Letter Confession

[SarahJames]

Here is a letter to my ex-MM. Things I thought/felt/knew and never said, and never will. Feel free to post yours.

 

Dear ex-MM,

 

You're supposed to be in a committed relationship with someone you love. You've vowed until death do you part, yet you lack respect for the person you've vowed that to. You know that after that phone mishap your wife thinks the worst - that you're cheating again. But you don't even take it seriously. I really didn't think you're a bad guy. But that doesn't mean you're a good husband. You have no remorse for what you do. Your marriage is none of my business, but all I know is that I no longer want this. Maybe no one has ever told you this, but I will; you got married to someone you love, but when you love someone you don't treat them the way you treat your wife. You're lying to her. You're betraying her. You're taking her for a fool. You've cheated in the past. You got another chance to make it work. She gave you that chance. She but effort into rebuilding that trust - trust that you wouldn't cheat again. She allowed you back into her life, and she believed when you said you loved her and you'd never do it again. What are you doing now? Why do you cheat? For the sex? For a few orgasms? A few hours of fun? Those things are worth it? If they are, then you shouldn't be married. You should let the person, whom you claim you love, receive that love in return from someone who won't cheat and lie to her.

 

You made me feel so good. You gave me the highest high...followed by the lowest low. But the low is no longer worth it - it's no longer worth my feelings. I often wonder whether you're a cold sex addict who needs constant validation that he's wonderful in bed, or whether you're emotionally damaged and use sex as a form of emotional connection/affection. You're so messed up. I'm so messed up, even more so after meeting you. I don't know what I did to deserve to ever meet you. I had been cheated on, recovered, and walked into this trap. Poor choices, apparently. I can't stand you. I can't stand that you live in my head. You don't even know how much I dislike you. How much I think I love you. You have no idea. I know about the girls you talk to online. I know that you even sent at least one of them pictures of me. How dare you. You describe to these women (who are probably men) the sex we've had. When we were laying in bed, and I had told you how you've changed my opinion of marriage - how I no longer wanted to get married - you went on to tell me how great marriage is. You told me how great it is to have someone to come home to, someone to talk to, share memories with, laugh with, and cuddle "like this" with... WHILE you were cuddling with me. While you held me, you told me how you hold your wife the same way. I don't know how I had the strength not to burst into tears when that happened. You were my mistake. These, these are the things you will never know, plus a whole laundry list of others. Here's the biggest thing: You don't ****ing deserve me OR your wife. Good riddance.

[RickFox]

Well said woman, well said

[hippetyhop]

Nicely written :)

[oliviah]

Wow, powerful statement as he always said, after dday that he made a mistake and fell in love with me. I always felt like I was a mistake.......if I can turn it around he was my mistake.

[happy stillmore]

I wrote a letter to xMM (didn't mail it). I was shocked to find it was 7 pages long typed! There are so many emotions, so many unanswered questions. I still have a strong urge to send him a letter but I know I can't. It would open more wounds if I did.

 

I liked your letter. I can relate to the low feelings not being worth the relationship. The sadness I felt when our day together ended and the inability to not do things together just became too much for me. I can not share the man I love. That is the simple truth. I just can't. I was a terrible OW in this regard.