share on other sites
sges Posted January 12, 2001 Share Posted January 12, 2001 yes, sex isn't everything. but it is strange if it's all of the sudden. and you're not wrong or shallow for wanting it when it has been a part of your relationhsip until now. but most important is not actually the no sex itself, but that she won't talk about why. perahps she's dealing with some issue and just needs time, but something is going on and she should be able to talk to you about it. your overarching concern should be that. even if she won't talk, let her know that you're there when she decides she wants to. if she doesn't, it will end the relationship, cause she has to want to fix it eventually...a relationhisp w/o communication doesn't last long. Sex is not everything. If she wishes not to have sex, then let it at that. I am sure that she has her reasons. If you truly do love her, then you will go along with her wishes. If, by some chance, you HAVE to have sex and break it off with her, then you did not love her that much anyway. Adam Link to post Share on other sites
Rachel Posted January 12, 2001 Share Posted January 12, 2001 Try an experiment here. Tell her you have plans this weekend to hang out with the guys.(even if you don't). You be the first one to end your phone calls, keep your visits short. Be busy, busy, busy. In short, be a challenge. You are too easy to read my dear. She is becoming bored with the "nice" guy routine. I'm not saying be a jerk, but really what are YOU getting out of this. One day you will get tired and walk out. Instead, be kinder to yourself, and let her do some of the chasing. I bet the minute you start being too "busy" for her, it will catch her attention. Dont' call for a couple of days. Re think your strategy. Hugs Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted January 12, 2001 Share Posted January 12, 2001 If you don't learn to be more cool with ladies, especially in the initial stages, you won't get too far with too many. Nobody, male or female, wants to have somebody just drop in their lap. You have just played your cards right out in the open. People just aren't attracted to that. They like mystery. Listen to what Rachel has written. She's a lady and she knows what she's talking about. Link to post Share on other sites
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