unusual situation of abuse

[yellowgirl]

hi,

 

so im a 30 yr old woman from the usa and ive been abused for over 7 yrs sofar.

 

what happened was I almost died from an accident and I became disabled from it I broke many bones and severe back injury. so I had to spend the next 3 yrs trying to relearn to walk and keep my balance. and with horrible pain

 

I got diagnosed with fibromyalgia

 

 

during that time certain family members went after me to abuse me severely every single day never leaving me alone or have any peace and quiet.

 

I was supposed to be at home resting and recovering from my injury and instead I was dealing with demands of others and abuse.

 

I remember my father would chase me around the house yelling and demanding like an army soldier and insulting me and making threats.

 

I think he must have followed me around threatening me about 80 times a day. if I couldn't get down the steps because of my mobility trouble he would threaten me.

 

and he would make up lies against me to people he even got violent to me a few times and made my back injury worse.

 

I was helpless and police told me they didn't believe me.

 

but that's another long story. that was when I was 22 or 23

 

he terrorized me for years and anyone who tried to help me he terrorized them and got them away from me. he tried to isolate me.

 

he would punish anyone who got near me and wanted to help me at all

 

he is extremely controlling.

 

i live at home with my parents since my accident because i was supposed to be home resting and recovering

 

i had a severe life threatening injury and i became a cripple

 

 

finally when my mobility was recovering and i was able to begin to keep my balance i got sick from a horrible disease from my parents home.

 

i was diagnosed with an uncurable and debilitating aggressive drug resistant disease and an autoimmune disease from that.

 

so ive been battling severe toxic drug resistant bloodstream infections for the past 5 yrs. and have been very sick. i can imagine that ive been feeling more sick than many cancer patients because i have been septic. and weak, chills, diarea, vomiting, neurological damage, seizures, stroke

 

night sweats, weight gain, joint pain, swelling

 

 

so it has been impossible for me to work or go to school since to technically ive been sick or disabled every day since the injury

 

 

i was attempting to heal from one thing and suddenly i get sick with another thing

 

so i have not been able to deal with anything if im able to walk to the toilet by myself then i feel accomolished because im very disabled

 

 

my speech is impaired from the neurotoxins

 

 

i don't know how im here still because i almost died from the infections

 

 

 

im still looking for cures

 

but between the abuse and emotional trauma that my family put me through since age 22 and the severe illness that i could have died from that im debilitated from. im not able to get to my dreams or goals

 

im not able to do anything... im too weak to go out

 

 

i haven't been allowed to do a thing. every single day for almost 8 yrs ive either been terrorized and emotionally paralyzed from fear from abuse they are doing or ive been physically disabled with severe life threatening symptoms.

 

i haven't had a day where its like okay im me what are my goals today.

 

i cant even concentrate and ive had times of depression

 

not one day in the past 7 and a half yrs where i can say everything is okay today and im me and have no one to answer to and i can focus on me and do what my goal is today

 

 

i have horrible flashbacks of all the people that my father has hurt and of the friends i lost, and other things. i might have some kind of ptsd

 

 

i don't understand how my family can be so mean, how they could live with themselves with abusing me every day and keeping me sick.

 

my dreams are gone, no career nothing

 

im single never had a boyfriend because of the abuse and the illness and being disabled from both.

 

i feel like ive spent 7 yrs entertaining abusive relatives

 

im so depressed and worn down that i don't even care if i ever have a boyfriend or if im 50 and single with a cat.

 

i don't care about the career i wanted anymore

 

im really depressed

 

 

another thing is ive been too sick to even go to visit my grandparents and i know they cared about me, but my parents kept me sick. dso i have not been able to go out to visit.

 

and my grandfather died i couldn't go to see him in the years before he died or go to the funeral.

 

i was at home fighting to survive

 

because i wasn't sure if i would also die.

 

i couldn't go to my sisters wedding because i was kept at home sick

 

 

i haven't met my sisters husband or met my neice because ive been too sick to go out into a car

 

im too disabled to do much

 

 

i know i cant look out for myself, so it hasn't been easy

 

because im dying from a medical disease... i don't know if i will live

 

 

 

i don't have anyone whos there for me... and i was thinking last winter of what my funeral plans will be.

