tanbark813 Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Over Labor Day weekend of this year my girlfriend supposedly went up to a girlfriend's cabin. She called me crying the first night and wanted to come to my place because of a fight with her friend. I just found out it wasn't a girlfriend, it was a guy she was somewhat interested in. She wanted a weekend away from me to spend with him and lied to me about it. Now she won't take my calls. She lives two hours away and I need to see her to talk about this in person. I didn't want to talk about it over the phone but it al came out. This is the 3rd serious relationship in a row that has ended due to the girl cheating on me. If it didn't hurt so much, it might almost be funny. I'm growing increasingly tired of life. There must be something better than this. Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Awe Cr p! I'm so sorry... Geez, I wish I had something to say that would make you feel better right now.. just know I'm thinking about ya, and am really sorry this happened. Link to post Share on other sites
tiki Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Okay, wait. She cheated on YOU and SHE'S not taking the calls? WTF? Well, I think you all know what I say....assclownette. Has the story changed about the strip-club incident? That may be next, man. Brace yourself. Sorry you're going through this. Are you gonna kick her to the curb? Link to post Share on other sites
EC Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 I am so sorry. I wish I could give you words of consolation. But I was in an LDR and I cheated. Well like I said he kissed me and I pulled away but it's still cheating because I never told my bf. But either way You were my hope for my LDR. You were doing so well. I know how much you care for her. You were already suspicious with the whole stripper thing. Which now what story will you hear about that? Anyways so now she won't pick up your calls? She's scared. How did you find out and are you sure??? 100 %??? I agree you do need to discuss this face to face and get all the details before you can come to a conclusion about whats to happen. Im sorry. Link to post Share on other sites
savethedrama4allama Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 This is a good thing: This is the 3rd serious relationship in a row that has ended due to the girl cheating on me You are strong enough to end relationships when you get f'd over instead of sticking around for more. You're strong and you have respect for yourself. I know it sucks, but you know the routine, and you know you'll love again. Man, take it as a favor that she's not taking your calls. She's just a coward. Can you just cut it off now? I think you know all you need to know. Link to post Share on other sites
EC Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Wait was that the weekend she said she need to console her friend??? eek! Link to post Share on other sites
250r Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 I know how you feel, its happened to me twice too, both very serious relationships or at least on my part. Look at it this way, their loss not yours. Regret is a mofo and that will be theirs to deal with forever..... Link to post Share on other sites
ntovrhm Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Sorry to hear about that man. I hate when people lie like that in relationships. Not everyone does, but people with that level of immaturity seem to think they need to, rather than have to deal with the situation with their SO and confront the consequences. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tanbark813 Posted December 3, 2004 Author Share Posted December 3, 2004 Originally posted by tiki Okay, wait. She cheated on YOU and SHE'S not taking the calls? Yes. She even said, "I didn't do anything wrong!" That completely blew me away. I said, "You spent Labor Day in Tahoe with another man. How is that not wrong???" She was supposed to come down to see me today but says she's too stressed to drive now. I'm going to take the day off work and go up and try to talk to her but I'm guessing it will be a futile pursuit. Originally posted by tiki Has the story changed about the strip-club incident? It hasn't even come up but I don't really care anymore. I can only assume she lied to me about that as well. With the Tahoe thing, it doesn't really matter one way or another what happened with the stripper. Originally posted by EtErNaLlYCoNfUsEd How did you find out and are you sure??? 100 %??? I found an email reply from the guy to her talking about the cabin in Tahoe and saying that he's willing to accept her offer to "just be friends" now. So yes, 100% sure. Originally posted by savethedrama4yrmama You're strong and you have respect for yourself. I know it sucks, but you know the routine, and you know you'll love again. Thank you for the encouragement. And you're right, I've been through this before and I know the routine. The first time I got cheated on I thought it was the end of the world. Now, I know that emotional pain is similar to physical pain. It stings like hell at first, then dulls down to a throbbing pain, then scabs over and the area gets numb for a little while, then finally heals fully and goes back to normal. It will be okay in time, I just wish I could speed up the process but I know I can't. Originally posted by EtErNaLlYCoNfUsEd Wait was that the weekend she said she need to console her friend??? Yep. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tanbark813 Posted December 3, 2004 Author Share Posted December 3, 2004 Upon further review, I've decided not to go see her. She cheated. She lied. She should be the one driving to see me and crying on her knees outside my door. Fu(k going to try and find her to talk. Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Originally posted by tanbark813 Upon further review, I've decided not to go see her. She cheated. She lied. She should be the one driving to see me and crying on her knees outside my door. Fu(k going to try and find her to talk. Amen Brother. Link to post Share on other sites
