NC for 65 days!! whats your experiences? Will they ever contact you?

[AnnaAnna]

It is my birthday coming up in a couple of weeks, hopefully i get a birthday message and if I don't I guess she really will never contact me again.

 

After we broke up I didn't send him a bday message. Our BU happened just few days before his bday.

So, don't wait for a message. Get out and have fun

[gmccormick]

The people that say ''No, she will never contact you, it's done" blah blah.. don't listen to them.

 

Obviously you're not sitting around waiting for a text which is great, live your life in the mean time.

 

My gf of 4 years split up with me in the same situation as you about 2 months ago. For the first two weeks I called her and she listened to everything I had to say, but I didn't beg for her to take me back, I accepted that she had made a decision.

 

Anyway, about 3 weeks ago she got in touch asking how I was and that she saw my friends at a club. She asked why I wasn't with them etc.. then said see you around sometime. We're at the same University, live a 2 min walk away from eachother, but I'm not getting my hopes up. I haven't actually seen her in 2 months - and to be honest, I'm not ready to see her yet.

 

But I do believe she will get in touch with you. Be patient

[reddragon588]

The people that say ''No, she will never contact you, it's done" blah blah.. don't listen to them.

 

Obviously you're not sitting around waiting for a text which is great, live your life in the mean time.

 

My gf of 4 years split up with me in the same situation as you about 2 months ago. For the first two weeks I called her and she listened to everything I had to say, but I didn't beg for her to take me back, I accepted that she had made a decision.

 

Anyway, about 3 weeks ago she got in touch asking how I was and that she saw my friends at a club. She asked why I wasn't with them etc.. then said see you around sometime. We're at the same University, live a 2 min walk away from eachother, but I'm not getting my hopes up. I haven't actually seen her in 2 months - and to be honest, I'm not ready to see her yet.

 

But I do believe she will get in touch with you. Be patient

 

If she gets in touch with you great (or not). But either way you can't sit around waiting for them to contact you. And if you're using NC as a way to get them to contact you you're doing it wrong.

[im_thedude]

My ex hasn't contacted me once, three months post break up. For the first few weeks I wondered how she was able to move on so quickly without contacting me once asking how I was doing.

 

Then I found out she was already dating some guy she met online that lives 400 miles away. She hasn't contacted me because she has moved on. Her thoughts are on this new guy, her new friends, this new life she is living - she changed everything immediately after the break up. Literally left behind one whole group of friends for a new one from her new job. Picked up a few new hobbies and that's that - it was a clean slate for her and I'm a faint memory.

[barky2]

The people that say ''No, she will never contact you, it's done" blah blah.. don't listen to them.

 

Obviously you're not sitting around waiting for a text which is great, live your life in the mean time.

 

My gf of 4 years split up with me in the same situation as you about 2 months ago. For the first two weeks I called her and she listened to everything I had to say, but I didn't beg for her to take me back, I accepted that she had made a decision.

 

Anyway, about 3 weeks ago she got in touch asking how I was and that she saw my friends at a club. She asked why I wasn't with them etc.. then said see you around sometime. We're at the same University, live a 2 min walk away from eachother, but I'm not getting my hopes up. I haven't actually seen her in 2 months - and to be honest, I'm not ready to see her yet.

 

But I do believe she will get in touch with you. Be patient

 

 

Great advice!!!!

 

NOT!!!!!!!!

 

Let's have op sit on his hand and be patient and let his life pass by because some stranger told him that she'll contact so just wait.

 

Are you kidding?

 

You want to waste your life away waiting for someone who you MAY never hear from again?

 

WTF sense does that make?

 

Move on dude.

 

Break freaking free of what was, and let WHAT WILL just happen.

 

New posters posting false hope to someone is what sets so many people back on this site.

 

The first day you sit back and come to terms with not being with that person, may never speak again to that person, IS WHEN YOU BEGIN TO HEAL.

 

Let go of hope op.

 

 

 

 

 

Barky

[aybc123]

My ex hasn't contacted me once, three months post break up. For the first few weeks I wondered how she was able to move on so quickly without contacting me once asking how I was doing.

 

Then I found out she was already dating some guy she met online that lives 400 miles away. She hasn't contacted me because she has moved on. Her thoughts are on this new guy, her new friends, this new life she is living - she changed everything immediately after the break up. Literally left behind one whole group of friends for a new one from her new job. Picked up a few new hobbies and that's that - it was a clean slate for her and I'm a faint memory.