 

but i don't know who to give them to. because my family tells me they believe ive never been sick. and they ignore me and make fun of me

 

even tho my doctors and tests know ive been sick

 

i know that my fathers best friends daughter commited suicide a year ago because she was mistreated and upset and people were mean to her.

 

 

and my family is still mean and rude to eachother and me. its like they want me to become depressed

 

and ive had times where i didn't care anymore what happened. i had to fight that

 

i don't know what to do

 

im very sick and i feel helpless. and im dealing with an unnecessary and evil cruel situation

 

why do people need to abuse people who are going through things in their own life.

 

i cant help myself or take care of myself so ....what do you think you would do in my situation?

 

im still looking for a cure for my illness that might be terminal

 

im in horrible pain each day.

 

and my relatives are not supportive and they are rude and i have no friends

 

there is no one who cares about me or asks me if im okay

[spiderowl]

I'm really sorry to hear how you are. I don't know where you live or what kind of social care system you have there, but would you be better off if you were in contact with social services? Also, there must be helplines for people suffering from family abuse. Do you have access to a telephone? You can type, it seem, so could you contact one of these organisations by email?

 

I am sorry that authorities have not believed you. I think you need to go directly to one of the organisations that supports those being abused. It sounds like you have a very dysfunctional family.

 

What has your doctor and the hospital said about the abuse? Have you told them?

[beach]

How was it possible for Dad to "chase you around the house" with all those injuries?

[yellowgirl]

to the last person who posted don't post in my thread. this is my thread and I don't have patients for abusive people like you.

 

im not saying I ran but he would run after me to me and threaten me and be violent. I wasn't the one running.

 

if I was on the steps he would threaten to kick me down the steps.

 

I didn't find anyone who will help me. its hard for me to find social services because im dying from a serious medical problem.

 

and they haven't been able to help me because of my disabilities. but maybe they also didn't believe me.

 

I live in the usa

 

I have a very hard time getting anyone to believe me or help me. usually when ive asked for help I was victimized more by agencies and people who were supposed to help

 

im helpless and cant take care of myself. I cant cook or do laundry or shop. sometimes I cant walk to the toilet.

 

I don't know if ill be alive in a few months or in 2 or 5 yrs

 

I haven't been able to get to a doctor in over a year because ive been a shut in and cant go out of the house. im too weak.. so its not safe for me to go into a car to a doctor

 

I don't think theres many options for people like me. im a rare case. I wouldn't survive in a domestic violence shelter. im too weak to do anything

 

im not terminal enough to go to a hospice. theres no definidate stamp of life span. the last time I went to a doctor I wasn't as sick as I am now

 

I also have trouble communicating verbally due to my disease I have speech disorders which is part of the reason no one believes me.

 

im usually bed ridden because I go each day as if im drugged up on sleeping pills the entire day. all I can do is eat, sleep and sit down at the computer.

 

I have an autoimmune disease that is very serious so I can get very sick from even going near certain things or near certain people. I have no defense from bacteria. so

 

I don't know what the option is. most abuse victims are not as disabled as me, im sure there has to be even survivors in wheelchairs but I don't know what they do, but im worse off than a person in a wheelchair because of my disease. I can get septic shock and other things and a worse stroke and seizures

 

 

 

but I cant look out for myself so I cannot be independent.. AND I will probably never be able to get a job. because of the damage that was done. so I will need someone to take care of me as long as I live. I cant drive either due to my disabilities.

 

so im just a shut in and my abilities are the same as an elderly 85 yr old whos sedentary. I guess im a young looking 85 yr old.

even tho im 30 physically my abilities are of an elderly person.

[beach]

I'm curious why I'm shamed for asking a simple question for clarity?

 

Asking you a question is NOT abusive!!!

 

Maybe your idea of abuse is off kilter.

[yellowgirl]

my idea of abuse is being followed to other threads and being asked dumb questions no one should ask.

 

 

this is not about you so get out of my threads

 

your a bully and probably half of my age.

[almond]

What have you been diagnosed with?

 

If you really are this ill and have not seen a doctor in over a year, call an ambulance. Once you get to the emergency room, tell them of your abusive living situation, and request to see a social worker/psychologist.

 

There are services for people in these situations. Once you get to the hospital, they will be able to help.