savethedrama4allama Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Originally posted by tanbark813 Upon further review, I've decided not to go see her. She cheated. She lied. She should be the one driving to see me and crying on her knees outside my door. Fu(k going to try and find her to talk. Amen tanbark. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Originally posted by tanbark813 Upon further review, I've decided not to go see her. She cheated. She lied. She should be the one driving to see me and crying on her knees outside my door. Fu(k going to try and find her to talk. Ahh, now you are making sense! I think you need to retaliate in a major way here. I know it is wrong but you'll feel a shyt load better. DOes she have any female friends that flirted with you in the past that you could bang?? Link to post Share on other sites
EC Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Seriously I was just going to post and ask you why you were going to see her if shes the one that messed up and should be calling you non stop and you not picking up her phone calls. Like my friends and I say F*ck the bullsh*t!! Let her come crawling back to you. I can't believe it. You finally find a nice guy and they get screwed over 3 times!!and we wonder why they turn into "players". Link to post Share on other sites
EC Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 DOes she have any female friends that flirted with you in the past that you could bang?? LMAO your evil man! Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Originally posted by EtErNaLlYCoNfUsEd I can't believe it. You finally find a nice guy and they get screwed over 3 times!!and we wonder why they turn into "players". Yes E.T. I used to be a "nice guy" 10 or 12 yrs ago and got used, abused and trampled on. Now I'm not-so-nice and the women I date behave much better and have more respect. Now, I usually dump them whereas when I was much younger they used to dump me. Link to post Share on other sites
EC Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Yes E.T. I mean I know I'm a little kookie..but out of this world? lol Was that on purpose Male? Link to post Share on other sites
savethedrama4allama Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Man tanbark, I can't figure out why this crap happens. You're attractive, thoughful, intelligent. I'm sorry. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Originally posted by EtErNaLlYCoNfUsEd I mean I know I'm a little kookie..but out of this world? lol Was that on purpose Male? that was supposed to be "E.C." Link to post Share on other sites
Author tanbark813 Posted December 3, 2004 Author Share Posted December 3, 2004 Originally posted by alphamale DOes she have any female friends that flirted with you in the past that you could bang?? Dude, the sad thing is my (now ex) gf is the best of her circle of friends in terms of looks and moral fiber. I wouldn't want anything to do with her girlfriends. Originally posted by savethedrama4yrmama Man tanbark, I can't figure out why this crap happens. You're attractive, thoughful, intelligent. I'm sorry. Thank you. If it's this much of a pattern, I must be doing something seriously wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
tattoomytoe Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 my current bf cheated on me too.....That's when i started going positive, like i was saying in the other post. Since the whole relationship with my bf, at least in my eyes, is shot to hell, i just try to make my bf the best person i can. Why am i still with him? well he wanted to stay together, after i suggested seeing other people. but he said he wanted us to stay together. well i moved out of our house, back to my parents. That one thing has helped soo much! for the first time in his life he lives paycheck-to-paycheck...almost his parents help him out. He is starting to hit this massive change that You were speaking of, where we actually grow up and starting thinking and doing for ourselves. Anyways, so focus on how you have made this girl a better person...maybe she recycles now, or stops at stop signs... it does not have to be anything major..but any positive way you have affected her life, and Focus on the positive ways she has helped you grow as a person. She sounds like she is not at the same point in her life that you are in yours...maybe that was the problem...Often you may start out on the same ath with your partner, but through mutual growth people sometimes stray different ways. Stay on the high road, it gets lonely up here. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Originally posted by tanbark813 Dude, the sad thing is my (now ex) gf is the best of her circle of friends in terms of looks and moral fiber. I wouldn't want anything to do with her girlfriends. I didn't say you had to date them or anything, JUST BANG ONE OF 'EM. Link to post Share on other sites
EC Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 that was supposed to be "E.C." OK Oh Tanbark. So let me get this straight.... She went to Tahoe to spend time with him. Then he wanted to go further and she said I just want to be friends??? It's not that bad yet..but she still lied to you, spent the time with another guy and who knows.?? I'm sorry. I know what it's like to want to know what happened and her not pick up the phone. I can bet she's scared and/or calling everyone and trying to get the story straight with all her friends. To then call you with the excuses. So what are you going to do about her now? If you find out she had something with this guy? Link to post Share on other sites
reservoirdog1 Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Tanbark... that sucks rocks, man. No two ways about it. After the second girl cheated on you, I bet you felt like you were doomed to be the guy that would always get cheated on. Having ungrateful cow#3 do it must hurt like a SOB. I only say this to get it out there as a prelude to telling you that it's NOT TRUE. You got dealt several hands of s***ty cards. Which doesn't make it hurt any less, but it points to a failure on the part of them. Believe it or not, there are women out there who WON'T spread their legs for some random guy just because they're unhappy with their significant other. There are women out there who will actually try to work on the relationship as their first step. Your only failure might be in your choice of partners... but often that's tough to judge except with the benefit of hindsight. Link to post Share on other sites
tiki Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Okay, maybe I missed it, but did she sleep with him? Link to post Share on other sites
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