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Is shyness/anxiety really a genetic issue?

Derpderpleton

By Derpderpleton
in Self-Improvement and Personal Well-Being

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Derpderpleton Member

Derpderpleton

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I guess the reason why I'm asking this is because I'm kind of a shy person and I feel I have a minor case of anxiety. I've read online that it is a genetic issue, which makes me think that it's impossible to overcome.

 

I'm one of those people who's shy at first, but after I get to know you a little bit then I'm anything but. I have some people tell me that I'm one of the funniest people that they know, and others always comment on how I'm "so quiet". I guess its just frustrating to go from being labeled as funny and outgoing, to shy and quiet..if that makes sense. I'm so jealous of people that can instantly connect with whoever they meet, whereas, with me, it takes time.

 

I can't get it out of my head that this a genetic thing, this is how I'm supposed to be. I don't want to be this way.

AShogunNamedMarcus Established Member

AShogunNamedMarcus

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Mine is genetic.

I have avoidant personality disorder (basically extreme shyness) that I got from my shy father. So if it's something you've always had, it's probably something you'll be working on for the rest of your life.

Harradin Established Member

Harradin

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I've been shy my whole life, but I wouldn't say its genetic! Just how we adapted to our surroundings etc!

 

I couldn't answer on the anxiety as I don't have any!

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AShogunNamedMarcus Established Member

AShogunNamedMarcus

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Also I passed it on to my daughter who is about to give birth. We'll see if her son gets it too.

FitChick Established Member

FitChick

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It's not something you can catch. It's something that is modelled for the children and/or they interpreted various events growing up as being The Truth when they are only beliefs that can be eliminated. Then the shyness goes away. Worked for me!

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SincereOnlineGuy Established Member

SincereOnlineGuy

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How do so many scientists feel they are evidence to assure that shyness is genetic, when in most cases, those who passed their genes also represented the examples of human behavior from which these same people drew their lessons and understandings after those genes were etched in stone?

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todreaminblue Established Member

todreaminblue

Posted
Posted (edited)
I guess the reason why I'm asking this is because I'm kind of a shy person and I feel I have a minor case of anxiety. I've read online that it is a genetic issue, which makes me think that it's impossible to overcome.

 

I'm one of those people who's shy at first, but after I get to know you a little bit then I'm anything but. I have some people tell me that I'm one of the funniest people that they know, and others always comment on how I'm "so quiet". I guess its just frustrating to go from being labeled as funny and outgoing, to shy and quiet..if that makes sense. I'm so jealous of people that can instantly connect with whoever they meet, whereas, with me, it takes time.

 

I can't get it out of my head that this a genetic thing, this is how I'm supposed to be. I don't want to be this way.

 

if you are anythign but shy once someone knows you it isnt shyness, its reserve..reserve is normally evident after trauma or situations that you have been put in or know of make you uncomfortable expressing how you feel until you know someone...not gospel but common..i am a reserve.....i reserve to show how i am until i know the perspons standing in front of me is receptive to me...

 

 

how i know that is reserve with me is....if someone needs my help and its in a public situation....i would scared as crap walk up into the middle of a confrontation and defend....thats reserve gone....shyness never there...covered a guy on the ground surrounded by agressive drunk men....cant say im shy..i am actually fragile once my reserve is broken........dont think you are shy either.....if you are no longer shy once someone knows you..

 

 

i also suffer from social anxiety......its all part of reserve..and the reception i receive...if someone is hurt i dont care anymore.i truly dont give a crap i find fortitude...and strength ...probably a gift from above...........doesnt matter how awkward i feel....socially ...ill stand up even if no one else does..got my head smashed into a toilet bopwl standing up for a friend..dont regret it.....are you shy how would you handle confrontation where someone needed your help..deb

Edited by todreaminblue
KathyM Established Member

KathyM

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It's usually a combination of genetics and environment that causes shyness. Sometimes it can be either/or, but usually there is both a genetic factor and environmental factor that come into play that contribute to shyness. Twins studies have shown that twins reared apart usually have a similar personality regardless of the fact that their environment was different, but environment can influence the degree of shyness that a person has. Children who grow up in a more isolated environment where there is limited opportunity to learn social skills will exhibit more social inhibition than others.

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todreaminblue Established Member

todreaminblue

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Shyness is not genetic, and anxiety is learned behavior.

 

You can overcome it naturally. The doctor is going to say it's genetic, and you won't be able to overcome it because he is in the business of medicine.

 

Do get discouraged, it gets better. You just have to work really hard at it.