 

Sounds kind of familiar, mine moved away for work for 4 months, immediately started dating a new guy in the new city, made a whole bunch of new friends, working lots of hours and training and out having fun the rest etc. Im not surprised that she hasnt contacted me, i dont think she has contacted anyone from here, it's like she put her old life in some kind of box. Im going to be interested to see what happens when she moves back in a month.

[generic person]

Thanks every one for the advice and sharing your stories,

 

I got far more responses then i thought, even though most of it was the opposite of what i wanted to hear haha

 

keep the thread going

[Sugarkane]

Is that so? So how come I've never begged, pleaded or contacted me ex ever, unlike majority of people on here and have never been contacted- ever?

The people that say ''No, she will never contact you, it's done" blah blah.. don't listen to them.

 

Obviously you're not sitting around waiting for a text which is great, live your life in the mean time.

 

My gf of 4 years split up with me in the same situation as you about 2 months ago. For the first two weeks I called her and she listened to everything I had to say, but I didn't beg for her to take me back, I accepted that she had made a decision.

 

Anyway, about 3 weeks ago she got in touch asking how I was and that she saw my friends at a club. She asked why I wasn't with them etc.. then said see you around sometime. We're at the same University, live a 2 min walk away from eachother, but I'm not getting my hopes up. I haven't actually seen her in 2 months - and to be honest, I'm not ready to see her yet.

 

But I do believe she will get in touch with you. Be patient

[aybc123]

Is that so? So how come I've never begged, pleaded or contacted me ex ever, unlike majority of people on here and have never been contacted- ever?

 

Maybe your ex figures you're just fine and would rather not hear from them?

 

Every relationship is different, as are the people in them, if you think about it you can probably usually figure out the way someone is going to act after a break up.

 

Would you have been friends with the ex if you'd never got together? i.e. do you get along with each other well on a friendship basis, were you best friends before you got together, were you best friends during the relationship or was it more passionate with constant fights, do you have common mutual friends, shared interests and hobbies? If not then it's natural to not be friends or be in contact after the relationship is over.

 

How long was a relationship/ how long have you know them? Anything under 6months or a year and again i wouldnt expect anyone to want to stay in contact simply because you dont know the person well enough, there's no point, it's a weaker bond etc.

 

What kind of person are you or they, do you both keep in contact with people from your past, old school and uni friends or do you or they tend to forget about/ not keep in contact with old friends.

 

How did it end, was it sudden with animosity hurt and harsh words so people may not feel able or welcome to reconnect or was it just someone pulling the plug on something that hadnt been the same for a while.

 

Do either of the people find themselves in another committed relationship again soon after the breakup?

 

There are so many factors to consider that it's safer not to assume anything.

[loveofhorses1970]

The way we broke it off, I doubt I'll ever hear from him again! And that's good, it was a toxic relationship.

[Talulah]

My ex has been in touch with me since our break-up, which was due to distance/different priorities. I still miss him but thanks to NC, I am feeling much better than I was feeling 4 months ago.

 

I still miss him like hell sometimes, but not as much as I used to.

 

Sometimes people break up with us and we don't care, other times we do. Most people who love someone else are very sensitive after the break-up and cannot handle harsh truths. I take it gradually, I now see him and us for what he/it was.

 

What really helped me through it was to think that whatever people do, it's motivated solely by themselves. You rarely have a play in it, it's what they feel.

 

I would think that she will contact you again, it just depends on how she doing.

 

Some people never leave this website and they are always willing to give you the "harsh reality" because they can take it. That never helps OP because they are not thinking the same way as other people are. So, you can bang it to them all you want, but OP is heartbroken and wants comfort.

 

I believe that if you full NC, I mean for a long time, years, most of them come back. If it was a good thing, they will remember. But in order for that to ever happen, you must not talk to them. It's not a game, it's just that you both need to be separated and grow on your own.

 

Keep improving yourself but don't lose faith:love:

[Fufu]

It is my birthday coming up in a couple of weeks, hopefully i get a birthday message and if I don't I guess she really will never contact me again.

 

So what if she messaged you? You will just feel worst and that eventually will become your worst birthday ever.

[generic person]

So what if she messaged you? You will just feel worst and that eventually will become your worst birthday ever.

 

I just want to know she is thinking about me and i actually ment something to her over the last 4 years,

 

I'm not hopeful that she will message me because i know she most likely won't but it would be nice to have a little bit of closure even though

[Fufu]

I just want to know she is thinking about me and i actually ment something to her over the last 4 years,

 

I'm not hopeful that she will message me because i know she most likely won't but it would be nice to have a little bit of closure even though

 

If it really make you feel better sending her the message, it's your choice. Just don't have too much of any expectations.