Author SlidingDownRainbows Posted October 26, 2013 Author Share Posted October 26, 2013 I also forgot to mention... The pastor actually came up to me after the ceremony before the reception to check on how I was going. He had heard what happened and wanted to let me know he believed I was well within my rights to say no to that unreasonable request. That actually made me cry a little... to know he cared. An update on the dress itself? I got it altered at a dressmaker. She did a good job. I'll find an excuse to wear it somewhere, sometime. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
crederer Posted October 26, 2013 Share Posted October 26, 2013 Good for you for taking the high road. it the long term that is the best way to go (even though I'm sure it would have felt satisfying to do something drastic). 1 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted October 26, 2013 Share Posted October 26, 2013 I also forgot to mention... The pastor actually came up to me after the ceremony before the reception to check on how I was going. He had heard what happened and wanted to let me know he believed I was well within my rights to say no to that unreasonable request. That actually made me cry a little... to know he cared. An update on the dress itself? I got it altered at a dressmaker. She did a good job. I'll find an excuse to wear it somewhere, sometime. i am so glad you had a good time, graceful girl you go.......glad the pastor showed compassion for you too.....smilin....enjoy disney world, ride on one of the teacups for me...:bunny:...deb 2 Link to post Share on other sites
dreamingoftigers Posted October 26, 2013 Share Posted October 26, 2013 I just thought of another cute, immature way you could've played it. Bow out from being a bridesmaid. -get the dress altered to fit you properly -wear it to the wedding -with the fat suit overtop of it -let them know that you decided you wanted to be a bridesmaid after all and that you're all set to wear the fat suit with the dress, just like they wanted. -apologize for it not allowing the bolero to fit properly. -let the other guests wonder LOL Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted October 26, 2013 Share Posted October 26, 2013 I thought I was almost over it but now I'm struggling with feelings of betrayal- from the bride and one of the other bridesmaids, who is also supposed to be a best friend. The bride defended me against her mother during the argument but did ultimately cave in again to her. The other bridesmaid stood up for the mother instead of me. It's not easy. I keep cycling between feeling I will be fine to go on the wedding day and then suddenly feeling angry that I spent all that time and energy and money on being her bridesmaid but I get told I can't be anymore just a few days before the wedding. I just deleted all the pictures on my phone of anything that reminded me of the wedding planning stages (rehearsal etc)... Yeah I guess I need more time. Geez, i missed that part. Pretty crappy and mean to do to someone but obviously it was her mom calling the shots, not her. Yes, once she's back from her honeymoon, talk this out because this IS the sort of thing that ruins friendships forever. Glad you had fun though! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SpiralOut Posted October 26, 2013 Share Posted October 26, 2013 I think that you wearing a fatsuit would have backfired on that mother. It would have been humiliating for her to have all the guests whispering about it and looking at her. A fat suit isn't exactly something that would go unnoticed and it WOULD have been gossiped about. For someone who cares so much about appearances, she doesn't seem to think much about the way that SHE looks. Anyway, sounds like you did the right thing. You got to keep your dignity and have a good time, which matters way more than pleasing some crazy mother of the bride. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author SlidingDownRainbows Posted October 27, 2013 Author Share Posted October 27, 2013 I think that you wearing a fatsuit would have backfired on that mother. It would have been humiliating for her to have all the guests whispering about it and looking at her. A fat suit isn't exactly something that would go unnoticed and it WOULD have been gossiped about. For someone who cares so much about appearances, she doesn't seem to think much about the way that SHE looks. Anyway, sounds like you did the right thing. You got to keep your dignity and have a good time, which matters way more than pleasing some crazy mother of the bride. Hah yes I did realise this too (not sure if her mother did) that if I really did wear the padding to fill out a dress 2 sizes too big for me that it would have been really obvious. I did warn my friend that it would've shifted the focus from "look how beautiful the bride is" to "what's up with that bizarro bridesmaid?!" The procession would've been memorable for the wrong reasons. I did think some of the comments here about how to get revenge were funny but yeah I wouldn't ever seriously do anything like that. I'm glad the wedding went well overall, the bride and groom seemed happy and I've moved on. I won't forget what happened but there is no point holding grudges either and I have many other things to look forward to. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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