 

accepting what you feel as natural helps.......and moving regardless...with fear .....knowing its just a moment in time you have to get through....deb

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KathyM Established Member

KathyM

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Shyness is not genetic, and anxiety is learned behavior.

 

You can overcome it naturally. The doctor is going to say it's genetic, and you won't be able to overcome it because he is in the business of medicine.

 

Do get discouraged, it gets better. You just have to work really hard at it.

Actually, twins studies show that shyness is genetic, although environmental factors can contribute to it as well. Therapy can help to relieve some of the anxiety associated with social situations. Exposure to more social situations also helps to relieve anxiety. Working on social skills also helps to relieve anxiety with social situations.

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theothersully Established Member

theothersully

Posted
Posted
I guess the reason why I'm asking this is because I'm kind of a shy person and I feel I have a minor case of anxiety. I've read online that it is a genetic issue, which makes me think that it's impossible to overcome.

 

I'm one of those people who's shy at first, but after I get to know you a little bit then I'm anything but. I have some people tell me that I'm one of the funniest people that they know, and others always comment on how I'm "so quiet". I guess its just frustrating to go from being labeled as funny and outgoing, to shy and quiet..if that makes sense. I'm so jealous of people that can instantly connect with whoever they meet, whereas, with me, it takes time.

 

I can't get it out of my head that this a genetic thing, this is how I'm supposed to be. I don't want to be this way.

 

I used to be very shy and awkward. After learning a lot about physics and computers, I decided, while still in college, to begin learning about the most difficult topic of all. People. Female people mostly.

 

I had girlfriends, but skated by and got lucky getting them. I wasn't any good with people.

 

I can tell you how to cure shyness as quickly as possible. Genetic or not, this will take care of it.

 

Face your fear. Sign up for public speaking classes/events/debates, get your ass up on stage and talk on front of a lot of people. You will be paralyzed with fear at first, stumbling through your prepared remarks, but as the days pass, you will start feeling more comfortable. Immediately, talking to 1 or 2 people becomes nothing at all after you've talked to 100 in a shot.

 

This is the absolute best way to overcome shyness.

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Derpderpleton Member

Derpderpleton

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I guess just growing up and always being told how quiet I am, I started to believe it.

 

I'm always compared to my younger brother, who's always been outgoing when it comes to social situations. Everyone always comments how we are so different because he's so outgoing and I'm quiet. People that really know me always laugh when they hear this though, because they know how I really am.

 

One thing I've noticed lately is that if I'm outgoing towards people I first meet, I tend to be more comfortable with them more quickly than if I'm shy and reserved. If I'm shy around them at first, I feel they're gonna have this permanent label of me being shy no matter what I do. The whole first impression theory is real, for me anyways.

 

I just wanna be able to be the outgoing non-shy version of myself around everyone, but I feel that I can't let that side show to some people. I don't know if it's because I'm not comfortable around them, or if it's because I feel they have already permanently attached the 'shy label' on me, or what. It's so frustrating.

whichwayisup Established Member

whichwayisup

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I've read online that it is a genetic issue, which makes me think that it's impossible to overcome.

 

I stopped reading after seeing this.

 

PLEASE do not believe that! I promise you, if you do CBT - Cognitive behaviour therapy, it'll improve your anxiety and shyness.

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theothersully Established Member

theothersully

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No. You don't need cognitive behavior therapy.

 

OP, here is what you do: go out everyday for the next month with a goal to be outgoing and talkative.

 

In this, you must:

 

1) Talk to 10 strangers per day for no reason.

2) Voice any opinion that comes to your mind (unless you're at work...that could go badly lol).

 

Literally, just start doing what you want all the time (when it comes to social situations).

 

If you do this for 30 days straight and stick to it, I promise you won't be shy anymore.

 

 

And get up and speak to groups.

SincereOnlineGuy Established Member

SincereOnlineGuy

Posted
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Actually, twins studies show that shyness is genetic, although environmental factors can contribute to it as well. Therapy can help to relieve some of the anxiety associated with social situations. Exposure to more social situations also helps to relieve anxiety. Working on social skills also helps to relieve anxiety with social situations.

 

 

Unless one of each set was raised in, say, the luxury of the western world, and the other in each set was raised, say, by other people in a 3rd world country and on a far-away continent, then your mere mention of "twins studies" means exactly nothing toward proving that shyness is genetic.

 

Surely you can understand that most often the same people who supplied your genes also created the environment in which you evolved post-birth.

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whichwayisup Established Member

whichwayisup

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No. You don't need cognitive behavior therapy.

 

OP, here is what you do: go out everyday for the next month with a goal to be outgoing and talkative.

