What makes the OW brag about being in a relationship with a MM?

[PhoenixRise]

Someone asked to know what it is she is writing. I don't have all of them but this is what she just wrote a few minutes ago:

 

"I want blonde highlights but my sexy says no cuz its white trashy to him."

 

I highlighted my hair a month ago and he expressed his displeasure with it to me saying that it looks trashy when the dark roots grow in.

 

Then she went on to post:

 

"He said I can only be white trash in the bedroom haha. I know that's right. Can't wait to be with him forever"

 

I told him that when I got married, my grandmother's words of wisdom to make my marriage work were to "be a lady in public and a whore in the bedroom"

 

This is the kind of stuff I'm talking about. This time she didn't use my name directly but it is obvious to me what she is talking about. She obviously wants me to know that he shared details of our relationship with her and she is now using it to hurt and humiliate me.

 

So what do you all think? How many want to bet that he is planning to be with her... or that she is just a crazy psycho because he dumped her and hurt her? Pick a side and lets see who is right. The truth will come out soon enough!

 

She sounds like she has all the intellect of a 12 year old. AND (if she is telling the truth about this exchange between them) it seems like their conversations are pretty shallow and superficial.

 

I don't know if he is planning to be with her or if she is just hurt and lashing out. Either way she looks/sounds like an idiot.

 

If you are going to look at what she is posting I hope you get to the point where you no longer feel embarrassed or humiliated by your husband's affair or the OW's actions.

 

Your husband embarrassed himself by blowing up his family over an airhead.

OW is embarrassing herself because she IS an airhead.

[ladydesigner]

Block the OW. All she is, is nonsense at this point. A woman that needs to keep humiliating a woman who has already been humiliated is a low human being in my eyes. She (the OW) is the epitome of white trash.

[ladydesigner]

OP is not being directly contacted but she is reading her Facebook?

 

 

Oh I didn't realize this. Well I also don't think it is a good idea for a BS to break their own NC with the OW as it usually brings more pain.

[Furious]

Someone asked to know what it is she is writing. I don't have all of them but this is what she just wrote a few minutes ago:

 

"I want blonde highlights but my sexy says no cuz its white trashy to him."

 

I highlighted my hair a month ago and he expressed his displeasure with it to me saying that it looks trashy when the dark roots grow in.

 

Then she went on to post:

 

"He said I can only be white trash in the bedroom haha. I know that's right. Can't wait to be with him forever"

 

I told him that when I got married, my grandmother's words of wisdom to make my marriage work were to "be a lady in public and a whore in the bedroom"

 

This is the kind of stuff I'm talking about. This time she didn't use my name directly but it is obvious to me what she is talking about. She obviously wants me to know that he shared details of our relationship with her and she is now using it to hurt and humiliate me.

 

So what do you all think? How many want to bet that he is planning to be with her... or that she is just a crazy psycho because he dumped her and hurt her? Pick a side and lets see who is right. The truth will come out soon enough!

 

 

The ow seems unbalanced and if it's any consolation you have proof of it. If this is the woman your soon to be ex husband risked it all for it's no surprise that you've shown him the door and intend to divorce him.

 

It's unlikely they will end up together as most affair partners do not move beyond the affair.

 

In the end it's not the affair partner but the WS who is responsible for their own actions and choices. The ow is only a reflection on your husband and illuminates his character.

 

Broken people attract other broken people.

[AlwaysGrowing]

I am so sorry that your husband chose such a class act for an AP.

 

 

How terribly embarrassing for your husband..to be associated with that.

 

Listen, if someone has to tear someone else down, to make themselves feel better...it only HIGHLIGHTS how low they are. She knows you are above her and its making her crazy.

 

Go live your life. Drop these nutjobs.

[sweet_pea]

OP is not being directly contacted but she is reading her Facebook?

 

I don't think OP was ever reading xOW's facebook. It seemed like xOW would tag OP's xhusband in things, and when you are friends with people, depending on their account settings, you can see what they are tagged in as was the case with OP and her xhusband being friends, thus she could see what xOW would tag them in, etc.

[Raena]

Yes, you all are right about the facebook... it was tagging that she did but that part is done. She is blocked on there and I don't bother to look at that.

 

The stuff I posted is from twitter and I need to stop looking. It is as simple as that yet I feel like I can't until I know what is really going on here.

 

Just another quick update on this situation:

This past sunday she had posted a picture of a ring on twitter saying he gave it to her and then said they are planning to be together in 11-12 days.

 

Well... 11-12 days from that date is the 15th of this month.

 

He just texted me a little bit ago that he found an apartment and is moving out on the 15th.

 

Seems like the mystery of why she has been so vindictive is becoming clearer and clearer.

[Spark1111]

wait.....she maybe won the man AND still has to ANTAGONIZE you?

 

sad, sad, sad.....

 

She is his default choice, his Plan B back-up plan when you were no longer interested and moved to divorce.

 

But she has to brag, announce and spin it as if she won over you.

 

I give it two years....if that. Unless they both convince themselves that it was meant to be....

 

time to move on. She may be trying to goad you or rub your nose in her victory.

 

tweet back: Cheating H moving out Thank God! raenahere@happy

[Raena]

Haha spark! Your posts always crack me up.

 

I will wait to get my revenge until afterwards. He will have to come see his son without her... it wouldn't take much for me to post something like "oh man, now I know why they say break up sex is so great!" right after he leaves.... just because I know she will be looking and will have to wonder if he isn't cheating on her with me. But I get ahead of myself... lol. Actually, more than likely I will be over and done with all this stuff by then and not feel the need to interfere... he will do that all on his own eventually.

[Steadfast]

I will wait to get my revenge until afterwards. He will have to come see his son without her...

 

Really? She can't come along when he's picking up his son? Because you said? You have no more power to stop this then her posting habits.

 

You're in for harsh reality and setting yourself up by plotting revenge. She, and he will continue to push your buttons as long as you keep showing them.

 

Get smarter.

[Raena]

Really? She can't come along when he's picking up his son? Because you said? You have no more power to stop this then her posting habits.

 

You're in for harsh reality and setting yourself up by plotting revenge. She, and he will continue to push your buttons as long as you keep showing them.

 

Get smarter.

 

Actually... yes I do have every right to ask that she not be with him when he is with his son at my house. He has already promised his son that he will come here to spend time with him. So yeah, I do foresee times in the future that he will be at my house without her.

 

As for plotting revenge... it makes me feel better at the moment and keeps me from actually responding to the stuff she writes. What's the harm in it? I already said that I probably wouldn't bother when that time comes anyway.

[PhoenixRise]

Really? She can't come along when he's picking up his son? Because you said? You have no more power to stop this then her posting habits.

 

You're in for harsh reality and setting yourself up by plotting revenge. She, and he will continue to push your buttons as long as you keep showing them.

 

Get smarter.

 

I'm pretty sure she CAN INDEED decide who is welcome in her home or on her property. No judge is going to tell her she must entertain her husband's/ ex husband's girlfriend.

[ComingInHot]

Raena, Ohhh the daydreams I had, for a long while:o, after I found out of the A**

 

Hair removal cream in H's shampoo...

Renting Billboards w/her picture and a special caption...

I could go on and on and on and, well you get the picture.

 

Enjoy your vengeful, ugly thoughts. For a while... then, get your Greatest "revenge" by living BETTER!!

 

Whatever the judge says will be. If that means NO OW w/in a mile of your son until they're properly M'd or for a year or two or more, then so be it. (I'd Definitely AK for that though)

 

God speed you through the D and to a better life!!!

[Raena]

Raena, Ohhh the daydreams I had, for a long while:o, after I found out of the A**

 

Hair removal cream in H's shampoo...

Renting Billboards w/her picture and a special caption...

I could go on and on and on and, well you get the picture.

 

Enjoy your vengeful, ugly thoughts. For a while... then, get your Greatest "revenge" by living BETTER!!

 

Whatever the judge says will be. If that means NO OW w/in a mile of your son until they're properly M'd or for a year or two or more, then so be it. (I'd Definitely AK for that though)

 

God speed you through the D and to a better life!!!

 

I hear ya on the thoughts. At this point whatever makes me feels better is fine by me.

 

One question... what do you mean by the comment about them being properly married for a year or two or more? Never heard of that one before. From what I understand, judges don't really give a hoot about who either one of us is living with, they want the parents to have access to the child. That means I can't insist that she not be around my son at his house or during his time with him although I really wish I could given the circumstances. But if they are married, I have no say whatsoever in it... she has to be allowed to be around him (unless there is a RO that is)

 

I do have some thoughts on all of that, but I'm not sure what all I could do about it. I have to be honest... the idea of him being with someone who is nice and kind to my son isn't nearly as upsetting to me as the idea of him being with this particular psycho. I sincerely hope he isn't really planning on being with her. It isn't healthy for our son to see that happen so fast and I'm worried about how she would treat him given the surly way she has treated me.

[Spark1111]

Does she have children?

 

because when they move in together they will all be one happy family in this new apartment, yes?

 

Talk to your attorney to see if any parameters can be set in place regarding introducing your young child to respective romantic partners and if so, BOTH of you will have to abide by it.

[ComingInHot]

Raena wrote, "One question... what do you mean by the comment about them being properly married for a year or two or more? Never heard of that one before. From what I understand, judges don't really give a hoot about who either one of us is living with, they want the parents to have access to the child. That means I can't insist that she not be around my son at his house or during his time with him although I really wish I could given the circumstances. But if they are married, I have no say whatsoever in it... she has to be allowed to be around him"

 

I believe you can request ANYTHING you want in a divorce. Alimony, child support, a pink unicorn, a clause stating that due to the divorce happening because of infidelity and OW's _________ (insert her name here) along with all of the evidence of her being hostile towards you and trying to hurt you through social media etc... the judge then decides yea or ney to the requests ie; judge rules in favor of child support, pink unicorn and you get the house but rules against alimony and ow being in the presence of your child (just an example there*).

 

I DO believe that IF they get M'd and have a legally binding agreement of marriage, it does give her access to your son , but I HAVE seen where a G/F was NOT allowed around children for X amount of time or until becoming a spouse, and that didn't have anything to do with an A situation (I don't think).

 

But again, you can request ANYTHING from the courts in a divorce. If there IS evidence that she is hostile and could take it out on your son or manipulate your son, the judge MAY grant "NO access" for an amount of time*

CIH

[peaksandvalleys]

The ow seems unbalanced and if it's any consolation you have proof of it. If this is the woman your soon to be ex husband risked it all for it's no surprise that you've shown him the door and intend to divorce him.

 

It's unlikely they will end up together as most affair partners do not move beyond the affair.

 

In the end it's not the affair partner but the WS who is responsible for their own actions and choices. The ow is only a reflection on your husband and illuminates his character.

 

Broken people attract other broken people.

 

 

^^^^I believe this is true.

[Raena]

Coming in hot wrote: I believe you can request ANYTHING you want in a divorce.

 

The only problem with that here is he and I are not married.

 

Just wanted to clear that up. We were together for 11 years, lived together for most of that time but we never got married. I was going to say something about this earlier in this thread but then decided it didn't really matter. Married or not, we were together and a family.

 

Sad part is, we were talking about it this past summer. Things were going pretty good between us and we talked about making that happen. He said he just wanted to save up a little money to buy me a ring. Little did I know that the reality was... he was either still involved with or was at least still talking to this other girl all while telling me that he thought it was time for us to take that step.

[AlwaysGrowing]

Let me the first to CONGRATULATE you on NOT GETTING MARRIED!!!!!!!!

[Raena]

I thought I'd resurrect this ages old thread to explain what I've figured out since this post.

 

Apparently she was posting all of that stuff on purpose to hurt me because she believed they were going to be together. Everything he said to me was a lie. He lied to me over and over again, every step of the way, about what was happening.

 

They are currently in a LDR because he is out of town for work and has been for almost 2 months off and on since he and I split up and he moved out. This seems to be drawing the two of them closer together as they whine and cry about how much they miss each other.

 

My ex apparently decided that since I kicked him out, that she's "the one" and he's going to live with her... and get married soon too if I can believe what that skanky hobo is posting.

 

I'm actually glad that I looked at what she was writing. I stopped doing it for a little while when I thought it was too much for me to handle. I've since moved past that and it doesn't bother me anymore. I do still keep an eye on what's going on because they have split up and gotten back together a couple of times in the past couple of months. Just because I want to know what my son is going to be walking into.

 

We are at a stand still right now. He says that when he comes back to town (to his own place) that he wants our son to come stay with him on the weekends. He hasn't been specific about when. We've gotten into a few arguments because he is planning on living with his hobo when he returns and I don't want her to be introduced to our son yet.

 

Anyhow... all of that is pointless. The point is... in this case the OW was bragging about her relationship with my ex because she wanted the world to know how much they loved each other. I guess keeping it a secret for that long took a toll on her and so now she's going overboard with making sure to post about EVERY thing they do and say to each other. She's pretending that the year and a half they spent sneaking around was actually a normal relationship and is still bragging about it online.

 

I find that to be a tad bit annoying. It doesn't bother me that much, but I do think once in a while that I'd really like to blast her out of little fantasy land and remind her that it WASN'T normal and make sure that everyone she is pretending otherwise to knows the truth. For all intents and purposes... it still doesn't look normal to me.

 

So yeah... this OW had her reason... she hated me because I was with her "soulmate" whom she believed she should have regardless of what it would do to me or to my son and she wanted the world to know how much better than me she is.

 

Some of that has abated, but she does still rant about me every once in a while. It doesn't last long. As long as my ex kisses her ass she stops, when he doesn't pay attention to her, she takes it out on me.

 

Foolish girl.

 

Wow, I'm so glad I'm done with him and his drama and her too.

 

Even if I have to send my son to be with them, what they do matters not to me. I'm not fully healed yet, but I'm getting much closer every day.

Edited January 25, 2014 by Raena