Do I imagine the connection with her?

[LoveSick777]

Hi,

 

I am a bisexual and am in lovesick agony. Any advice would be appreciated! This is my story:

 

so i shared an intense experience with someone new. Even though we had just met it was almost like we were old friends. We could talk about many things, enjoyed each others company and even could enjoy companionable silences without feeling the need to fill every second with idle chatter. we are quite like minded and culturally the same. This was in the context of a larger group. We are both the women so of course I wanted to be very cautious. But there were times she would look at me and my heart would almost stop. I felt we really connected. We laughed, shared meals together or beside each other within the group. We shopped and had great fun. We even start to get a bit touchy feely with each other. Complimented each other etc. Ok ... so good right? In fact we took turns paying and light references to seeing each other in the future had been made. Many good signs.

 

However there were also conflicting signs .... she spoke of having formerly been with a guy and the "good bye" at the end was a bit awkward. I also feel like I got into that very nervous state where it was hard to anaylze and read the signs for the butterflies in the stomach. We had exchanged emails and of course I wrote within a few days.

 

However now it is over a week and there has been no response. I can't stop thinking of her and of the connection we shared. I have never had that happen to me before or felt so strongly about someone and I was married for over 6 years previously.

 

Do you think I have any reason to hope? I thought we had connected but it is hard for me to understand their apparent lack of wanting to get in touch .... I had to hold myself back from writing the minute I left. Is it worth spilling my feelings after somewhat more of a wait? Do I just need patience? She is older than myself but I seriously hope she is not automatically cutting such a rare occurrence due to that.

 

Thanks!

Lovesick

[jagon]

Hi,

 

I am a bisexual and am in lovesick agony. Any advice would be appreciated! This is my story:

 

so i shared an intense experience with someone new. Even though we had just met it was almost like we were old friends. We could talk about many things, enjoyed each others company and even could enjoy companionable silences without feeling the need to fill every second with idle chatter. we are quite like minded and culturally the same. This was in the context of a larger group. We are both the women so of course I wanted to be very cautious. But there were times she would look at me and my heart would almost stop. I felt we really connected. We laughed, shared meals together or beside each other within the group. We shopped and had great fun. We even start to get a bit touchy feely with each other. Complimented each other etc. Ok ... so good right? In fact we took turns paying and light references to seeing each other in the future had been made. Many good signs.

 

However there were also conflicting signs .... she spoke of having formerly been with a guy and the "good bye" at the end was a bit awkward. I also feel like I got into that very nervous state where it was hard to anaylze and read the signs for the butterflies in the stomach. We had exchanged emails and of course I wrote within a few days.

 

However now it is over a week and there has been no response. I can't stop thinking of her and of the connection we shared. I have never had that happen to me before or felt so strongly about someone and I was married for over 6 years previously.

 

Do you think I have any reason to hope? I thought we had connected but it is hard for me to understand their apparent lack of wanting to get in touch .... I had to hold myself back from writing the minute I left. Is it worth spilling my feelings after somewhat more of a wait? Do I just need patience? She is older than myself but I seriously hope she is not automatically cutting such a rare occurrence due to that.

 

Thanks!

Lovesick

 

 

OMG I have the same issue..

 

Does she know you like her in a romantic way??

[jagon]

Also.. yes you should have a little hope still, IMHO.

[LoveSick777]

Wow, nice to know I'm not alone. I have not told her. I have been so scared due to the conflicting signals. There are many signs she is likely also bi but it seems the second I try to move forward something then happens to kill my confidence. Like good things, we really enjoyed time together and I was the only one she ended up exchanging information with. On the other hand I keep feeling like I am a total fool in front of her. I did get an email which is good though. I don't know .... I guess I can ... play it by ear, see if I can try to work up to at least being together in person, or (tremble tremble) take the first step to broaching the subject and consequently my feelings. She has not admited outright she is into women but even if my experience to date is a bit more with men than women I swear we shared that look of recognition. I have platonic friends I hug and say "I miss you" to but it just feels completely different. I really would at least like to see if I can't work up to getting together (we live a couple hours apart). How is your situation? Any further thoughts?

[LoveSick777]

I don't want to scare her away because this isn't a case of someone I've known for even half a year. Even if it really feels like we were almost semi-dating and had know each other a long time we were so easy with each other. It seemed just natural one day, for example to be asked for my purse when I went to the toilets and I just handed it over. That is not something I would normally do with someone new. But now it almost seems like it is only getting harder to gauge her. I heard but it was not a great to meet you too type email nor did it offer really any opening to suggest getting together. So I am both happy the connection did not get cut but clueless as to what to do.

Edited October 22, 2013 by LoveSick777