 

In this, you must:

 

1) Talk to 10 strangers per day for no reason.

2) Voice any opinion that comes to your mind (unless you're at work...that could go badly lol).

 

Literally, just start doing what you want all the time (when it comes to social situations).

 

If you do this for 30 days straight and stick to it, I promise you won't be shy anymore.

 

Yes that will help with the shyness but not the anxiety. The anxiety at times can be so overwhelming that it's easy on paper to do as you listed but actually doing it, exposure therapy IS hard if one is not mentally prepared or ready.

AShogunNamedMarcus Established Member

AShogunNamedMarcus

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people who say genetics aren't involved have no freaking clue what they are talking about.

 

You're not going to be able to jump up off the couch and be a social butterfly. It is something you really need to work on and improve. You may need CBT to deal with it.

 

It has nothing to do with how you are raised. Pervasive shyness doesn't just attack a child unless they are post traumatic. Recognizing your make up and how your brain works is the first step at getting better.

Edited by AShogunNamedMarcus
KathyM Established Member

KathyM

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Behavioral Genetics and Child Temperament

 

Here is a peer reviewed journal article demonstrating that twins studies show that both genetics and environment can play a part in a child's temperament, including their shyness and sociability.

 

I've read many more articles on the subject as well, which supports this, since I did a research paper on the subject.

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melell Established Member

melell

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From everything I have studied, witnessed, experienced, it can be genetically, and socially influenced.

 

People underestimate the play of genetics in this. My masters partly involved indigenous culture and the relationship with mental illness/addiction and genetic predisposition. It is widely acknowledged by scholars (especially anthropologists-biological, and cultural) that mental illness is passed down.

 

When you trace it back there are undeniable evolutionary underpinnings.

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AShogunNamedMarcus Established Member

AShogunNamedMarcus

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I think being bullied is traumatic for many people. Unusual features, speech impediments, mean parents, all can lead to complexes. These are examples of social factors that can lead to anxiety and shyness. However, I am inclined to believe that the people whose shyness interferes with their lives are genetically predisposed.

Outsider77 Established Member

Outsider77

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As a person who has experienced extreme anxiety in many forms for most of my life, I can say that it is genetic and environmental.

 

I have had anxiety from a very young age, before I had any problems at home. Many people in my family have it, too. OCD in particular runs in families and it runs in mine. The children in my family have shown signs as young as 4 years old.

 

CBT is really good for anxiety. It helped mine. I am now able to deal with my symptoms. Just because something is genetic doesn't mean you can't do anything about it. You learn to deal with it. Your brain may be wired that way, but you work around it. You can also change your brain. It's been proven that your brain continues to change throughout your life.

 

Anxiety can also be GOOD. Why do you think we have it? Without fear, you can get yourself in all kinds of trouble. People who aren't afraid of anything take unnecessary risks. If you have anxiety, you are thinking about potential problems. I am a perfectionist, I love things to be precise, and it helps me. My need for perfection makes me do things well, better than most people. You just need to eliminate unnecessary anxiety.

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SincereOnlineGuy Established Member

SincereOnlineGuy

Posted
Posted
Behavioral Genetics and Child Temperament

 

Here is a peer reviewed journal article demonstrating that twins studies show that both genetics and environment can play a part in a child's temperament, including their shyness and sociability.

 

I've read many more articles on the subject as well, which supports this, since I did a research paper on the subject.

 

 

Oh, now we're at "can" ????

 

 

You mean to suggest that, say, if a child is born with a genetic affliction, and is later told that he won't live to see his 11th birthday, that his temperament can be a little pessimistic?

 

Earlier you said that "shyness is genetic". Now which is it going to be?

gaius Established Member

gaius

Posted
Posted
It's not something you can catch. It's something that is modelled for the children and/or they interpreted various events growing up as being The Truth when they are only beliefs that can be eliminated. Then the shyness goes away. Worked for me!

You're still one of the shyest people here, by far. :p

 

The feelings that go along with shyness usually don't go away, but you can come up with a routine that lets you be somewhat social with other people when you need to be. That helps reduce the anxiety a little.

theothersully Established Member

theothersully

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Anxiety part.... Do you have actual anxiety/panic attacks?

 

If so, I know how to cure those too. I used to have them.

mea_M Established Member

mea_M

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I've never heard of shyness as being genetic. Somehow that makes no sense to me. I know many people much like yourself. They are shy until they get to know someone. I'm the same way. I've always looked at it as finding my comfort zone and establishing trust. Once that's in line the slight introvert tendencies I have, turn to extrovert. Absolutely normal IMO.

 

Mea :-)

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