d.stevens Posted December 6, 2004 Share Posted December 6, 2004 Whats the proper etiquette to receive an envelope that's a thankyou gift? In the past she's attempted to give me money for things I've helped her with. (one accasion 6 months ago) I VERY reluctantly accepted the money as I told her I wasn't expecting anything in return. This time she handed me an envelope (not knowing whats inside and assuming it was $...I said no thankyou.) It turned out to be a thoughtfully written thankyou card and some gift certificates. Is it the right thing to do....to accept the envelope and look whats inside first right there???....I didn't have time to read it in front of her as she had people show up as I was leaving..... I read it in the car as I was leaving... It was very nice of her, I'll see her again in a couple of days. The first thing I'll do when I see her is to thank her for the beautiful card. Is it proper to open the envelope up ( I don't want to appear as if I'm looking for money ) ?? Link to post Share on other sites
tokyo Posted December 6, 2004 Share Posted December 6, 2004 Who is "her"?? Your girlfriend? She gives you money for things you do for her??? It´s your job to refuse the money. Let her invite you to some nice cooked dinner or for the movies, but that should be it. Next time simply ask what the envelope is for, say thank, open it in front of her and if it´s money refuse it and give it back to her. Link to post Share on other sites
magda Posted December 6, 2004 Share Posted December 6, 2004 No.. don't open it in front of her if there are others around. That's rude. Assume that it's a note. But you might let her know during your next 'favor' that you don't like to accept money for things you've done for her bc you do it only out of friendship and the two of you have the kind of friendship that doesn't need to be paid back in money. Maybe she pays you back in money because she feels guilty about not having spent the time for you, or because you never ask her for anything. Or you can spend the money on a lunch for the two of you. Link to post Share on other sites
SoleMate Posted December 6, 2004 Share Posted December 6, 2004 The answer to this depends TOTALLY on your relationship. If you are a teenage boy, and you are helping out an elderly neighbor with snow shovelling, leaf raking, etc., then cash gifts are probably fine, and you just say "Thank you". But if someone you saw as a personal friend is attempting to "pay" you for your acts of friendship, then...the best I can say is that she's clueless. Trying to be nice, perhaps, but unaware that no decent person sells their friendship for money. Friends help each other, motivated by caring and generosity. EXAMPLE: Your friends may help you move, and you will naturally buy them pizza and beer afterwards. That is just a courtesy, NOT a payoff. If you were to give them each $10-20 and tell them to buy themselves beer and pizza, it would be offensive. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts